FFFC

fellesferie

I am turning into that mom at DS's school. 

He's in 3rd grade, and this is the first year he's getting letter grades. And to be honest, he's doing fine so far... mostly As & Bs. But I find myself having all these problems I want to complain about! His school puts a BIG emphasis on speed in math, and he is required to do 30 +/- problems in a minute. By Christmas, that moves on to 30 multiplication/division problems. I think it's stupid. I am totally fine with grading for accuracy, but I don't think speed should be graded. If, for example, he can only do 15 problems in a minute, he gets a 50%. 

I've got another issue with his spelling list this week. He has a grammar test today on subject/predicate, and I'm pissed that he's being taught that a predicate is a verb (rather than the clause). 

His math homework (enVision) had ridiculous instructions that were so vague I couldn't decipher them.

I'm not complaining to the school (yet), and I never complain in front of DS. But I am really dissatisfied, and it makes me feel like a petty bitch. 

Hopeforthebest

My mom and dad smoked my whole life.

From early age (I caught a documentary on a Sat morning BEFORE cartoons) I began harping on them to stop. Hid their cartons of cigs. Everything a young kid can do.

FFWD 30+ years and mom has COPD. She is my very best friend in the world and I love her like crazy.

I'm sad and PISSED at the same time which makes for a confusing feeling.

My dad still hasn't stopped smoking and I'm livid.

redrae78

Hopeforthebest said:

My mom and dad smoked my whole life.

From early age (I caught a documentary on a Sat morning BEFORE cartoons) I began harping on them to stop. Hid their cartons of cigs. Everything a young kid can do.

FFWD 30+ years and mom has COPD. She is my very best friend in the world and I love her like crazy.

I'm sad and PISSED at the same time which makes for a confusing feeling.

My dad still hasn't stopped smoking and I'm livid.

I lost my mom 4 years ago to lung cancer.  She smoked a pack a day.  My dad and brother both still smoke and every time I see them I want to smack them both!!!

+just+j+

wendilea said:

I am THRILLED to have 3 days without the girls.  After the last 2 weeks we've had (C caught the house on fire yesterday, accidentally) I NEEEEEEEED the break.  Dink can deal with her whining about wanting her phone, ipod, etc back.  

I'm working a show tomorrow, and DH is working a half day, so it won't truly be a 3 day weekend, but we won't have kids here!

I think you earned and deserve this one. Enjoy it. Do you and hubby have any fun plans?

Ginlyn0

Hopeforthebest said:

My mom and dad smoked my whole life.

From early age (I caught a documentary on a Sat morning BEFORE cartoons) I began harping on them to stop. Hid their cartons of cigs. Everything a young kid can do.

FFWD 30+ years and mom has COPD. She is my very best friend in the world and I love her like crazy.

I'm sad and PISSED at the same time which makes for a confusing feeling.

My dad still hasn't stopped smoking and I'm livid.

My mom also has COPD. Luckily, my dad stopped smoking at the same time as she did but my sister hasn't. She used to be like me and complain about them smoking when we were kids. Now her kids complain to her and she does nothing about it.

Littlejen22

I HATE enVision Math too. And I will be very annoyed when DS is old enough to be timed although we had timed tests too as a kid. there needs to be a balance.

Nineoceans

fellesferie said:

I am turning into that mom at DS's school. 

He's in 3rd grade, and this is the first year he's getting letter grades. And to be honest, he's doing fine so far... mostly As & Bs. But I find myself having all these problems I want to complain about! His school puts a BIG emphasis on speed in math, and he is required to do 30 +/- problems in a minute. By Christmas, that moves on to 30 multiplication/division problems. I think it's stupid. I am totally fine with grading for accuracy, but I don't think speed should be graded. If, for example, he can only do 15 problems in a minute, he gets a 50%. 

I've got another issue with his spelling list this week. He has a grammar test today on subject/predicate, and I'm pissed that he's being taught that a predicate is a verb (rather than the clause). 

His math homework (enVision) had ridiculous instructions that were so vague I couldn't decipher them.

I'm not complaining to the school (yet), and I never complain in front of DS. But I am really dissatisfied, and it makes me feel like a petty bitch. 

Nope I feel you. SS is always coming home asking for money for fundraisers but he never knows what it's for.

