So my lawyer needed to know what my reasons are for moving back into my home and having my husband thrown out and as I was typing them out I realized just how dumb I was trying to make him happy and accommodate his needs while putting myself out. It helped me feel empowered enough to start making other decisions and cut out his feelings. Like my baby's name, I had let him chose the first name, and I thought to myself, why? He has not helped or gone to one OB appointment why should he get to chose the baby's name? So who picked it? My 11 year old son who has gone with me to countless appointments, taken care of me and been with me at the hospital. He chose his brothers name. I also decided what business does he have coming to the hospital to see the baby? He's not helped so I told my lawyer to tell him he can just see him during normal visits with his other sons after he is home and settled.
I guess I just realized so many of my decisions have been based in this idea that I did not want to hurt my soon to be ex husbands feelings, but what the heck do I care if he gets his feelings hurt? Did he consider my feelings or our children's when he threw us out and moved in his girlfriend? Nope I bet he did not even lose a seconds sleep. I think finally getting it though my head that in the next two weeks I am going to become a single mom to three boys has made me realize that I have to take care of me and my kids, let my ex be unhappy and bitter and angry with me, I have kids to raise and I don't have time for him anymore.