So, I took a polygraph test yesterday.

Libby1978

It was for my new job.  I have been stressing about that shit for days.  I was nervous through the whole thing and thinking the whole time the dude was going to think I was lying about everything.  He, of course, kept a very straight face and showed no emotion throughout.  When it was finally over he asked me how I thought I did and I said I thought I did ok.  He told me I passed and that was followed by a huge sigh of relief from me.  The rest of my day was much better!  I hope I never have to do that shit again!

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Libby1978

@HilarityEnsued I had to fill out this huge booklet of questions ahead of time.  It was mostly questions about whether I've committed different crimes or taken illegal drugs.  Then the questions were general references to whether I was being truthful about x,y,z in the booklet. 

NotSharknado

I would freak out too. Once I had done a drug test for work and I was so paranoid even though I wasn't doing drugs.

Libby1978

MotherOfPearl85 said:

You had to take a polygraph for your job? 

Yep.  It's at a sheriff's office.  They give all new prospective employees a polygraph.

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Libby1978

@HilarityEnsued It's a job at our sheriff's office.

Libby1978

@fredalina I am not a good liar at all.  Really, as long as you answer everything in the booklet truthfully and you haven't committed some horrible crime you're fine.  They expect you to have some things in your past that aren't great, they just want you to be honest about it.

Libby1978

MotherOfPearl85 said:

Libby1978 said:

MotherOfPearl85 said:

You had to take a polygraph for your job? 

Yep.  It's at a sheriff's office.  They give all new prospective employees a polygraph.

Ooooh, ok. That would make me nervous too. Do they ask if you have ever stolen anything or something like that? I hate any type of testing involved with getting a job. 

Yes, one section was all about have you ever stolen anything as an adult.  Which I have not.  Then they had a whole section about crimes against people, then another section about drug use.

shadypines

That would be me the whole time.....

Libby1978

@Manneek1977 That was probably close.  Haha.  I was very aware of my heartbeat and breathing the whole time!!!

Libby1978

bearsbearsbears said:

My cousin has been locked out of LE jobs because the polygraph can't pick up lies for him... No matter what he says it registers as truth. It sucks for him.

Wow.  That sucks.

Luckie519

I am in law enforcement and I took a voice stress test and then also a personality test.

During the voice stress test (very similar to a lie detector), they ask you if you have ever done drugs, then they ask specific drugs, have you ever stolen anything, sold or bought drugs.  They even have you lie on purpose about a few things to get a base - I had to lie about a clock being on a wall and the color of my shirt.

For the personality test, they ask you things like if fire excites you, if you have ever had sexual thought about animals or children, they even asked a few sexual questions, and have you ever hurt an animal.

shadypines

And pretty close to this one too.....

Libby1978

@Luckie519 That is way worse!  Those are some oogy questions.

Libby1978

jack19 said:

Libby1978 said:

It was for my new job.  I have been stressing about that shit for days.  I was nervous through the whole thing and thinking the whole time the dude was going to think I was lying about everything.  He, of course, kept a very straight face and showed no emotion throughout.  When it was finally over he asked me how I thought I did and I said I thought I did ok.  He told me I passed and that was followed by a huge sigh of relief from me.  The rest of my day was much better!  I hope I never have to do that shit again!

I have taken many of these for my old job.  We had to do periodic ones to stay current.  Was very stressful

They asked sexual questions, drugs, bedwetting, you name it 

No one mentioned that I'll need to do it again.  Gawd I hope not....

Libby1978

Glad they didn't ask if I ever waste time at work talking to people on message boards!  haha But really, I think when I move jobs I'll be on here a lot less.  My job now is helping customers over the phone, so I have plenty of time for this place, but at my new job I'm pretty certain it won't be that way.  Sadsies.

Libby1978

jack19 said:

@libby1978 this was for government not private sector and after a while the questions become meaningless, but like @Luckie519 questions, they go deep into your personality.  The worst one I had was in Germany and it lasted for 90 minutes, it was exhausting

@jack19 I'm pretty certain I would have a meltdown and be carted off to the hospital if I had to do that!!

shadypines

 

Libby1978 said:

Glad they didn't ask if I ever waste time at work talking to people on message boards!  haha But really, I think when I move jobs I'll be on here a lot less.  My job now is helping customers over the phone, so I have plenty of time for this place, but at my new job I'm pretty certain it won't be that way.  Sadsies.

@Libby1978 the machine would have exploded. Like I should be talking.... @-) :^o :P

LadyXaverian

shanado said:

I would freak out too. Once I had done a drug test for work and I was so paranoid even though I wasn't doing drugs.

Definitely! I had to get a blood test for HIV when I was going through the immigration process. I knew I wasn't HIV+, but I still felt stressed over it.

I have never heard of anyone having a polygraph test for their job. Are you secret service, or something? lol

Libby1978

jack19 said:

Libby1978 said:

jack19 said:

@libby1978 this was for government not private sector and after a while the questions become meaningless, but like @Luckie519 questions, they go deep into your personality.  The worst one I had was in Germany and it lasted for 90 minutes, it was exhausting

@jack19 I'm pretty certain I would have a meltdown and be carted off to the hospital if I had to do that!!

its crazy but pushing you to see how you would react was also part of the test for my job so they purposely would go long on some of them.  Also do things like leave the room because they had to "discuss" an answer. Even then I knew that was BS so I would just go to a happy place during those moments

Yeah, I was kinda freaked because the guy showed no emotion whatsoever the whole time.  I know it's his job to be that was though.  He was super nice when it was over.

Libby1978

SarahL77 said:

shanado said:

I would freak out too. Once I had done a drug test for work and I was so paranoid even though I wasn't doing drugs.

Definitely! I had to get a blood test for HIV when I was going through the immigration process. I knew I wasn't HIV+, but I still felt stressed over it.

I have never heard of anyone having a polygraph test for their job. Are you secret service, or something? lol

@SarahL77 Haha.  Nope, not that serious.  It's at a sheriff's office.  And it's clerical work, but it's still required.