Advice needed re mystery gift

Cleo421

Hi Ladies,

DH and I had our fourth and final shower yesterday, and all in all, we've been completely spoiled and fortunate. We're now taking stock of our registries as we plan to buy them out before the twins get here.

For the past two months, our BRU registry has shown both the bouncers we've ordered as purchased. One we received back in early June from DHs aunt. The other one we've not yet received, and we have no more showers. MIL said she'd ask the aunt if she really purchased two, but I asked her not to, bc that's potentially embarrassing for the aunt if she just bought one. We also thanked the aunt for the bouncer, singular, in a Ty card and weren't corrected.

So I called BRU this morning and explained the situation. One bouncer was purchased at the store in the town in NY where DHs entire family lives. The other was purchased the day before online. They said they have no way of seeing who did the online purchase, but confirmed that they did get paid for two. The one that we received from DHs aunt sure looked like an online order with the packing slip and all, but they said it could have also been shipped from the store during an in store purchase.

Color me mortified that we were purchased a gift two months ago and have yet to thank this person. Should i have MIL ask her family and friends? Should we ask the aunt directly if she purchased online or in the store? Should I just do nothing, assume that the person hasn't mailed it yet, go ahead and buy a second bouncer, and return the gifted one if and when we receive it? My only problem with the third plan is that if the purchaser did send the gift and it got lost in the mail, they'll never receive a thank you card or acknowledgement from me.

I'm also pretty irritated that BRU has collected payment for two expensive bouncers and can't find any info as to the purchaser of at least the online order!

doublefiesta

If you definitely just received one bouncer from DH's aunt, I would send a thank you note immediately. If she did indeed buy 2, the note should get the ball rolling on her end on why the 2nd bouncer hasn't reached you yet.

Cleo421

We sent the Ty note to the aunt a couple days after receiving the bouncer. We talked about the bouncer, singular, and weren't corrected by her.

Meery82

Just to clarify, you've only received one bouncer, right?

doublefiesta

I see, reading comp fail  :-/ Well, sounds like the aunt is a dead end.

Would you be comfortable getting the word out, maybe through FB, about what's going on?

I wouldn't buy another bouncer just yet. I'm not a twin mom but it's possible one or neither LO won't like the bouncer.

ANDOPANO6

I had this happen with a wedding gift last year. It took me 7 months to actually find out who the sender was and I had to get them involved in recouping the gift. Mine as from Macy's and after calling them about 6 times they finally told me who purchased. They should be able to see the order purchaser online or not. They could at Macy's. the shipment was sent to entirely different state and re-stocked in Macy's warehouse. In the end after a long battle, I finally recovered the gift. Just keep pursuing it. I also hated that I didn't get to thank that person till much later, but I had no idea who sent!

StayingSecret

I think it's simple.  Someone bought it for you and didn't give it to you.  

If you need another one, buy another one or wait it out.

Cleo421

Meery82 said:

Just to clarify, you've only received one bouncer, right?

Correct. But BRU was paid for two.

Cleo421

StayingSecret said:

I think it's simple.  Someone bought it for you and didn't give it to you.  

If you need another one, buy another one or wait it out.

Well, my concern really isn't how I'm going to get the second. We can just go out and get one. My concern is looking like an ingrate that doesn't acknowledge gifts or send Ty notes. Your plan sounds good, but as I said above, if I go off that assumption I risk looking like a jerk.

I like pp's idea of maybe saying something vague on FB. It would be pretty uncomfortable, but not as uncomfortable as thinking that a friend spent $60 on a bouncer, wasted their money bc we never received it, and thinks that i just never bothered to thank them.

AndoPano, I think you're right that someone at BRU has to be able to track it. I think I'll call back in the morning and ask to speak with a supervisor.

Meery82

I would wait until after the baby is born to begin investigating. I got a bunch more gifts after baby arrived. My guess is someone bought it and hasn't given it to you yet.

polinaant

I'd be pissed at BRU. How can they receive payment but not know from where. They must have some info like what method of payment used. If it was mailed etc. they would have a transaction number and at least tell u when exactly is was purchased. Maybe help to narrow it down somehow.

cinderin

Meery82 said:

I would wait until after the baby is born to begin investigating. I got a bunch more gifts after baby arrived. My guess is someone bought it and hasn't given it to you yet.

this would be my guess also. I would just wait. I don't think you are going to need two bouncers right away. 

mysticl

polinaant said:

I'd be pissed at BRU. How can they receive payment but not know from where. They must have some info like what method of payment used. If it was mailed etc. they would have a transaction number and at least tell u when exactly is was purchased. Maybe help to narrow it down somehow.

Maybe it's against their policy to release that information.  OP it's possible someone bought it and is waiting for the babies to be born to give it to you.  

Crispity

cinderin said:

Meery82 said:

I would wait until after the baby is born to begin investigating. I got a bunch more gifts after baby arrived. My guess is someone bought it and hasn't given it to you yet.

this would be my guess also. I would just wait. I don't think you are going to need two bouncers right away. 

That's my guess as well. For close friends, I give a shower gift, and another gift after the baby arrives. I usually get them both when I shop for the shower, so both would show up as purchased if I bought them off the registry. 

Another possibility is that someone bought you something at the store from your registry, and also purchased the bouncer for themselves or someone else. I once bought bottles for my daughter at Babies R' Us while I was shopping for a friends' shower. The bottles that I bought happened to be the same ones that my friend registered for, so I had to do two separate transactions to make sure they didn't get taken off of my friend's registry. 

ETA: I think it's unlikely that it was your aunt who bought the other one, because she probably would have bought them both at the same time if she was having them sent to your house.

amberayra

I agree with the previous posters perhaps they can not give you the persons name. Can they at  least tell you if it was sent to you? I wouldn't worry to much about looking like a jerk I mean you did not get the gift. If the bouncer should of made it to you by now I would assume the purchaser would do follow up if they hadn't been thanked.

JilllyBean

I'd worry about it a few weeks after the baby was born. 

Nicolewinsbingo

Meery82 said:

I would wait until after the baby is born to begin investigating. I got a bunch more gifts after baby arrived. My guess is someone bought it and hasn't given it to you yet.

This. Also I think its fine to ask the aunt whether she purchased in store or online. If she bought online, I bet the other buyer is still planning on giving it to you and it would be rude to try to find them on Facebook. But if your aunt bought in store, I'd wonder if the online order got lost in the mail. If aunt bought in store, I'd call BRU back and insist to know whether the online order was shipped to your address or the buyers address, and go from there.