His homework has terrible instructions too and last week we simply get something in the mail that he is reading a grade lower than what he should and he may be held back...shouldnt that necessitate a call, email or some direct communication? Frustrating

hopanka

Felles: do you volunteer in the classroom? Not sure, if your school allows it....mine is very pro-parent involvement (we are a charter), so whenever I question something, I increase my volunteering. Not only do I get to know the teacher better, but it gives me a great prespective and insight on why they do things the way they do. It also gives me more ammo, in case something truly needs to be said.

hopanka

My FFFC: people don't post true FFFC on this board. It turns into either "I'm glad to have a kid-free day", which everyone knows it's not flameful and it kinda seems like the poster is just begging for "I agree with you" replies (why? I don't know - neediness, perhaps); or they post things that are not flameful by definition because a majority feels the same way (i.e. smoking is bad...etc).

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 

fellesferie

Nineoceans said:

I am turning into that mom at DS's school. 

He's in 3rd grade, and this is the first year he's getting letter grades. And to be honest, he's doing fine so far... mostly As & Bs. But I find myself having all these problems I want to complain about! His school puts a BIG emphasis on speed in math, and he is required to do 30 +/- problems in a minute. By Christmas, that moves on to 30 multiplication/division problems. I think it's stupid. I am totally fine with grading for accuracy, but I don't think speed should be graded. If, for example, he can only do 15 problems in a minute, he gets a 50%. 

I've got another issue with his spelling list this week. He has a grammar test today on subject/predicate, and I'm pissed that he's being taught that a predicate is a verb (rather than the clause). 

His math homework (enVision) had ridiculous instructions that were so vague I couldn't decipher them.

I'm not complaining to the school (yet), and I never complain in front of DS. But I am really dissatisfied, and it makes me feel like a petty bitch. 

Nope I feel you. SS is always coming home asking for money for fundraisers but he never knows what it's for. His homework has terrible instructions too and last week we simply get something in the mail that he is reading a grade lower than what he should and he may be held back...shouldnt that necessitate a call, email or some direct communication? Frustrating

Ugh. There should definitely be a LOT of direct communication.

Last year DS's teacher talked about retaining him. We had to initiate ALL the conversations. We had to ask for meetings with her, the principal, the reading interventionist. We had to call the school psychologist. 

What are you guys going to do?

Hopeforthebest

hopanka said:

My FFFC: people don't post true FFFC on this board. It turns into either "I'm glad to have a kid-free day", which everyone knows it's not flameful and it kinda seems like the poster is just begging for "I agree with you" replies (why? I don't know - neediness, perhaps); or they post things that are not flameful by definition because a majority feels the same way (i.e. smoking is bad...etc).

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 

I thought being PISSED at your mother might be a flameful confession...when she is currently suffering.

fellesferie

hopanka said:

Felles: do you volunteer in the classroom? Not sure, if your school allows it....mine is very pro-parent involvement (we are a charter), so whenever I question something, I increase my volunteering. Not only do I get to know the teacher better, but it gives me a great prespective and insight on why they do things the way they do. It also gives me more ammo, in case something truly needs to be said.

DS's school actually requires parent involvement. Every family is required to volunteer 18 hours per year at the school, but many go far beyond that. 

I'm not in his class every week because I have a 3-yo at home. But I make copies for his teacher, bake for his class, go on field trips, etc. I pick a lot of my activities because I want to have a presence in his class for those reasons you mentioned. 

At the first PTA meeting, parents expressed our concern about the math/speed issue, and we have been pretty much dismissed. It's really frustrating. 

It sucks because this is the best public elementary school in the county. All these little things leave me feeling like I'm not drinking the right koolaid or something. 

hopanka

Hope: no, not really.

hopanka

fellesferie said:

hopanka said:

Felles: do you volunteer in the classroom? Not sure, if your school allows it....mine is very pro-parent involvement (we are a charter), so whenever I question something, I increase my volunteering. Not only do I get to know the teacher better, but it gives me a great prespective and insight on why they do things the way they do. It also gives me more ammo, in case something truly needs to be said.

DS's school actually requires parent involvement. Every family is required to volunteer 18 hours per year at the school, but many go far beyond that. 

I'm not in his class every week because I have a 3-yo at home. But I make copies for his teacher, bake for his class, go on field trips, etc. I pick a lot of my activities because I want to have a presence in his class for those reasons you mentioned. 

At the first PTA meeting, parents expressed our concern about the math/speed issue, and we have been pretty much dismissed. It's really frustrating. 

It sucks because this is the best public elementary school in the county. All these little things leave me feeling like I'm not drinking the right koolaid or something. 

