Can someone look at my pros and cons about my babysitter

thatoneredhead

My like/dislike ratio of my babysitter is around 85/15.

Cons

I HATE the way she is with her kids. She is so dismissive and disrespectful to them, sometimes downright mean.

She can be kinda condescending when she disagrees with me on something. She has so many kids of her own and has a daycare so she knows all. *I should add here that even though she may disagree, she has never gone against me. She just comments and throws alot of her advice in

Pros

She is really sweet to her daycare kids

LO has been going to her house since he was 10wks old

LO likes her and has cried when we left. 

She has been great with LO even though he wasnt(isnt) the easiest baby.

My schedule changes and she works with me on that.

Basically, our personalities clash a little bit. She does care about my kid and I play nice even when she pisses me off. If I ever doubted her with LO, I would pull him out immediately. If I did pull him, I would have no reason besides "I think you're mean to your own kids and sometimes really bug me with your comments," so that makes it awkward for me.

What would you do if you were me?

shadypines

I can not...... Its pretty obvious....

NativeFloridian

Maybe she's nice to daycare kids because they bring in money and if she's a dick to them she'll lose that cash flow.  Still, I don't think I'd trust her to be nice to my kids all the time if her "normal" attitude toward children is dismissive, and her attitude toward you is condescending.

As I learned with leaving my kids with my mom, the convenience isn't a good enough reason to leave the kids with a person who doesn't actually give a shit.

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s0ulchicken

My MIL runs an in home daycare. During the day, she ignores the heck out of the kids, lets them run amok, and plays on FB. When the parents arrive for pick up, she pours on the sugar and acts like they've had a FABULOUS day.

If you don't like the way she treats her kids, that is a huge red flag. I sincerely doubt she holds strangers kids in higher regard then her own. And if she does? That's pretty messed up too.

Libby1978

s0ulchicken said:

My MIL runs an in home daycare. During the day, she ignores the heck out of the kids, lets them run amok, and plays on FB. When the parents arrive for pick up, she pours on the sugar and acts like they've had a FABULOUS day. If you don't like the way she treats her kids, that is a huge red flag. I sincerely doubt she holds strangers kids in higher regard then her own. And if she does? That's pretty messed up too.

OMG!  That's terrible! @s0ulchicken.  I'm guessing MIL doesn't babysit your girls.

shadypines

question.. How old are her kids?

RondackHiker

If you don't like how she treats you and your kids, why are you there?

s0ulchicken

@Libby1978 oh heck no! That was actually the source of our last falling out. She kept pestering me about why I pay for daycare 2 days a week. She wouldn't leave well enough alone, so I told her. She has a host of other issues though, that's just the icing on the cake!

thatoneredhead

Manneek1977 There's 5. 2-like 14 or 15. She is a baby person. She seems to struggle in the 5-10 age range

@RondackHiker It's just the way she treats me (and her own kids). Every time I pick him up LO is "helping" her make dinner and just having a ball. 

RondackHiker

I just re-read the initial post... you don't like the way she treats HER kids.

If she treats her own children poorly and treats daycare children/paying well, I'd wonder what she's like when you're not around. A basic disrespect/dismissiveness of her kids consistently (so it's not just a one time bad day) would make me wonder if that's just her and how she acts toward children in general. I think most people are on their best behavior while in public, like she is when paying customers are there. I'd wonder if she treats all the kids that way when you're not around.

It'd bug me. Enough I'd probably leave.

shadypines

I would be looking for another provider ASAP.

lrn327

She treats the DC kids nice in front of you because you're her customer.  I'd be out of there asap if it was me.  Sorry.  :-(

thatoneredhead

Im am non-confrontational to a fault, but I guess it's time to get out my big mommy cajones and get a new babysitter.  

Thanks guys I kinda knew the answer, but I wanted to make sure it wasnt just me.

Im so nervous about dropping off my kid to someone new. Ugh. I think that has ultimately been my hang up. 

RayRay007

The first con is a pretty big deal...