TTC After a Loss

dh is so on a different page.

I feel bad slightly because tonight my dh wanted me to go to a friend of ours house for some drinks but I didn't want to go because myself  and his friends wife had found out that we were pg just a few weeks apart I just didn't feel up to going and seeing her at the same point in her pg as what I should be.  I know that is probably horrible and I am so happy for ALL my 7 friends who are or pg or just had healthy babies but at the same time if I can avoid situations like that I feel it is for the better.  I tried to explain it to my dh but he doesn't understand.  He says he deals with his emotions differntly but at the same time he didn't see the ultrasound when there was no heartbeat at my 13 week appt and I don't think he gets the attachment that we (women) get when we find out we are pg or the feeling we have prior to poas. He ended up dropping me off at home after we went to dinner and going to our friends house....should I feel bad or do I have some good reasoning for why I didn't want to go.  Also I am bummed because I was out with my girlfriends earlier and would have stayed out with them all night if I knew this is how my night was going to end...good thing ELF is on.

 thanks for letting me vent!!!

Re: dh is so on a different page.

  • You don't have to feel bad for staying home. I have a really hard time seeing my friends who are the same pg as I should be, too.

    I'm watching Elf, too! I love this movie!

  • I wouldnt feel bad at all.  I too am avoiding those situations, it saves unnessisary heart ache.   However, I would feel bad if I didnt got with DH to his friends house, but then went out with my friends....
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  • I would have done the same thing

    Don't feel bad

    You are right though, you could have taed out with the girls...


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  • I would have done the same thing.  You shouldn't feel bad....
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  • I'm sorry. I've been through this with DH too - I think he feels there should be a time limit on my sadness. Sometimes he's better than others.... Our best friends (a couple - we were both in their wedding, they were in ours, etc) are also expecting and she is just 8 weeks ahead of me, so it's painful to see them even though they are just wonderful. You are right.... but I can see where DH doesn't think he did anything wrong. Unfortunately guys are such different creatures and think very differently.


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