Taking older sibling to anatomy scan — The Bump
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Taking older sibling to anatomy scan

We are set for our anatomy scan in late August. Our son (5-1/2) is unbelievably excited to find out the sexes of the babies. We are going to find out at the scan. Have any of you taken the older sibling to the scan? I know it is long process but really want him to feel included. Any advice is appreciated.

Re: Taking older sibling to anatomy scan

  • Not to be snarky, but the point of the anatomy scan is not to find out the sex of the babies. The point is to make sure everything is growing correctly and on track with the babies. I guess my point is that if god forbid you were to get bad news, would you want him there? There can be some really hard conversations to have at anatomy scans, and he would be there. I personally would leave him at home and do something fun with him to tell him when you return.
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  • My office has a rule that no one under 12 can be present at an ultrasound.  I have seen them enforce it even when moms had no one to watch their other children in the waiting room.  I would to check to see the policy in your office.

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  • We took my 9 yo stepdaughter and she was bored senseless. It is a really long appointment - 45 minutes per baby. She was excited to learn that she had a brother and sister on the way, but she was so bored the rest of the time that it was distracting for me and my husband.
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  • Our perinatologist's office did not allow children. My mom watched our son when we had our anatomy scan and we shared the pics after.
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  • I think it would be much more exciting and meaningful for you to surprise your 5 yo after the appointment. You could do a scavenger hunt for clues, a puzzle, or I like MrsLee's suggestion of cupcakes or balloons.

    My scan with the MFM consult took two hours. It would not have been fun, interesting, or exciting for a kid, even if he or she was allowed in the room. I also agree with everyone's comments about the risk of bad or upsetting news and not wanting a child there for that.
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    I don't have any other kids, but we wanted to reveal the sexes to my family during a vacation that was scheduled 3 weeks before my anatomy scan, so we did an elective "gender scan" at a private facility. It took less than 10 minutes and the environment is kid-friendly. It wasn't crazy expensive either. Something like that would be much better for a child. And the point of that ultrasound would be to find out the sexes. I agree with the others that an anatomy scan is a long and nerve-wracking experience. We only got good news at ours, but I still don't think I would have wanted an older child with me. I would say either do an elective ultrasound or find some other way to share the news.
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  • I hate to be a downer, but my 20 week a/s was when we found out our last baby had no heartbeat. It was awful and not something I would want anyone there for other than my husband, much less a young child. You could do something cute to tell him when you get home...colored baloons are something. It is just a huge risk to take. Plus, you want to be concentrating on the u/s and what is going on and not have to be distrated.

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  • Like others said, our mfm office does not allow children. I think the rule is especially for sensitivity to others. A lot of people are there because they are losing/lost their baby. Last thing they want to see is cute little kids running around. Plus it is such a voting appointment and could be upsetting. I think the private gender scan sounds like a great idea!!

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  • I'm clearly in the minority because my son (who was 2) came with us to a couple of my ultrasounds, the MFM's office had no problem with it. He was young though and I think it was just for quick cervix checks, he wasn't with me during the a/s. We already had about ten high res ultrasounds and knew the sex and told him. He's now 4.5 and thinking about what he comprehends, I'm pretty sure I would just take him to an elective u/s just to find out the sex. It's like $80.
  • Our anatomy scan took over an hour and a half and they were running behind so we were there for over 2.5 hours (which really sucked when you are holding a bladder full lol). I couldn't imagine having a child there. They would be bored plus like others said, you could (godforbid) find out some pretty awful news. I'd do what others have said and pay for an elective scan.

                              

  • Thank you everyone! We have decided to wait and tell him afterwards. I just cannot wait to find out :) we go aug 28th!!!!
  • Our MFM didn't allow kids but our ob did. So, after we did a couple of the big anatomy scans wih the MFM and felt secure in the babies development, I asked my ob if I could being my 4 yo to an appt. We made it special for her there. She got to ask any questions and they did an in office u/s. And my ob was prepared that my dd would be with me.
    Hol84
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