I keep getting this question overandoverandoverandoverandoverandover again, "So when are you guys planning on having one?" I absolutely adore children and always have, so I'm often asking people about their children, grandchildren, pregnancies, and their family's children. I love hearing the stories and how happy people get when talking about them. I love seeing the pictures and just being thrilled with and for them.
I wish I would just learn and chill on that for the next couple months. Because I keep doing it and the question they always ask is when I'm going to have one. I guess I've always gotten this question, but the answer before was always, "In about 5 years," or "In about 3 years." (We changed our minds only recently and didn't tell anyone.)
It doesn't help that work started up again last week so I'm talking to a lot of people. (I can't wait for the students to come back (my not-really-adopted babies! Yay! ) And every single day at work I get that question at least once. Today was the worst. At lunch my boss was talking about her darling little girls and I was thrilled. Then she asked when we were planning. My head shot up and my eyes went wide and I dropped my sandwich (I wasn't feeling great today between my first period and broken finger (which I got from being too distracted by being upset about the loss to pay attention to where it was in relation to the darn car door.)) She took it as fear of being a parent and everyone thought it was funny, which was good and an easy way to play it off. Then she started talking about how great it is to be a parent and how wonderful and how she thought she couldn't love anyone more than her husband, but-- I don't know what she said after that. I ran. I don't like people seeing me cry. I'll have to apologize for being rude and explain next time I see her. She was just being nice and normally it would've been a lovely conversation I would've really enjoyed, but it's 29 days since our loss and my husband and I are still utterly devastated.
Sigh. Got off track, sorry. Anyway. So I'm just getting asked that A LOT! Every time I feel like I die a little inside. I don't even know what I say to them. I think I just make unintelligible sounds....