Squinters--Advice Please

Marcilene1

This is my second cycle after a loss which was just a month ago.  We were NTNP and I was not temping, but based on opks and cm I think I am currently 11dpo.  I have been testing since 8dpo and have been getting the faintest squinters you have ever seen.  They have been getting ever so slightly darker day by day, but still super, super faint.  You can only see them in a certain light at the right angle, but they do pop up right away so I don't think they are evaps.  I am getting really worried that they are not obvious positives yet.  I'm scared that this means it is not a viable pregnancy and I def am not ready to call it a bfp yet.  My plan is to wait until Wednesday (13dpo) and test again with the hope that it is an obvious positive by then.  With my other pregnancies I was able to get an obvious positive by 10dpo so this has me nervous. Oh, and I also considered that maybe this is still hcg left in my system from the loss, but I tested it out a few weeks ago on a dollar store test so I don't think it could be that, right?  I've been testing with frer.  Thanks for any advice/input.

If it's not clear, what I am asking is 1) should I be worried at the faintness of the lines (I mean they are really, really, really faint to the point that I would not show my husband b/c he would think I am crazy, but they are def not stark white bfns), and 2) do you think that it could be hcg left in my system even though I tested it out a few weeks ago with the cheap tests?

Thanks for your responses and I realize that I need to calm the fuck down so honest answers are appreciated!

pantherRN

I know that sometimes you can tell where the second should be. I've done that before.

Milagros315

8-11 dpo is really early to be getting any lines at all so I wouldn't be too worried about the fact that they're faint. Also, I always read that the darkness of the line has more to do with the amount of dye in the test than anything else, so keep that in mind too.

I'm sorry for your losses. I imagine it's difficult not to worry, but try to just take it one day at a time. FX that this is it for you!

jcsumm0

I don't have any advice with squinters, but I just wanted to say ((hugs)) that must be so stressful.  I hope you get a truly *big* fat positive on Thursday.

Marcilene1

pantherRN said:

I know that sometimes you can tell where the second should be. I've done that before.

Yes, I have done that too and I guess it is entirely possible that I am doing that now, but I don't think it is likely with every one of the tests I have taken.  I am embarrassed to say that I have taken like 2 tests a day since Friday night and they are getting more visible so I don't know.  Maybe I am going nuts.  I wouldn't be surprised ha!

pantherRN

Can you just lay off the testing for a day or two? See what happens after waiting.

Amy+Ryan

Im very sorry for your loss. To my knowledge a line is a line no matter how faint. Keep testing and see if it gets darker.

Jing22

Sorry for you loss first.  I would try to test with another type of test if you have squinter.  I did get a positive digital test with my daughter when I just had a squinter with Wondfo.

GoaliesWife123

I'm sorry for your losses. I don't have experience with squinters (we just started ttc and had a bfn last cycle), but from what I have learned is that a line is a line, unless it is lacking color. If you read it within the time frame on the test, it is likely a positive test. I would keep testing until you are certain and then head to the doctor. Fingers crossed for you!

ksuRN09

I don't have advice but wanted to say my fingers are crossed for a definitive positive on Weds!

gscoville

To be honest I'm not sure I would trust testing out HCG levels with dollar store tests, and would question a doctor who doesn't do blood draws down to zero with any loss. At any rate, I'd wait a few more days before testing again, testing twice a day since so early DPO is clearly not doing you any good. Back away from the peesticks! See what kind of test you get in a few days, and if it still comes up positive, see your doctor and make sure they run betas for you over a few days so you can see if your levels are actually rising as they should.

MelanieAdam0707

I echo the "line is a line" comments- I just wanted to wish you luck!

jenb_99

I don't know about residual hCG, but my BFN at 9DPO in 2011 with FMU was a super squinter, and I still had enough hCG in my system to confirm an hour later with SMU on an EPT digital.

buggirl72

FRERs are pretty sensitive and can pick up pretty low amounts of HCG.  Since you used a different test to test out your HCG, it's possible that this is still left over HCG from your loss.

Have you taken a dollar store test to see if you are still getting positives on those? I also agree with @gscoville about having betas done. You need to see if your levels are going up or down.

Marcilene1

@gscoville and @buggirl72

I think you are right that I should wait and stop testing a while to save my sanity.  I did take a dollar store test on 8dpo and it was the same thing (squinter) whereas a few weeks ago it was definitely a bfn.  Is it really necessary for a doctor to track betas down to zero after a loss?  I got my period 12 days after the d&c.  Ugh I am so confused and ready to move on to the next cycle if this isn't it.  This is a total shit show you guys   This whole thing has been a goddamn shit show.

Thanks everyone for your sound advice, concern, and support.  It's stellar, as usual

gscoville

Marcilene1 said:

@gscoville and @buggirl72

I think you are right that I should wait and stop testing a while to save my sanity.  I did take a dollar store test on 8dpo and it was the same thing (squinter) whereas a few weeks ago it was definitely a bfn.  Is it really necessary for a doctor to track betas down to zero after a loss?  I got my period 12 days after the d&c.  Ugh I am so confused and ready to move on to the next cycle if this isn't it.  This is a total shit show you guys   This whole thing has been a goddamn shit show.

