BFing fail.

JulyMomma2U2

Went to a lactation meeting today after my Mom casually said she thinks DS2 looks the same and not like he's gained weight. Well, she was right. In 9 days he gained one ounce. One. Effing. Ounce. Took him to the ped to confirm. She has us coming back Friday for another weight check and in the meantime nursing every 2 hours no matter what. I feel like the biggest failure. First, it wasn't even me who noticed him not gaining/changing.. 2nd, here I am thinking he's getting more than enough, but nope, so not the case.. I thought BFing was the "best thing" for DS, and instead I'm practically starving him. God I suck. I don't get it. I did a. Weighed feeding at the LC meeting and he ate 3oz... Why isn't he gaining then???

melly918

I'm so sorry.  Keep up what you're doing and hopefully you will have better news on Friday.  Please do not be so hard on yourself. Hugs!!

awesnap

You are not a failure, you have hit a bump in the road. Breast feeding can be so frustrating sometimes and babies don't always gain weight in a nice even way. Big hugs, you are good mom and are doing what's best for your baby. Hang in there. 

Junebug060609

You aren't a failure.  BF is hard, and there are sometimes bumps in the road..not to mention that babies weight gain isn't always along a nice curve.  Sometimes they stall and then suddenly shoot up...in my experience it goes hand-in-hand with growth spurts.  It takes time to figure one another out with BF'ing.  Even if you nursed your other child, this is a different child...he has to learn you and you have to learn him.  It won't happen overnight, but it will likely happen with time.

 

martinimomma

All of the above and extra ((hugs)).

katigox

Since I couldn't BF, take my suggestion with a grain of salt; but could there be something else, that might be causing the no weight gain?  Maybe you are doing everything right (which sounds like you are, based on the weighed feeding), so maybe he's just got a super fast metabolism or something??

And I don't think it's a fail that you didn't notice him gaining weight; and you definitely aren't starving him!  Obviously all you noticed was him being happy and content (which is a relief with 2u2, and a newborn in your arms lol), and that's a good thing.  Plus, if he was actually starving, you'd notice a few other signs ~ I still think it sounds like it could be something other than BFing (nothing serious, but definitely not something to beat yourself up over).  JMHO.

GL with Friday, and I hope you get some answers!

JulyMomma2U2

Thanks ladies.

luvmyducks

I'm sorry hon. I had issues with DD1's weight as well. They finally stopped pushing the issue when they saw she was ahead in all her milestones and completely healthy otherwise. She started growing like crazy around 18m and is 50-60th percentiles compared to the 11-13th percentile she was as an infant.

FmrAFBrat

Hang in there. It's tough. DS1 didn't grow a lot early on, but went from 0 weight and 30 length to 30 weight and 90 length by the time he was 9 months old. It's hard but just keep on doing what you think is best. I'd be willing to bet the issue is NOT you.(HUGS)

Mom2anAngel2

Big hugs! You don't suck! I agree with PPs that BFing is hard, especially in the beginning. You are doing a great job! More hugs!

adoxyinherear

HUGS HUGS HUGS. You are NOT a failure! Everything everyone else has said. BFing is not easy, it's not predictable, and it can be so hard to feel like you're doing what you should. Hang in there.

s0ulchicken

Huge hugs to you. BFing is hard, hard work, and I am sorry you're struggling. Please be gentle with yourself, you don't suck, and it looks like you're taking all of the right steps to stay on track. Deep breaths momma!

JulyMomma2U2

andrea ri 80 said:

You are not a fail, no matter what happens here, I have to share with you that the exact same thing happened to me, but I wasn't as perceptive as you and your mom.  my son had regained his birthweight at his 2 wk appointment, but some where between the time he was 2 weeks to a month old, he not only stopped gaining, but started loosing like crazy (he fell not only back  below his birthweight, but below his lowest weight).  I was so stupid, I didn't see it.  He cried ALL the time, I called LLL and the bfing support line, they convinced me that it was totally normal to nurse around the clock and have a fussy baby.  I still can't look at any pictures from when he was a month old, his cheeks are hollow and his skin was mottled.  I went to an IBCLC and he was only transferring 1/2 oz after nursing 35 mins.  I was soooooo far gone,, she basically advised me not to BF.  I felt so stupid because I thought everything was going great and I was just pushing through growth spurts or something like I was supposed to.   

My son is still a peanut.  He can wear the same size diapers as my 5 month old. 

BFing is the best if you can make it work for you, but it really wasn't the best for me.  People act like everybody's always been able to BF.  Before formula, the babies that were not able to be breastfed were fed cows milk or whatever they had lying around and were at risk of dying of dysentery.  

Huge hugs to you... I have that same pang of guilt every time I look at DS now.. How did I not notice he's not grown??? He's still so teeny tiny?? At 2 weeks old, my other DS was like almost 9lbs! And here's DS2.. Still below birthweight. Ughhh. I just posted an update.. I'm starting to supplement.. And I hope to get BFing back on tack, but right now all I can focus n is that he's hungry, FWIW.. Every lactation person and the LaLeche woman etc have all said the same thing,, it's normal for him to want to eat constantly.. It's normal for him to still be jaundice,. It's normal for him to fuss and root constantly, etc.. Can I just say,, after I fed him the 3oz bottle he was so peaceful and content,, he looked around for a few minutes and then drifted of to sleep... God I feel so awful now. I really thought our biggest hurdle was getting over the "painful" part of nursing,. We're almost there.. And yet, I feel like our chances of success with EBFing are dwindling away. I never thought I wouldn't have enough milk,, the crazy part, Monday of this past week I was on the phone with my LC for oversupply issues... Transitioned to block feeding for 2 days,, thought that fixed the issues.. And now, I went from squirting across the room to bone dry and not able to nourish DS. Stupid body.