Tips to get LO to wind down at night?

musicalmama5

I am copying and pasting this from my post in my birth club....

I'm just coming off a rough bedtime...

I have a very active and very curious baby. Which is delightful and lovely, most of the time. It gets hard at bedtime because even though he's dog tired, he just won't give it up. For example, if I rock him, he literally jumps up and down in my lap giggling. If I sing or hum to him, he puts his hand on my throat to feel the vibrations and smiles or sings along or giggles. If I nurse him, he pops off every couple seconds to look around the room, again more giggling. You get the idea. I'm sure I'll look back on all this and think it's really cute, but right now it's driving me bonkers. 

We have a bedtime routine (bath after dinner, lotion/massage, books, nurse). And even though he's rubbing his eyes and yawning throughout, by the time we get to the nursing part, it's everything I mentioned above. He's so crazy. 

A couple times, just because I needed a break, I have left him for 5-10 minutes. He starts crying and works himself up pretty bad. Once I feel like I have garnered some energy, I go back to him, and at that point he's so exhausted that he will finally fall asleep nursing or rocking. But I really don't want to have to do this. I guess it's not really CIO, but it's too close for my comfort. 

So, after this novel (thanks for reading, btw), does anyone have any tips for getting him to chill out at bedtime? No CIO advice, please. 

TIA!

MommyPhoenix

OMG, thanks for asking this, I need advice on this too! My DD is the same. She babbled and cooed in the dark for an hour and a half last night and rolled back and forth from one end of the bed to the next! Only tip I have is for the bath....We switched to daytime baths instead of bedtime because I found she became waaay too hyper afterwards which didn't help bedtime. She's also cut her sleep time during the night to 10hrs instead of 12 for the past week. Bah!

Emerald27

I'd recommend trying to create an atmosphere totally of sleep at bedtime, to help him differentiate nighttime and sleep from daytime and play:

It is so common as they develop and become more aware of their surroundings that babies have a hard time unwinding and getting ready to sleep. When it's time for bed, you can give him a bath and read a book, brush any teeth he might have and put him in a clean diaper and pajamas. Then turn off all.the.lights and make the room as quiet (or use a white noise machine) and as dark as possible. Sing very softly as you nurse him, but don't engage him in a playful way. Nighttime and darkness is for sleep. It might take some time, but he'll learn and adjust and bedtimes will become easier. Try to be patient with your little one: he's learning how to handle the new experiences of perceiving the wide world.

Having him wear himself out crying isn't a very gentle approach and though he falls asleep sooner, he'll have been stressed and upset, and he doesn't understand. That doesn't create a positive association with sleep and bedtime...it could make bedtime more difficult in the long run because he'd dread being left alone for that time. It's difficult but well worth it to try and help him fall asleep with gentleness and love.

PumpkinAndThePeanut

Do you wear him and if so, does he wind down in the carrier? My DD does, so if it's bedtime and she's not digging it, my husband will wear her around the (quiet and dimly lit) house until she is very sleepy or asleep. My other DD winds down well in the swing. I'm on mobile so can't see your siggy; not sure how old your LO is.

My girls also love their Chicco starlight projector thing. I can leave them in their crib with it when I need a break and it calms them without stimulating them. We have this one:
https://www.diapers.com/p/chicco-goodnight-stars-projector-pink-464003?site=CA&utm_source=Google&utm_medium=cpc_D&utm_term=HD-236&utm_campaign=GooglePLA&CAWELAID=1406084043&utm_content=pla&ca_sku=HD-236&ca_gpa=pla&ca_kw={keyword}#

musicalmama5

Thanks, ladies!

@Emerald27 I definitely do NOT like him crying and exhausting himself. I'm looking for alternatives! I've only done it a couple times because I was just so touched out and needing a break. Both times I cried when I came back to him and started rocking/nursing. So yeah, definitely looking for gentler ways! I will try to be more consistent about creating his sleepytime atmosphere. Maybe part of the problem is that he goes down around 7 and at this time of the year it's still light out...

@wmorgan003 DS is 6 months. We do wear him and he always calms down. In fact, that's sometimes the only way we can get a nap out of him. Not sure why I didn't think of this for bedtime! Thanks for the tip.

Emerald27

Blackout curtains are your friends when it's light out in the late evenings (and early mornings)!

Really, just consistently and lovingly "reminding" DS that nighttime was for sleep helped us get through those rough patches. He did this whenever he would have a growth spurt or would hit a milestone (or was just about to).

If you're feeling touched out and need a break, a better solution than leaving the sleepy kid alone might be handing him off to DH to rock for a bit. Get a drink of water and 3-5 mins of fresh air, then come back to DS. Or like PP said, put him in the carrier and go for a short walk. A change of scenery/pace might be good for you, and DS may even fall asleep then!

musicalmama5

Emerald27 said:

Blackout curtains are your friends when it's light out in the late evenings (and early mornings)! Really, just consistently and lovingly "reminding" DS that nighttime was for sleep helped us get through those rough patches. He did this whenever he would have a growth spurt or would hit a milestone (or was just about to). If you're feeling touched out and need a break, a better solution than leaving the sleepy kid alone might be handing him off to DH to rock for a bit. Get a drink of water and 3-5 mins of fresh air, then come back to DS. Or like PP said, put him in the carrier and go for a short walk. A change of scenery/pace might be good for you, and DS may even fall asleep then!

Would that I could! DH is a musician and is gone every evening, so bedtime is just me!

MrsBigTime

I wear DD in the Ergo and go for a walk or wear her while I do some things around the house. By the time I'm done she's either asleep or mellow enough that I can rock her and she'll actually fall asleep.

musicalmama5

UPDATE! Tonight went a lot better. I took y'alls advice and put him in the Ergo. He still cried a good bit, but never hysterically, and at least I was holding him and he wasn't alone. It probably took just as long as it would have if I was rocking and bouncing him like I normally do, but since he was in the Ergo, I didn't get worn out as easily so I didn't feel the need for a break. 

Not perfect yet, but much better! I feel good about this. I think I'll make this a new part of the routine.