Surgery and Frustration

SandiaPinaMama

So, when my little man was 7 months, I was diagnosed with DeQuervayn's Tenosynovitis. After nearly 2 years, I had surgery last week to correct it. Surgery went well, and I think I'm glad I did it, but only time will tell.

I can't lift DS1 now. It shouldn't be more than a month, but we're renovating to make room for LO, so DH can't help me. My mom is awesome, but she burns out. DS is pushing my buttons so much, I just get to feeling so frustrated with him. I find my voice rising, and I catch myself being rougher than I intend. Then I just feel like crap. I know the surgery healing is short term, but I'm thinking DS may be a moody toddler for the foreseeable future. Anyone else running out of patience? What do you do to stay sane and calm?

I used to run, but I also have a miniscus tear, so there's not much I can do to workout these days. I go back to work this week, so maybe that will help.

shaindelr

I'm sure going back to work will help :-) In the meantime, those books on Buddhism for Mothers are great.

https://www.amazon.com/Buddhism-Mothers-Young-Children-Becoming/dp/1458716821 and

https://www.amazon.com/Buddhism-Mothers-Approach-Yourself-Children/dp/1742373771/ref=pd_sim_b_1 .

I wish I had more advice on staying sane and calm. I do think it's important to get outside every day -- with or without your child(ren). I don't know how possible that is with your injury, but maybe even just letting DS1 run around in the yard while DS2 plays on a blanket or something.

I am realizing that I am NOT a kid person. I'm working at it, but #@$#@!!! Do you have friends who could help out? I have child-free friends who enjoy taking Liam to the park, etc., so I can get work done.

Know that I'm thinking of you... The whole parent gig is unbelievably tough :-(

siajara

I am struggling quite a bit as well.  I like this list for tips:

https://theorangerhino.com/alternatives-to-yelling/

Also, we are tried to figure out ways to get dd to do things for us without 'bribes' per say but with things she likes.  It turns out she really likes to see mommy or daddy do prat falls ( (totally realizing you can't do this due to surgery).  So to get her to lie still during a diaper change, we promise to "fall down out of shock that she laid still!"  It turns out she also likes to see her stuffed animals fall down - it is the funniest thing in the world to her.  So things like that are making the terrible two's a little more manageable...

shaindelr

siajara said:

https://theorangerhino.com/alternatives-to-yelling/

Thanks for that list! That looks awesome!