Postpartum anxiety/depression - any one else going through this?

Alid86 · December 2014

I'm sorry if this has been discussed but I'm just wondering if anyone else has been dealing with this? The doctor seems to think I have more anxiety symptoms than depression but I can see both. If you are or have dealt with this is there anything that is helping? I'm on anxiety medication that has helped a little but I just feel so overwhelmed when I'm alone with my DD who's 3 and DS who's almost 5 weeks. I live in fear of him crying and me not being able to stop it / and he has been a lot fussier and not sleeping very well lately so that isn't helping. I was anxious with DD but not to this point! Sorry I guess I just need to reach out for support more than anything as no one in my life seems to understand

silverwings72 · December 2014

I have noticed my anxiety is high since having LO. This is also affecting my blood pressure so I keep having this anxiety attack cycle in the evening. It sucks!! Big hugs to you for acknowledging the problem and reaching out. We are here for you. >:D<

Alid86 · December 2014

Thank you so much @lovebuggies1‌! Sometimes it's so hard feeling all alone in this. I may need to reach out for counselling in addition to medication. I'm so sorry you are dealing with this as well! It's so tough! I am hoping and praying all us mamas dealing with this will feel better soon

Jatpa003 · December 2014

I have PPA and now PPD. I have had extreme anxiety throughout pregnancy and now after birth. I agree that my traumatic birth had a huge deal with it. I have been seeing a psychologist for the last 6 months, I have a psychiatrist appointment in a couple weeks to look at meds and have been going to PPD/PPA mom meetings. It's not a one solution fits all problem, the more resources you have access to the more likely there will be something that works for you. Good luck.

Ineedmorecoffee · December 2014

Does anyone else have anxiety, but it's more of anxiety of irrational fears? Like bad anxiety that something awful will happen?

Alid86 · December 2014

I love the check in idea @lovebuggies1‌! I would not wish this on anyone but it is also nice to not feel so alone as well (hope that doesn't sound bad!)
@Ineedmorecoffee‌ I definitely have a fear of the irrational - I tend to think worst case scenario of perfectly normal every day events - it's exhausting and something I try talk myself down from.

Alid86 · December 2014

It's hard to be in such a small community where there is not a lot of resources for dealing with this.

Ineedmorecoffee · December 2014

@Alid86‌ I wouldn't say I'm depressed but I always think of the worst case scenario in normal situations too and I agree it's soooo mentally exhausting. Like the other night, I was cutting something open with scissors and had anxiety that somehow they would fall and cut the baby or when I'm drinking coffee that it will dump on her and then I am so worried it makes me sick.

Alid86 · December 2014

I can relate @Ineedmorecoffee‌ - my big thing lately is driving...I'm terrified of other people swerving into out lane or my tires blowing out. At home I have a fear of dropping DS because I'm overtired! We mommas will get through this!

Edit - spelling is hard

Ineedmorecoffee · December 2014

@lovebuggies1‌ I am sorry you are struggling with this too

it really is horrible. Sometimes I feel like a prisoner in my own brain. And it's stupid because I will sit there and tell myself how dumb I'm being but I still can't shake it.

hidingangel82 · December 2014

Ineedmorecoffee said:
Does anyone else have anxiety, but it's more of anxiety of irrational fears? Like bad anxiety that something awful will happen?

Yes! I'm so worried I will leave LO somewhere while I'm out.
I was at the doctors office e yesterday with lo, and kept touching his car seat to remind myself he was with me, because I was *terrified* I'd get up and leave without him. Today I've wondered all day how I can label the carseat so that if I leave it & baby somewhere, whoever funds him can contact me.

WTF, self?

hidingangel82 · December 2014

Just wanted to say hugs to all of you ladies.
I'm overwhelmed with baby anxiety and depression as well, but don't know if it's my bipolar II, baby blues, or ppd.

mamatohne · December 2014

My ob prescribed a medication for me and I just started taking it today. I was worried about it when I was still pregnant. I can't say that I'm depressed but Definitely anxious and incredibly irritable. I'm hoping the medication helps because I hate feeling like this.

