DC vs. Montessori School - which would you choose?

virginiagirl11

We found out yesterday that DS1 got into the local Montessori school. Now we have to decide whether to keep DS in his current daycare or move him to Montessori next month. We have to decide this week. What do you think? The cost is about the same.

Daycare Pros

We've been there a year and know what we're dealing with

Established program

All meals are provided

DS gets a ton of socialization

It's a pretty good quality daycare that is loosely based on the Montessori philosophy

Open all summer

Daycare Cons

There are one or two kids in each of the toddler rooms that are not very nice kids and DS, normally extremely kind and empathetic, is picking up bad behaviors/habits from them. One of the kids is his cousin so that makes it trickier. We've spoken to SIL multiple times but don't expect much to change.

Not a lot of individualized attention from teachers. Teachers seem too laid back with discipline and teaching good habits and kindness

I don't trust the PM playground supervision (not his regular teachers) and a couple of structures are inappropriate for DS's age. We've talked to his teachers about it

Less structured learning

Larger classes

The kids are less controlled and rowdier

More chaotic environment, though stimulating no doubt

The director is kind of unhelpful about handling things that she doesn't perceive to be concerning. Feels like she plays favorites and usually sides with the teachers.

Montessori Pros

Smaller classes

More individualized, higher-quality attention

The Montessori philosophy seems to suit DS's personality perfectly and this is a true Montessori school

More controlled, intentional atmosphere; less chaotic

Calmer, more respectful kids who were selected to be there

Very nice, appropriate playground

Better trained teachers with good reputations

Seems to be a lot of adult respect toward children

Montessori Cons

We don't know what we're dealing with; grass may not be greener

Might have to adjust our work hours

Parents take turns bringing in PM snack for class

Closed more often than DC, including for the entire summer (we'd have to be able to use DC in the summer....we're looking into it)

Great reputation among those who know about it but I've heard the director gets in his own way and can be stubborn when working with the parents

Less administrative structure due to it being a much smaller facility; more like a small community of families who all work to keep it running

The front door does not have an auto-lock/key fob system, though the office is near the front.

Would it be too serious/quiet/controlled? I don't know.

We like DS's DC and it's considered to be one of the best around. It's more like a preschool than the other daycares in the area are, which we like. If we kept sending DS there, I think he'd be fine. He likes it and is always willing to go. However, I don't like the negative influences (I know there will always be kids like that, but the worst is his cousin, esp. since she targets him). Plus, the teachers, while we like them, aren't able to pay a lot of attention to the kids individually and the floating helpers don't seem all that great. It all feels rather chaotic.

It seems like DS would learn a lot more at Montessori, would be treated better by the other kids and get along with them really well, and would receive better quality, more respectful, and more frequent attention from the teachers. His personality seems perfect for Montessori.

However, if we switch, we may have to give up his spot at the daycare unless DS2, who is supposed to start there in June 2014, counts as our family tie to the DC (we're finding out). We also risk alienating the DC; if we tried to come back after not liking the Montessori school, it could be difficult.

My main concern is that the Montessori school will be unremarkable and less fun for DS, and the sacrifices we made to get him there will be regretted and not worth it to keep him there. Then we'd have to go through the stress of trying to get him back into the DC and he'd have to readjust. However, if the Montessori school is truly the way to go, then it will probably be a total win for DS.

I just don't know. WWYD?