STTN but doesn't fall asleep until very late

melly918

We created a little monster.  DD now cannot fall asleep on her own for nighttime sleep. The Ferber method worked in the beginning but somewhere along the way it fell apart and now she will cry and cry until I'm too fed up to share the bedroom with her and she is plopped into DH's arms downstairs until he rocks her to sleep. By then it's after 11pm. Right now it's after 11pm and she's been doing this for the past 40 minutes. I've gone to her, picked her up, soothed her, but once I put her down she starts her shit again. I know we are putting her to bed too late and we are trying to gradually move her bedtime earlier but she isn't having it and we end up going to bed later than what's been "normal" for her.  I have a copy of the No Cry Sleep on reserve at the library.  I need to have her asleep at 7 by Labor Day because when I go back to work I have to be up around 5 AM. I am just losing it right now and she's still screeching so once again I'm too fed up to put up with this so I'm gonna either nurse her to sleep or take her to DH.  I am just venting here, if any of you have any suggestions while I wait for that book to be available, much appreciated.  Now going to get the hellion out of what she obviously perceives as her jail cell. SIGH!!!!

ProfessorPedals825

((Hugs)) Do whatever you need to get her sleeping tonight and start fresh tomorrow. The author has a website where she puts excerpts from her books online. You can read the key points from the book here while you wait for the library. https://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/books/0071381392.php I hope that helps a bit. Good luck!

melly918

Thanks. She went down at the ungodly hour of 11:30 pm. DH once again got her to fall asleep. I told him we were going to start the process at 8:30 tonight since it takes nearly two hours to get her to fall asleep, we can hope she will conk out at 10:30.  

ProfessorPedals825

I think the main thing I got from that book and the Nap Solution book is the "Endurable Awake Time" between sleep cycles.  It is only a guide, but for a baby 6-9 months of age, they can only endure being awake for 2-4 hrs.  Our DD is 4 months and really starts to lose it by 2 hrs.  On good days, she can do 3 hrs, but 2 hrs is still our standard.

So after her late afternoon nap, she'll wake up around 6-6:30.  That's when we start our nighttime routine.  We'll play, eat, bathtime, lotion, jammies, etc.  By 8pm, she's worn out.  I'll give her just a bit more milk, burp her well, then swaddle, lay her in the crib, and stand there with the pacifier.  It will take about 5 mins, and she's out.  I'm basically using the full 2 hrs to cue nighttime sleep.

But, then there's this scenario. We went to the dog park the other day and stayed until it got dark, then came home and did our regular routine.  She was awake for 3 hrs and fussed and cried and it was NOT easy to get her to sleep.  It took another hour of fussing before she finally got to sleep around 10pm.  Basically, we passed that good sweet spot of perfect sleepiness, and she just couldn't take it.

Again, that's not true for all babies, but it definitely helped us to understand her sleepiness.  I hope tonight is better for you.

melly918

I totally agree that we are missing the window of opportunity. I did some reading on Pantley's website and I realize there are times DD needs a "third" nap which is around 5:30 to 6:30 pm on some days so if she does go down at that time and wakes up I will keep her in our darkened bedroom, nurse her one last time for the day, and try to put her back down for the rest of the night.  

Stay tuned!! I sure sounded like the mommy from hell based on my first post. I am just frustrated because we had a routine that worked and it fell apart when we stayed overnight a few days with the ILs and we are going back there in two weeks so I feel everything we are working on will be for naught. 

katigox

FX that this gets better soon!  Keep us updates on what works