Work Exit Strategy Help

SWA80

I'm 31 weeks 3 days. I have a very stressful job but do get to sit at a desk all day. The current plan is for me to deliver somewhere from 34-36 weeks depending on how things look at my growth scan next week. My MFM has said he'll write me a note whenever I would like him to but I feel like work expects me to come in up until I deliver. I honestly could suffer through a few more weeks but I don't want to. I'm incredibly uncomfortable and have short term disability insurance to help out since work will only pay me for 6 weeks.

We hired a temp to fill in while I am out and she started yesterday. I hope not to work after next week but when I hint around about it, I get blank stares. I don't want to be seen as a slacker so I'm not sure how to convey that I need to go ahead and start leave. Any advice? It is obvious that I am uncomfortable but I don't think my coworkers see this as different than any other pregnancy.

Stephanie2167

I'd have your doctor write you a note for when you want to start and blame it on him.

Hope these next weeks fly for you and you get some rest.

PinkinProvence

My plan is to try to work up until I give birth (as long as there are no complications) because I only get 12 weeks (by FMLA) maternity leave whether that is taken before or after birth (or a combination thereof.)  I have short term disability insurance too, but I think it only pays out for 8 weeks.  I will take the other 4 weeks unpaid, but I would rather be home when the babies get here.

That being said, if you are too uncomfortable, no one can side-eye you with a doctor's note.  I am sure the doctor's note will say it is a medical necessity.  I would probably drop a few hints to my co-workers that I am really upset to have to leave but my doctor is forcing me. 

Good luck and I hope you feel some relief! 

SWA80

PinkinProvence said:

I would probably drop a few hints to my co-workers that I am really upset to have to leave but my doctor is forcing me. 

This is a great idea!

I'm probably only going to be able to manage 8 weeks off after the babies are born regardless of whether I take off before or not. There is going to be a lot of pressure on me to get back.

bosmommy3

Listen to your body.  I started telling people in my office well in advance so they were prepared for my departure.  I ended up working until 34.5 weeks.  But honestly, I think people expected it, since I was pregnant with twins.  It's definitely a lot harder on your body from a singleton pregnancy.  When I was pregnant with or DS I worked up until the day I went into labor.  With the twins, I was exhausted by 6 months!

lwatkins12

I worked a week past my due date when I was pregnant with my DS. I'm not working at all now. It's a shame that in this country we as women are made to feel guilty or just do feel guilty about taking care of ourselves or children.

bethCT

I had an apt on May 4th and they started watching me for complications then.  I am a professor and skipped the may 5th graduation but really, if I had any other job, I would have been pulled then.  I went in on Friday the 4th and told everyone.  I was really honest.  There are some complications (with me, not the babies and everything turned out fine) and my doctor is pulling me.  You can always tell them that your doctor is making noises about pulling you out of work soon and ramp up the temp training.
Even being home from may 5 to delivery, I was miserable. Listen to your body, rest and relax! 

SWA80

lwatkins12 said:

It's a shame that in this country we as women are made to feel guilty or just do feel guilty about taking care of ourselves or children.

Yes, it really is. I guess a lot of it is pressure I put on myself. I'm the primary breadwinner and I know I push myself too hard. I do believe the best thing I can do for the babies and for myself is to stop working. Just going down the stairs this morning brought me to tears I was in so much pain. I need to get over the guilt and work will be fine, they'll just have to manage without me!

Nikkdam

Can you cut down your days maybe or hours and maybe work from home? Otherwise they definitely need to cut you some slack!! This is hard work! I stopped at 34 weeks last week and glad I did!! Honk I should have stopped two weeks earlier even.

SWA80

@Nikkdam To start my short term disability pay, I have to go out full time. I have hinted about working from home one or two days a week but it wasn't well received.