Snuffy007 · December 2014

I met with my psychiatrist yesterday and mentioned those worst case what-if thoughts, she said it was very common and they're called something like intrusive thoughts. I'll look at my notes tomorrow, I'm about to try to get some sleep but just wanted to say I'm right there with you ladies! It's a lot to deal with, and I agree a check in thread would offer a lot of much needed support!

Alid86 · December 2014

I was also worried about this happening but never thought it would be this tough! Thank you ladies for sharing your struggles - I'm so sorry you are all dealing with this!

klak819 · December 2014

I am experiencing similar feelings! I tried to surround myself with people and have invited as many people over as I can. It helps take my mind off of the "what-ifs" and prevents me from Googling things. My worries focus on him not eating enough and him not consistently waking himself up to eat and that he sleeps a lot with very few awake times. I have been on medicine for a little more than a week, but know it takes a while for these things to kick in.

Alid86 · December 2014

Does anyone else worry about how much sleep they will get at night? Or being alone during the day with baby?

Jatpa003 · December 2014

Alid86 said:
Does anyone else worry about how much sleep they will get at night? Or being alone during the day with baby?

Yes, I get really bad anxiety at night, like literally as soon as the sun sets I start freaking out. And then when the sun gets up knowing that I will be alone with her is terrifying. It's a cycle that just repeats and the lack of sleep really doesn't help.

Alid86 · December 2014

@Jatpa003‌ - aww I totally understand that feeling

it's awful! Hugs

bumpuser10336873 · December 2014

@Alid86‌ - I definitely worry about getting enough sleep, and worrying about it keeps me up when I have a chance to sleep! I'm most anxious about getting enough sleep at night when I go back to work, I'm a nurse and I can't function at work on 2 hrs of sleep. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to get 5-6 hrs of sleep before work and pump at night, and then feed LO? I'm also anxious about being able to pump while I'm at work...I'm usually too busy to eat or go to the bathroom, not sure how I'll be able to take the time to pump twice in a 12 hr shift. I have nightmares about this stuff on a regular basis now - anxiety sucks.

Alid86 · December 2014

@everydaygirl83‌ it's awful! Hugs!

pennyandandy · December 2014

I had really terrible PPA after DS was born. It took me a while to realize it. I never took meds, but I did see a counselor and she helped me with some visualization exercises and developing a plan about the things that made me the most anxious, like taking the baby out in public, or handling my dogs and the baby at the same time, or cooking dinner, or whatever it was. It really helped to figure out what my major triggers were and know that I had a way to go about it. Also, even now when I'm anxious I have to stop and think that I just have to get through this one thing, and I focus on doing it step by step until it is done. I have not been nearly as anxious this time, but I tried to prepare as best as I could, and I knew what I was getting into better the second time.

goldngirl24 · December 2014

Yes I literally had a break down right before I read this post. I was crying hysterically because just when I thought DS was down for the night he woke up crying and not go back to sleep- I panicked because I too worry about how much sleep I'm going to get at night - 5.5 to 6 max and not consecutively of course. These 5 weeks have been so hard, I'm still in pain - can't go through the day without Motrin hospital prescribed me, I'm still bleeding, and I can't have help because even though my husband and family offer they work when I need the most help - late night, and they don't have the boobs! I try pumping but whenever I do LO wakes up early hungry and then I don't have enough milk to feed him. He's not on a predictable or somewhat routine yet. He used to fall asleep after every feeding and stay that way but now he's alert for a long time before crying 30 min to fall asleep. He should be asleep now he's done 10:30-2:30 every single night for 2 weeks straight and being up with him right now upsets me because it will mess him up all night which means no sleep for me. I skipped my morning nap today to get some damn laundry and Christmas shopping done and I've been paying for it all day long. I had anxiety before pregnancy, it went away, and I'm afraid it's back I also am terrified that one morning I will find my LO has died in his sleep it scares me so much. Sorry for the run on sentences I just can't think straight. I just need some good sleep when will this insanity get easier?!

