It's a gift from someone else to you not a rite of passage. You never throw your own, there are not exceptions. For all you know someone will offer after your anatomy scan, just give it time. However, if no one offers you one and you do decide to be tacky your guests won't tell you but silently judge you, because it comes across as gift grabby. Take that money you would spend on a shower and buy stuff for you child yourself.
I think it's up to your circle of friends. In my circle, mothers plan their own showers and they have showers for 2nd and 3rd babies. No one judges the mom or talks behind her back. We are all just happy about the baby and having an excuse to come party, drink, and eat. (and bring a gift)
And if you're close to your man's mother, she could help out.
You have plenty of time for someone to offer to throw you a shower. Most are in 3rd trimester. I know I didn't get an offer until a couple months from where you are in your pregnancy.
I think it's up to your circle of friends. In my circle, mothers plan their own showers and they have showers for 2nd and 3rd babies. No one judges the mom or talks behind her back. We are all just happy about the baby and having an excuse to come party, drink, and eat. (and bring a gift)
And if you're close to your man's mother, she could help out.
So you and all of your friends are cool with being rude and entitled... lovely. And, how do you know no one is talking behind anyone's back? Are you psychic?
Here's my opinion: Do whatever will make you happy.
Having a baby is an overwhelming situation and taxes many resources -- celebrating with friends or family and appreciating their generousity is not wrong. No one on here knows your situation and etiquette rules have evolved in all regards. You used to not pay for your own wedding...most people do nowadays. You used to NEVER invite men to a baby shower...now there's entire articles about coed showers (on The Bump, no less). Why not throw your baby a shower (because that's what it is -- it's a shower for your baby...not YOU) and celebrate. The people making these very black and white comments haven't been in your situation (whatever that may be) and may not understand what it's like to move around or not have a bestie or a sister (which also used to be frowned upon, FYI) to invest in a baby shower.
Good luck to you and congratulations!
Re: advice planning my own shower
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
First comes love, next comes marriage, then comes...
Lmao!
Mama to 2 girls - H&I
I think it's up to your circle of friends. In my circle, mothers plan their own showers and they have showers for 2nd and 3rd babies. No one judges the mom or talks behind her back. We are all just happy about the baby and having an excuse to come party, drink, and eat. (and bring a gift)
And if you're close to your man's mother, she could help out.
Married: October 23, 2010
DS: 8/7/2013
#2 EDD: 6/29/2016, C Section: 6/22/2016
Please don't throw your own shower. I think the PPs have explained why you shouldn't.
You're still really early in your pregnancy. Just be patient; one of your friends will probably offer to throw you a shower. Just give them a chance.
So you and all of your friends are cool with being rude and entitled... lovely. And, how do you know no one is talking behind anyone's back? Are you psychic?