I know I've been a PW lately, I'm sorry for post after post. It's just been such an excruciating difficult time and you ladies mean more to me than you'll ever know. How a group of women whom I have never met could mean SO much to me is incredible.
I had my D&C yesterday and it went well. OB said that the gestational sac and baby had already detached and I was on the road to miscarry in the next couple of days. This gave me comfort to know we made the right decision for D&C. The procedure went well and while I'm bleeding a little today, I feel back to my normal self. In fact, I'm enjoying a cup of coffee. I'm trying to find the bright side (as though there could be one) to not being pregnant anymore. I think I'll go have myself some sushi and wine in the next few days too!
As for next steps, I talked to the embryologist and she confirmed our fears that she doesn't think our final embryo will survive thaw since it's been frozen twice using slow-freeze methods. So that being said, I feel strongly that our next step will be to find more embryos. This is scary because it's really hard to do, but I feel confident I will some way some how. I may put my feelers out on my blog asking if any of my readers have any that they don't know what to do with, and maybe (if I get enough guts) I might kindly ask on SAIF too. We want more than one child in the long run anyway so it feels like the right thing to do to find more now.
We aren't going to do any "products of conception" miscarriage testing (ugh i hate that term). I did a lot of thinking about what you ladies said and I feel comfortable just letting it be. Although my RE wants me to do some autoimmune testing since there are some questionable aspects of my health that might point to autoimmune. I don't know anything about any of it.
And lastly, we planted a beautiful "Little Gem Magnolia" tree in our yard with a perfect little sleeping angel baby statue below it. I always felt like the baby was a girl so I've named her Magnolia (or baby Maggie) and that's brought me enormous amount of comfort thinking of her as a real person that did exist and will always exist in my heart. I put a picture of the tree and statue on my blog.
So that's it for me for now. I'll catch up on all the posts from yesterday but I hope everyone is doing okay. Thank you for thinking of me and the kind words, as always.
Re: My update ***m/c mentioned**
***signature & ticker warning***
Me: 30 ~ Stage IV Endo ~ AMH .38 ~ AFC 8
AMH .97 as of 4/2012! ~ AMH 1.63 as of 4/2013!?!
Him: 29 ~ perfect swimmers
Laparotomy w/partial oophorectomy 8/2009 to remove cysts/endo.
Stopped BCP 4/2010.
Multiple clomid rounds from 11/2010 to 6/2011. ~ All BFN
IUI w/clomid 7/2011. IUI w/clomid & injectables 11/2011 & 1/2012. ~ All BFN
IVF:EPP 5/2012 ~ (4R, 3M, 2F w/ICSI). Both embryos txfrd. ~ BFN
BCP to manage endo from 10/2012 to 12/2012.
FET w/donor embryos #1: 10/2013 Cancelled
FET w/donor embryos #1.2: 11/2013 ~ ET of 2 beautiful blasts on 11/27.
Beta 1: 503(12dp5dt) Beta 2: 1035(14dpt) Beta 3: 3001(16dpt) Beta 4: 8503(19dpt)
Twins with an EDD of 8/15/14! Team Purple
G&B born 6/30/14 at 33w3d via emergency c/s.
If you're wondering about my avatar...it's a fried pickle chip shaped like a fetus!
3 failed IVF with OE and 2 failed frozen DE cycles
Last fresh hail mary DE cycle starting Feb 2013
PAIF/SAIF always welcome
************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
DH: Severe MFI
12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN
8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)
My ovaries are just for decoration
12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts.
2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.
6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d.
11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522 Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373
6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!
Snowflake baby is a girl!
Our beautiful Snowflake girl arrived on July 22, 2014!
My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
thinking of you and yh.
we are here for you as you process what has happened and as you are able to move forward!
Praying unceasingly for a miracle. ALL welcome!
Me:29 DH:29 TTC since 1/11 Dx: unexplained IF/early DOR/immune issues
8/30IVF#1 Antagonist protocol- ER 9/11-8R, 7M, 5F.
IVF#2 Antagonist protocol plus baby aspirin- ER 12/5-16R, 12M, 8F!
ET 12/10 5dt! 1 fully expanded blast & 1 early blast. No frosties. BFN
3/13 hysteroscopy & polypectomy, Consulted w Dr. Kwak-Kim.
ER 7/19 14R, 11M, 9F(4 natural fert, 5 with ICSI)
ET 5dt 7/24 2 fully expanded blasts. SURPRISE 3 FROSTIES!!!
Beta #1 8/2 335!!!! Beta #2 829!!! 1st u/s 8/14 showed TWINS!!!!!
3/21/14-L&W born at 37w via csection
Here Comes the Sun Blog
PAIF/SAIF welcome!
It seems like you're doing your best to grieve and confront your loss, and I agree that planting a tree is a wonderful thing to do.
