PLEASE..Somebody tell me what to do..I HATE

AWD

mealtime with DS. I swear I dread it everyday. He has gotten to be such a  battle. It just keeps getting worse. We started this thing over a year ago (when he began dropping into the 10% for weight) of giving him a toy and he would just eat and eat. However that no longer works, he can feed himself but he won't. MIL says it eats great at her house (w/toys). Well tonight she was at our home and couldn't get over how much of a struggle it was to get him to eat. It's like putting on a freakin circus! He had trains, cars etc.. And it's been like this at every meal for several months. I know he is teething now but this has been a struggle for several months not just recently.

DH had an idea where we set a timer (say 15-20 mins) try to feed him ,no toys and no matter how many times he says DOWN do not get him down until the timer goes off. If he doesn't eat get him down and not give him anything until the next meal. 

Honestly I am about to pull my hair out! Do you think this is a good idea and he will hopefully catch on, that this is when we eat no if ands buts about it?

We have tried everything. He went from his highchair to a booster, we tried letting him sit on his knees in one of our chairs, that didn't work b/c he just kept getting down. He also has this thing where he will not chew stuff up that isn't crunchy he just kind of lets it sit in his mouth until it turns to mush. Example for lunch he ate a couple bites of grilled cheese but just left it in there until it melted. The chips he had though he would chew them up. Any suggestions?

ali-1411

You have to stop fighting with him.  With kids its all about control, and he is totally winning.

Does he cry at meal time?  What about when its not mealtime, does he want a lot of snacks?

W&J'sMommy

Have you brought this up with your pedi?

Just the crunchy thing made me think, sensory issue. 

AWD

No he doesn't cry he just turns his head away. He doesn't ask for snacks only milk ALL the time. I do limit his milk so he doesn't fill up on that. So if it's within 2 hours of a meal I give him water.

Heidisean

I agree with previous poster.  Since this is also effecting his weight and becomming a medical issue I would have him evaluated by an OT. It is also getting you and dh frustrated.  I am a pediatric OT and we deal with feeding issues all the time.  They would assess if it is a sensory issue or not.  They also would like to see if it is a chewing issue and if he can chew with lateral tongue movements and well without any gagging or coughing.  You can either go outpatient for the eval or through EI.  I would suggest to do outpatient for the eval and then if there is an issue to switch over to EI because they would come out to your home and work with him if there is an issue.  It wouldn't hurt to rule out a problem.  GL

CubbyMama

I know this is really hard, b/c we've had food battles with DD before, too, but I have to say that toddlers will ALWAYS win a battle of wills. They have endless amounts of energy and time, whereas we don't!    I would simply stop fighting with him.  We tried forcing DD to eat with us, bribing/threatening her to take X number of bites, etc. and all it ended up doing was making her cry and us frustrated...miserable all around.  I just gave up.  If she eats, great.  If not, she won't let herself starve.  I don't care if she snacks all day (as long as they're somewhat healthy most of the time) or eats "legitimate" meals anymore.  We give her Carnation Instant Breakfast as "chocolate milk" and the vitamins in that, plus her daily vitamin, make me feel like she's at least doing OK nutrition-wise.  The stress of battling over it with her just got to be too much, and it's much easier now that we've given up the battle.  GL!