I think I understand now

bethleean

I think i understand all the hostile, negative, angry, hopeless and other feelings that seem to be lingering in the "air" on this board now. TTC naturally for two years had plenty of uts own negative feelings, but then you decide to consult a doctor, he tells you there's a problem, then offers a solution. You are filled with hope at their suggested solution, and believe that the outcome with their help will be different than the outcome you had on your own. And then when it turns out to be just as much a failure as you had on your own, I think it hurts, frustrates, and disheartens more than it did before you had any help from anyone. I hope that everyone on this board finds the answers they are looking for and eventually, get the answers to their prayers. This isnt a fun road to go down...im finding that out pretty quickly.

GermanGirl2007

bethleean said:

I think i understand all the hostile, negative, angry, hopeless and other feelings that seem to be lingering in the "air" on this board now. TTC naturally for two years had plenty of uts own negative feelings, but then you decide to consult a doctor, he tells you there's a problem, then offers a solution. You are filled with hope at their suggested solution, and believe that the outcome with their help will be different than the outcome you had on your own. And then when it turns out to be just as much a failure as you had on your own, I think it hurts, frustrates, and disheartens more than it did before you had any help from anyone. I hope that everyone on this board finds the answers they are looking for and eventually, get the answers to their prayers. This isnt a fun road to go down...im finding that out pretty quickly.

I agree with much of this - I think individual feelings of anger, hopelessness, frustration, dispair, sadness, etc. are all completely natural.  I've felt them all, at various times throughout our 2 1/2 year journey. But I honestly think that I must have missed something, because I have not once sensed on this board the hostile or negative energy as noted in the first sentence of your post. In fact, quite the opposite. I'm sorry if you are feeling that way, but please try to remember that the vast amount of support, knowledge and advice far outweighs any one-off negative comment that may pop up from time to time.

monimu13

GermanGirl2007 said:

bethleean said:

I think i understand all the hostile, negative, angry, hopeless and other feelings that seem to be lingering in the "air" on this board now. TTC naturally for two years had plenty of uts own negative feelings, but then you decide to consult a doctor, he tells you there's a problem, then offers a solution. You are filled with hope at their suggested solution, and believe that the outcome with their help will be different than the outcome you had on your own. And then when it turns out to be just as much a failure as you had on your own, I think it hurts, frustrates, and disheartens more than it did before you had any help from anyone. I hope that everyone on this board finds the answers they are looking for and eventually, get the answers to their prayers. This isnt a fun road to go down...im finding that out pretty quickly.

I agree with much of this - I think individual feelings of anger, hopelessness, frustration, dispair, sadness, etc. are all completely natural.  I've felt them all, at various times throughout our 2 1/2 year journey. But I honestly think that I must have missed something, because I have not once sensed on this board the hostile or negative energy as noted in the first sentence of your post. In fact, quite the opposite. I'm sorry if you are feeling that way, but please try to remember that the vast amount of support, knowledge and advice far outweighs any one-off negative comment that may pop up from time to time.

I'm fairly certain she is speaking of a comment from me yesterday, but I don't find myself to be any of those things you listed OP...at least not at the moment.  There are days when all of us feel hopeless or angry...and its perfectly OK to feel that way.  But I don't find that to be the general feeling of the entire board.  

bethleean

Oh, im sorry, I wasnt very clear about that first sentence. I didnt mean the board was hostile in general lol. I just meant the ocassional feelings of hostility, anger, sadness. ..etc. that come with the different struggles we are all dealing with. And that are mentioned by everyone on here at some point or another. I didnt mean that anyone is particularly hostile or anything like that, and perhaps that was a poor choice of words on my part. I just mean that im beginning to understand a lot of the feelings that are portrayed.

bethleean

And I wasnt referring to any comment in particular. Im sorry if it came across as such.I just staryed to understand how hard all these struggles are for everyone here, and how they affect us all differently. I didnt realize how much harder it can be when you dont get the results you want orexpect...even with a doctors help. Its hard, and I see now how quickly it can all start to weigh on a person. I want to thank all the ladies here for all their help, advice, understanding, and emotional support. I know its hard, especially with everyone going through their own difficulties and experiences.

rox825

bethleean said:

... you decide to consult a doctor, he tells you there's a problem, then offers a solution. You are filled with hope at their suggested solution, and believe that the outcome with their help will be different than the outcome you had on your own. And then when it turns out to be just as much a failure as you had on your own, I think it hurts, frustrates, and disheartens more than it did before you had any help from anyone.

Yes, I can definitely relate to these feelings. Hope is sort of a double edged sword, it keeps us going month after month but then makes it worse when we don't have a good outcome. IF sucks.

bethleean

rox825 said:

bethleean said:

... you decide to consult a doctor, he tells you there's a problem, then offers a solution. You are filled with hope at their suggested solution, and believe that the outcome with their help will be different than the outcome you had on your own. And then when it turns out to be just as much a failure as you had on your own, I think it hurts, frustrates, and disheartens more than it did before you had any help from anyone.

Yes, I can definitely relate to these feelings. Hope is sort of a double edged sword, it keeps us going month after month but then makes it worse when we don't have a good outcome. IF sucks.

I am so glad you understand what im trying to say! You got it all in a nutshell!

GermanGirl2007

bethleean said:

... you decide to consult a doctor, he tells you there's a problem, then offers a solution. You are filled with hope at their suggested solution, and believe that the outcome with their help will be different than the outcome you had on your own. And then when it turns out to be just as much a failure as you had on your own, I think it hurts, frustrates, and disheartens more than it did before you had any help from anyone.

Yes, I can definitely relate to these feelings. Hope is sort of a double edged sword, it keeps us going month after month but then makes it worse when we don't have a good outcome. IF sucks.

I am so glad you understand what im trying to say! You got it all in a nutshell!

Got it! And yes, I agree. I go through so many ups and downs. One day I can be completely hopeful, and the next - about ready to throw in the towel. IF really does a number on your emotions.

NJHopeful

GermanGirl2007 said:

bethleean said:

... you decide to consult a doctor, he tells you there's a problem, then offers a solution. You are filled with hope at their suggested solution, and believe that the outcome with their help will be different than the outcome you had on your own. And then when it turns out to be just as much a failure as you had on your own, I think it hurts, frustrates, and disheartens more than it did before you had any help from anyone.

Yes, I can definitely relate to these feelings. Hope is sort of a double edged sword, it keeps us going month after month but then makes it worse when we don't have a good outcome. IF sucks.

Got it! And yes, I agree. I go through so many ups and downs. One day I can be completely hopeful, and the next - about ready to throw in the towel. IF really does a number on your emotions.