Thanks everyone for your sound advice, concern, and support.  It's stellar, as usual

I'm so sorry you're left in such a confusing position. ((Hugs))

FWIW, I didn't get my first true period until seven weeks after my loss at 8 weeks, and it took that same 7 weeks for my HCG to finally get to zero as well. I've heard many women say it took them even longer to get to zero. While if course it's possible, I just doubt that your levels were down to zero within 12 days of your loss for that bleeding to have been an actual period, but without the blood draws it's impossible to know what was the case there. Knowing for sure when you're down to zero helps with tracking cycles properly, knowing when you're having a 'real' period and not just bleeding from the loss, and when to trust an HPT as being positive for pregnancy rather than still-dropping HCG from a loss. To be honest, I'm also surprised your doctor gave you the ok to TTC again the first cycle after your loss, especially after a D&C, most women who've had that procedure are told to wait at least two full cycles to allow for their uterus to heal and be ready to build up a proper lining. Of course I don't know all the details of this doctor's handling of things, but right now I'm side eying him!

Ultimately, what you need is to wait a day or two, take another test, and if it's still positive, even a faint line, you should insist on getting betas done to see if your HCG levels are going up appropriately or not.

Marcilene1

gscoville said:

Marcilene1 said:

@gscoville and @buggirl72

I think you are right that I should wait and stop testing a while to save my sanity.  I did take a dollar store test on 8dpo and it was the same thing (squinter) whereas a few weeks ago it was definitely a bfn.  Is it really necessary for a doctor to track betas down to zero after a loss?  I got my period 12 days after the d&c.  Ugh I am so confused and ready to move on to the next cycle if this isn't it.  This is a total shit show you guys   This whole thing has been a goddamn shit show.

Thanks everyone for your sound advice, concern, and support.  It's stellar, as usual

I'm so sorry you're left in such a confusing position. ((Hugs))

FWIW, I didn't get my first true period until seven weeks after my loss at 8 weeks, and it took that same 7 weeks for my HCG to finally get to zero as well. I've heard many women say it took them even longer to get to zero. While if course it's possible, I just doubt that your levels were down to zero within 12 days of your loss for that bleeding to have been an actual period, but without the blood draws it's impossible to know what was the case there. Knowing for sure when you're down to zero helps with tracking cycles properly, knowing when you're having a 'real' period and not just bleeding from the loss, and when to trust an HPT as being positive for pregnancy rather than still-dropping HCG from a loss. To be honest, I'm also surprised your doctor gave you the ok to TTC again the first cycle after your loss, especially after a D&C, most women who've had that procedure are told to wait at least two full cycles to allow for their uterus to heal and be ready to build up a proper lining. Of course I don't know all the details of this doctor's handling of things, but right now I'm side eying him!

Ultimately, what you need is to wait a day or two, take another test, and if it's still positive, even a faint line, you should insist on getting betas done to see if your HCG levels are going up appropriately or not.

@gscoville
I'm so thankful for your expertise here.  I will definitely wait as long as possible to take another hpt (I'm aiming at Thursday or Friday now).  Honestly, I am side eyeing my doctor too!  I had no bleeding at all after my procedure.  Not sure if it's relevant, but I had a natural m/c earlier in the day where I bled a lot and passed the baby on my own.  I ended up with an emergency d&c that night because I was still bleeding and an ultrasound revealed that some tissue was still stuck.  Then after 12 days of no bleeding at all I spotted one day, had light bleeding next, and then spotting again the day after that.  It was all brown blood. I called my OB and told her all of this and she said that it was my period (?).  She also cleared us to ttc again during that conversation based on my follow up examination and the period.  Also during that time, and I am not sure if it was a little before or a little after that "period" I tested negative on a dollar tree hpt.  I thought it would be ok to just ntnp until my next cycle.  Now I am kind of regretting that decision   I wish I knew one way or another what the hell is going on right now.  Again, thank you so much for your expertise and your kindness here.  I cannot tell you how much it means to me.  This is kind of a lonely process.

Marcilene1

snuff9861 said:

Marcilene1

Nothing to add but I freakin love your siggy picture.

@snuff9861 Thanks   I love me some Spike!

mrstengallonhat1

So sorry for your previous loss.  I agree with PPs.  I would wait and test at the end of the week to see, and if I was still getting faint positives, I would call my dr. for a blood test just to make sure it's not residual HCG in your system.  FX those lines continue to get darker!

Marcilene1

 

wickedsugar said:

FWIW, I don`t think that was your period.. Maybe some odd residual stuff since you said it was brown. And (not to bash you) but because no precautions were taken, it leaves you in the tough spot of not knowing what the fuck is going on. My best guess is residual HCG..

 

@wickedsugar

Don't worry, you're not bashing me.  I wasn't taking any precautions because my doctor said it was ok to start trying again.  Now that I look back, I wish we had waited until I was absolutely sure that the hcg was out of my system (I'm not too sure about those dollar tree tests).  Also, I think you are right about it being residual hcg causing the positives.  I feel like if it was a new pregnancy they would be getting significantly darker by now