Hmm, can you maybe sign up to help out with the math class sometimes? I volunteered at the math lab last year during my son's class time there, they did JiJi match, and it gave me so much great info...I was able to help my boy much better at home, if he needed it.

Idk, if perhaps you could find another mom in the same class who also has a toddler and you two could swap watching your younger kids when one of you volunteers for an hour?...just thinking out loud.

CurlyQ284

I never have anything REALLY flameful.

I guess the fact that I dick around on message boards all day instead of work could be flameful. I want to know WTF my team is doing because I produce more than the rest of them combined.

Nineoceans

Felles- BM says there's no issue and pulled him out of summer school..so we are following her lead. I will admit I'm disappointed in Dh's lack of initiative but after years of fighting with BM he's just over it.

Maybe that's my fffc? Nothing but reading more every night

sweetie0228

I check the local obits weekly and hope to see my Ex, just in case my ex was telling the truth and was dying.  But we all really  know it was just so he could stop paying CS and reliquish his paternal rights...although he hadn't exercised those rights in 5-6 years.

fellesferie

@hopanka I can definitely ask his teacher to let me know if there's anything she needs. I'll be in the office making copies for 2 hours next Thursday, so I'm hoping for an opportunity to just chat with someone.

The speed thing has been explained, so I do understand why they're pushing it. But I (and most parents) just disagree that it's necessary. 

I appreciate the suggestions. I hadn't really thought about asking to volunteer for academic stuff.

@Nineoceans FWIW, reading is really hard for me to teach at home. I was an English major and I feel like I'm totally failing DS here. His actual reading ability is okay (as in, he can read the words on the page), but his comprehension sucks, so his teacher evaluated him as technically below grade level right now. We read at least 20 minutes every school night, and 40 minutes on weekends but I feel helpless. 

So I can't say I blame you at all. 

+just+j+

hopanka said:

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 LOL!  Well then what the hell is the purpose of FFFC then?!? 

CFjo2010

hopanka said:

My FFFC: people don't post true FFFC on this board. It turns into either "I'm glad to have a kid-free day", which everyone knows it's not flameful and it kinda seems like the poster is just begging for "I agree with you" replies (why? I don't know - neediness, perhaps); or they post things that are not flameful by definition because a majority feels the same way (i.e. smoking is bad...etc).

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 

Well aren't you all sunshine and rainbows...

CFjo2010

My FFFC:  I really hope DC doesn't use his Winter Break this year.  I really hope he decides he is done pretending to give a damn about the kids and just crawls in a hole and disappears.  DS is already trying to get his coaches to say he has practice that he can't miss in December (seriously school doesn't even start until Tuesday) and he checked the school calendar hoping that he'll have Finals right after they get back so that he can use that as an argument to not go to DC's.  The kids are miserable at the thought of having to go in December and I really hope DC makes another grand gesture demonstrating why I refer to him as douchecanoe.

My other FFFC:  I went of on BM today at school and put her in her place in front of other people.  And it felt really effing good to stick up for K that way. 

hopanka

jobalchak said:

hopanka said:

My FFFC: people don't post true FFFC on this board. It turns into either "I'm glad to have a kid-free day", which everyone knows it's not flameful and it kinda seems like the poster is just begging for "I agree with you" replies (why? I don't know - neediness, perhaps); or they post things that are not flameful by definition because a majority feels the same way (i.e. smoking is bad...etc).

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 

Well aren't you all sunshine and rainbows...

That's the point, sweets.

If you want sunshine and rainbows, we can create SaRM (Sunshine and Rainbow Mondays), and I'll shine on...I'll bring unicorns, too!

EDIT: you get points, though....your FFFC is kinda flameful (which I like, thank you)...it'd be more entertaining, however, if you elaborated on why/how you shut her up and who was around to hear it. Pleaseandthankyou!

bebe11

hopanka said:

My FFFC: people don't post true FFFC on this board. It turns into either "I'm glad to have a kid-free day", which everyone knows it's not flameful and it kinda seems like the poster is just begging for "I agree with you" replies (why? I don't know - neediness, perhaps); or they post things that are not flameful by definition because a majority feels the same way (i.e. smoking is bad...etc).

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 

^kinda true.

I text and/or check email while I drive or sitting in traffic (sometimes).

I am often embarrassed to go in public with my SS because I hate the way he dresses.

hopanka

+just+j+ said:

hopanka said:

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 LOL!  Well then what the hell is the purpose of FFFC then?!? 

the point is to post something FLAMEFUL.

