Feeling Guilty

JenniferF11

Having a rough morning today. I feel so guilty all the time when I'm holding one girl and the other is crying or fussing. I know I'm only one person - but they didn't get the memo. How do you cope when both twins need you? At the end of the day, I'm feeling like I failed one or the other. When I have help, I have completely different babies who sleep most of the time since they can both be held. But when it's just me they never sleep!

carrotcake06

I hear ya. I have one that is constantly crying (I think it's reflux) and one that is relatively chill so I'm always holding the screamy one.

I usually end up wearing one in the k'tan and then if the other needs to be held, I'll pile him on top of his brother and awkwardly sway or sit on the couch. sometimes it works. Then I'm really covered in babies

shaunah816

You're right in the thick of the hardest time right now. I wrote a very similar post when my boys were that age, and everyone here was so sweet and reassured me. You're being a GREAT mom. You're right, you're one person with two babies, so you can't do everything. Your babies know you love them, and they know they need to share you. It gets easier as they get older, which is little consolation now, but it's so true! You're doing a great job, you really are. 

Dragonfly1226

I wish I had some advice but I am right in the thick of things too and have the same guilt. Between taking care of newborn twins and our two and a half year old I often end the day feeling like I let everyone down. I keep trying to remind myself that I am just one person and doing the best that I can. The thing is we all want nothing but the very best for our kids so we put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect. I will say that when I see my little girls smile up at me I know they are getting what they need.

mirnb

take a deep breath and know that this too shall pass! This is such a hard time but try not to feel guilty! They will never remember and you are doing the best you can! It will get easier!

laraashleyt

You do what you have to do right now. They will know they're loved! When they both cry, I hold both...still at 10 months old! I don't get to hold them the most perfect way, but they're next to me and I do the best that I can in that moment. Take it hour by hour. Like PP said...it gets better and more manageable every month. I'm at 10 months and although its still crazy, it's great!!!! Hang in there MoM. You're doing a great job!!!

kbeach82

You're doing a great job! It really will get easier. My twins are only 3 1/2 months old and already things seem SO much better than they did even a month ago. There are times when all 3 of my kids seem to need me at once, and I just do the best that I can. That may mean holding one on my lap while another snuggles next to me on the couch and the third gets silly faces and raspberries while they sit in the swing in front of us. Just do whatever works at the time. Hang in there!

JenniferF11

Thank you everyone. Just reading your posts makes me feel like I'm not alone in this! Thank you for the reassurance that things will get better. Your encouragement is so helpful!