My dad is remarrying in a few months, and since my parents divorce (3ish years ago) I've been adamant that my children will only have two grandmas... so I need help brainstorming a honorary nickname for dad's new wife... if you're curious it was a nasty divorce for all involved (my sister and I included)
I hadn't even thought about this yet! I think I'll probably ask my stepmom what she'd like to be called and leave it at that to not hurt her feelings. On a side note, she has a friend who became a grandma in her 40's and decided to have her granddaughter call her "lady"
My daughters grandmother remarried and once he was legitimately family, I felt like he had outgrow "mr jones", so I asked him what he wanted the kids to call him. Well, we call him "big dawg" now. Lol. That's even how he signs all of his cards. His son? "little dawg"....obviously
Here's a different perspective: When my sister was pregnant my mom was very concerned with what my step-mother would be called. I told her that my niece will likely call them all what she calls them and my step-mother will likely be grandma too because the baby won't understand the complicated divorce history. Sure enough, my mom and step mom are both Grandma FirstName and the paternal gma is Grammy. It hasn't been an issue at all. And my niece has 3 grandmas who love her and spoil her. She's a lucky little girl.
Despite your own feelings, I know it took me a long time to forgive my dad and warm up to his wife, the new baby won't have all of that history. He/she will just know that these grand people love him/her. And will prob develop their own "names" for the grands. My dad wanted to be grandpa but niece calls him Papa FirstName. She came up with that on her own. I imagine my kid will follow suit since we all call him Papa now.
My kids call my mother in law's husband Gran-Den. His name is Denis. But if you put gran infront of the name it may work! Also, if this is the first step grand child for her, your LO may turn the name you chose into something else when he/she starts to talk.
can i play devils advocate here and give you a different side?
i totally see your point and you are very valid for wanting to find a different non traditional grandparent name...HOWEVER...as the step child, this becomes SOOOO CONFUSING...when let's say her biological children have children (assumign she has them). it caused my sister and i to grow up feeling very left out from the other side of the step family. why is she grandma to one but not to us when we have known her just as long and in some case we were "family" before the other grandkids were even thought of.
now that my mom has remarried, again, and all the kids are growing up together we just chose to go with the same name for this family so that the kids have all sets of grandparents to be loved on and love. it doesnt change their perspective at all, in fact they just know more ppl love them. i am not close with my second step dad at all, but he's great with my kids and to be frank, is the only grandfather they really have.
i dont know your story. and i do get a messy divorce..it sucks on all ends. a nickname would totally be cute. but there is an age at some point the kids will ask questions...my four year old already does.
good luck in finding the right solution for your family
thanks for the helpful ideas y'all... I'll end up asking FI what he thinks we should do and go from there, I'm thinking we'll see what LO wants to do and go from there
Re: Nicknames for step parents?
Mom to Lily and Colin!
Despite your own feelings, I know it took me a long time to forgive my dad and warm up to his wife, the new baby won't have all of that history. He/she will just know that these grand people love him/her. And will prob develop their own "names" for the grands. My dad wanted to be grandpa but niece calls him Papa FirstName. She came up with that on her own. I imagine my kid will follow suit since we all call him Papa now.