Baby #2 after first was preemie

mrsjodiii

First, I want to say that this is a post to say some things "out loud" and not have my mom or anybody else say, "Stop worrying" or "You're crazy."  I just need to get this off my mind.  

So, with my first, I went into premature labor at 30 weeks, delivered via emergency c-section at 32 weeks after 2 weeks of hospital bedrest.  They do not know what caused me to go into labor except maybe some dehydration and a possible uterine infection.  So no real answers.  Now, I am 25 weeks along, have been monitored more closely, with cervical length u/s along the way, and I've also been getting the P17 shots since week 16.  I've had a few bad days, with Braxton-Hicks and not feeling great, but otherwise, nothing abnormal.  Here's my qualm though.  Everytime I fell a sharper than normal kick/tug/pull, everytime I got to the bathroom, even when I'm just not feeling exactly "right", I fear the worst.  I fear that when I wipe after going pee, I'll see blood (this is what happened last time), I worry when I don't feel her kick for about 30 minutes that something happened.  I've had horrendous dreams this time around, with everything from car accidents where I lost the baby AND my little boy, to where the baby dies in-utero and I have to deliver and then bury her.  I am normally a level-headed woman, and am doing my best to not stress, but sometimes I feel so overwhelmed with the enormous responsibility of carrying this child to term.  I don't know if anyone else feels this way, but if you want to share your experiences, go ahead.  Thank you for at least reading this.

heme

I just want to say I'm sorry that you are going through these emotions...and it seems that it is normal to worry. Try not to worry you are getting the proper care.

I have read on other posts that women do have full term babies after having a preemie. which gives us hope. Currently we are TTC and we worry but we try to have faith and hope we'll just get through it.

KellyMichelle

Your feelings are very normal.  What you experienced with your first baby was traumatic and it is normal to worry about it happening again. The good thing is that your doctors are watching you closely and chances are you will do great and have a healthy full-term baby.  Just try to stay positive, but do listen to your instincts.

kcswifey

I am sorry that you aren't able to enjoy this pregnancy...I assume that this is completely normal after having a preemie!  I just wanted to tell you that your story mirrors mine almost exactly except for I delivered at 28 weeks and 3 days.  I am thrilled to hear that you are being monitored so closely!  Good luck and keep us posted!

RubyRed7

I'm sure many would feel the same way in your shoes. I haven't even thought about #2 yet, but I know when the time comes I too will not be able to help but worry! Especially when things seem out of your control. All you can do it listen to your insticts, take as good care of yourself and your baby as you can, and try to enjoy all the positive moments that you can! I wish you all the luck in the world, and I hope that even if your mom can't relate that you find support in your husband or in places like this board!

 

SCOOTER

my first pregnancy was a pre term delivery of twins at 30w6d after 10 days of hospital bedrest and 2 weeks home br.  I just had #3 two weeks ago at 38w2d and I too spent months wondering when I would have my baby.  Your feelings are totally normal and we all "get it."  I'm so glad to hear your doctor is taking extra good care of you.

KrisFlower

With my first pregnancy I went into pre term labor at 33 weeks after 5 days of hospital bedrest I delivered my baby girl. ?We have no idea why I went into labor! ?Like you with this pregnancy I'm super scared and worry about every little thing. ?I'm seeing a maternal fetal specialist this time and I'm going to start the 17P shots at 16 weeks but I still feel like I'm not going to carry this baby full term. ?I can relate to what you are feeling and it sucks.

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georgy77

DH & I are both freaked about having another baby after this experience so I totally understand where you're coming from.  Hopefully you can try and relax and take some comfort in the fact that you're being watched so closely.  I know easier said than done, but I hope you'll be able to enjoy this pregnancy.   

monica92603

I just want to tell you that you are not alone.  To say that being pregnant can be very overwhelming is the biggest understatement.  You put it perfectly into words that have escaped me... "the enormous responsibility of carrying a child to term"......

I had a m/c w/ my first pregnancy 2 1/2 years ago.  Now that I am pregnant again, I just keep thinking the worst.....first that it would be a chemical pregnancy, then when I went in for my first appt/ultrasound that there would be no heartbeat etc etc.  I am now at the exact point where the dr discovered my missed m/c 2 1/2 years ago but the difference is that I had an appt on xmas eve and we saw our bean moving and kicking and saw and heard the heartbeat.  What a relief.  Now I worry about my first tri screening next week that they will find a problem w/ my baby.  and it goes on and on.  I don't even want to know what type of crazy paranoid mother when my baby is born.

I'm sure if you and I feel this way, there are many more of us out there.

Best of luck to you.

gibs

My first was born at 36 weeks. ?I was totally paranoid every day from 26 weeks on with #2. ?I made it to 38 weeks.

dmblack

Like you I was very scared when I was PG with #2.  I also got the 17P injections from weeks 16 - 36.  Many of the others on here probably feel the same way you do.  All I can say is that having a preemie the first time around changes you.  Many women who have carried babies to term simply don't understand these feelings.

 I can tell you that after having my DD at 26w3d -- I did go on to carry my DS to term.  I had him at 37 weeks.  So just remember -- every pregnancy is different.  There is no reason why you won't carry this baby to term.  I believe that luvmyfireman was close to having her term baby (her son was very early).