Alid86 · December 2014

Hugs @goldngirl24‌ - I know exactly how you feel in regards to the sleep dilemma - I also have a 3 year old so napping is out and some days I don't know how I make it through! I just started talking to a councillor today and she said that around 2-3 months babies tend to start to be a bit more predictable and sleep a bit better and it gets easier ( I'm grasping at this hope!) my little guy doesn't sleep the best either and I get so stressed out when I try put him down to get supper made or spent time with DD and he wakes up and starts to cry

I just can't stand crying - it makes me very anxious and shaky!
Just wanted to tell you that your not alone! We will get through this

goldngirl24 · December 2014

Thank you for your reply. I'm sorry you're going through that too. It's hard but I know we are doing the best we can and our babies love us for it. My mom said all of our feelings are normal and we just need to take it a day at a time, it does get easier. Stay strong, momma. There's no shame in needing any help either!

esk75 · January 2015

So relieved to read this...My LO is 6 1/2 mo and I have had intermittent anxiety that something terrible is going to happen since his birth. I was disregarding them and for the most part could talk myself out of it...until last week, I noticed a spot on my hand (and immediately think its cancer) the anxiety seemed debilitating. With the holidays and family stuff I really tried to keep it in check, thats when I realized it's much more serious than I thought. I have an appointment with my Dr. next week to check my hand and I have a therapist (that I have not seen in a couple years). Im still breast feeding so I don't know if its safe to take anything or if I should seek therapy first...again Im so glad to read that I'm not alone, so much is talked about depression and I had no idea that these terrible thoughts and anxiety could also be a postpartum issue.

Alid86 · January 2015

Hugs @esk75‌. I am glad you are going to talk to your doctor about your anxiety! I'm breast feeding and went back on my medication a week after DS was born. There are meds that you can take while nursing. I double checked with my lactation consultant as well to make sure. Good luck and keep us posted.

highbornhunter · January 2015

Just wanted to offer some support and good thoughts for you ladies - I hope you all get the help you need and have someone to talk to, even if it's just your Bumpies. We had a speaker at my New Mommy Network group last Monday talk to us about PPD/PPA and it is so common, you are not alone.

Sending love your way!

:x

Jatpa003 · January 2015

So I am freaking out that I have an appointment with a psychiatrist this week and I know it's to be put on meds, but to be honest the thought of medication give me anxiety. How has it been working for any of you taking it? Is its effects immediate? Does it make you drowsy? Are there things I should be aware of?

Alid86 · January 2015

I'm on Effexor XR - takes a couple weeks to work and I may have to up my dose as I notice that while my anxiety had definitely lessened it's still there pretty intense some days so I'll have to talk to my dr about that. I'm still breast feeding and was given the ok by dr and lactation consultant if that worries you (not sure if you bf/ff)
As for side effects - I don't really notice many with this medication unless I miss a dose or am trying to wean myself off of it.
I know that it can be scary to take medication but trust your doctor. Feeling really anxious/depressed is so so hard! Please keep us posted.

Jatpa003 · January 2015

Thank you, yes I am bfing and my prescreening for seeing this Dr knows this. It worries me that I would pass any medication to my daughter or that it would make me drowsy as we bedshare (not willing to change either to take medication) I will keep you updated with more after my appointment.

bmoonstar · January 2015

I haven't been bumping much but this topic jumped out at me. It's so comforting to know that I'm not the only one facing anxiety issues. I had a lot of family in town and It sort of exacerbated the issue. The anxiety and panic is mostly due to my fears of going back to work and the baby not being ready for daycare. I've got a lot of support at home thank goodness. Love to all you ladies going through tough stuff.

Postpartum anxiety/depression - any one else going through this?

Re: Postpartum anxiety/depression - any one else going through this?

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