CFjo2010

hopanka said:

jobalchak said:

hopanka said:

My FFFC: people don't post true FFFC on this board. It turns into either "I'm glad to have a kid-free day", which everyone knows it's not flameful and it kinda seems like the poster is just begging for "I agree with you" replies (why? I don't know - neediness, perhaps); or they post things that are not flameful by definition because a majority feels the same way (i.e. smoking is bad...etc).

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 

Well aren't you all sunshine and rainbows...

That's the point, sweets.

If you want sunshine and rainbows, we can create SaRM (Sunshine and Rainbow Mondays), and I'll shine on...I'll bring unicorns, too!

I get that things are supposed to be flameful.  But do you really have to be such a bitch about not agreeing with what people post?

hopanka

jobalchak said:

hopanka said:

jobalchak said:

hopanka said:

My FFFC: people don't post true FFFC on this board. It turns into either "I'm glad to have a kid-free day", which everyone knows it's not flameful and it kinda seems like the poster is just begging for "I agree with you" replies (why? I don't know - neediness, perhaps); or they post things that are not flameful by definition because a majority feels the same way (i.e. smoking is bad...etc).

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 

Well aren't you all sunshine and rainbows...

That's the point, sweets.

If you want sunshine and rainbows, we can create SaRM (Sunshine and Rainbow Mondays), and I'll shine on...I'll bring unicorns, too!

I get that things are supposed to be flameful.  But do you really have to be such a bitch about not agreeing with what people post?

Oh oh, I got called a naughty name....even after I gave you points...and yes, I can be such a ehm ehm and not agree with people, BECAUSE THIS IS A FFFC....LOL

hopanka

wendilea said:

Hopanka - I'm sorry that feeling guilty about being happy my kids are gone isn't "flameful" enough for you.  I usually hate seeing them leave, so this is different for me.

How's this - I told DH he can go visit his kids at Christmas, or have them here and the girls and I will leave, because I will not deal with them.  Flameful enough for you?

Oh, and I smoke.  I quit for 6 months and the stress got so bad I started up again.  Better?

That is slightly better....although, your SK's are PITAs, so only mildly flameful (since it's about Christmas and all). The smoking - oh no - Wendi, BAD! Plus, it probably doesn't help your migraines, true?

CFjo2010

@hopanka I must say, I think I prefer dmnds' painfully ignorant rambling over your pot-stirring ways.  You rarely (if ever) offer actual support or constructive advice.  Whenever I see your posts you are just bashing whoever you can.  It must be sad to be so bitter and hostile as you clearly are.

And I'm done with you. Ta-ta  

hopanka

jobalchak said:

@hopanka I must say, I think I prefer dmnds' painfully ignorant rambling over your pot-stirring ways.  You rarely (if ever) offer actual support or constructive advice.  Whenever I see your posts you are just bashing whoever you can.  It must be sad to be so bitter and hostile as you clearly are.

And I'm done with you. Ta-ta  

Love it! Yes, I'm bitter and hostile....unlike you who went off on your SD's mother in public today...at her school of all places...where you're suppossed to be the PTA president! haha

docco11

Someone wrote BM a nasty letter...calling her out on her affair that she had on my DH, how rotten her D is because of the way she "mothered" her and didn't let MH or her new step-dad have a say in raising her or allow them to discipline/guide her, how the other kids in the home are going to suffer.  All kinds of things that I wish I could say to her, but never will because what would be the point? 

Anyway, no one knows who wrote this letter, it has to be someone very familiar with the situation which would be me, my DH, ExW, her husband, and his ExW, her parents, and MH's parents.  She knows it wasn't us as we live long distance and she was smart enough to see where it was postmarked from.  Of course she think it's MH's parents, my in-laws would say it to her face vs sending a letter and have no real reason to start up any drama...plus my MIL has been in the hospital sedated for 5 days.  My money is on her DH's ExW, but what do I know.

+just+j+

hopanka said:

+just+j+ said:

hopanka said:

Either you'all are squeeky clean or you're afraid of backlash (let's face it: if it's truly flameful, you will get flamed no matter, if it's FFFC or not).

 LOL!  Well then what the hell is the purpose of FFFC then?!? 

the point is to post something FLAMEFUL.

YES I KNOW.  It's also supposed to be where you can SAY something FLAMEFUL, and you don't get FLAMED.  It's not supposed to be fodder for you to come in every Friday and flame everyone.