Sending you hugs and all my best wishes.
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Married June 2011 Dx: anovulatory due to prolactinoma (1.5cmx 1.5cm in 2006)
April 2012: MRI- questionable cyst 8mg by 12mm in pituitary ; referred to RE by Ob-gyn after amenorrhea x 4+ months, provera ineffective, low estrogen level
cycle 1: May 2012, clomid 50mg; cycle cancelled, thin lining, no response
cycle 2: June 2012, femara 5mg; cycle cancelled, no response
cycle 3: July 2012, femara 7.5mg; cycle cancelled (largest folli on Cd12 & cd 16: 11, lining 4)
Repeat MRI July 25,2012- Cyst unchanged, likely old infarction.
Aug. 8: met with RE, move to injectables if HSG and SA normal
Aug. 23: HSG all clear; DH- perfect
Switched to a new RE in early Sept. IVF here we come
Genetic testing reveals: Fragile X- Intermediate risk/grey zone.
IVF#1: ER 11/30: 14 retrieved, 10 mature, 7 fertilized. E2 prior to trigger 5200. Decision made to freeze 6 embryos and transfer later due to OHSS.
IVF#1.2/FET #1: estrogen injects start 1/18, FET delayed to try to thicken lining. lining 5.4mm. FET- 2/18- transferred one 3AA expanded blast. BFP 5dp5dt. Beta #1- 2/27 9dp5dt- 102.27 beta #2 3/1: 147 , beta #3 3/4: 268 told to stop meds and let nature take its course. requested 4th beta (3/6); Beta hell for 2 months.
FET # 2: endometrial scratch 5/6, added estrace vaginally and ASA to delestrogen and PIO. June 10- transferred one 4AA hatched embryo, BFP 4dp6dt, Beta 1 (9dp6dt) 187, Beta 2 (11dp6dt): 412; Beta 3 (15dp6dt ): 4452. U/S #1- one beautiful embryo with a heartbeat of 133 at 7 weeks. 8 weeks: heartbeat 156. EDD 2/26/2014: born 2-3-14 induced due to Pre-E and HELLP at 36w5d.
12/1: met with RE to discuss trying for #2
Anovulatory cycles, increased Synthroid Diagnosed Sep 2010
1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011
Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks
1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks
Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone)
IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone)
Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells
Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone)
Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
Jan 2013 BFP
Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin
Miracle Born August 2013 Premature
Yours doesn't have to be a sad story
3/22 ER: 25R, 20M, 15F. 9 genetically normal, and 3 survived to Day 5
3/27 ET: transferred 1 embryo, beta 9dp5dt=163, 12dp5dt=639
4/25 1st ultrasound at 7 weeks = identical twins with heartbeats?!!!
10/11: after 2 years, saw a RE, FSH 5.4
11/11: BFP! (surprise after thyroid & normal hsg),
12/11: missed m/c after 7 week u/s, 1/12: D&C
6/12 IUI#1-IUI #3: clomid = BFP!, C/P
IVF #1(10/12) FSH 5.4, AFC: 16 long Lupron, 5R/5M/4F, all 4 made it to 5dt, 1 blast/1-8 cell transferred=BFN
IVF #2(12/12)AFC 21, MD lupron, 4R/4M/3F, 5dt of 1 blast and 2-8cell. BFN.
IVF#3(4/13) Natural start antagon protocol, 12R,11F. one PGS normal at day 6 transfer. BFN.
IVF#4 (11/13) C.CRM (ODW.U normal 8/13 Still no Diagnosis) EPP/antagonist. ER 13R/7M/6F. Only 1 made it to freeze. Abnormal. Looking into options of DE, Fresh vs frozen.
10/14 new local RE to look into what's next. CD3 FSH 4.7, AMH 0.9. Met with DE agencies and exploring options for feb/march 2015.
Surprise natural bfp (4 days before donor is signed). Beta #1 at 9dpo: 51.8, 2nd beta: 195 (25 hours doubling) @11dpo. 3rd beta (12/15): 516 (35 hrs doubling) 4th beta(12/17): 895 (58 hours doubling) 5th beta(12/19): 2120. U/S at 5w0d(12/22): one gestational sac with yolk sac. U/S #2 (6w0d)12/29. One little bean measuring 6w0d with HR 124. 3rd u/s(1/4)7w0d: baby measuring 7w2d. HR 134. 3/30: A/S at MFM went great except for low lying placenta. Verifi results are normal! Team Blue! Please send any positive thoughts our way! EDD:8/24/2015
Baby Will born 8/18. He's perfect.
Updated....I emailed you.
************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
DH: Severe MFI
12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN
8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)
My ovaries are just for decoration
12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts.
2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.
6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d.
11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522 Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373
6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!
Snowflake baby is a girl!
Our beautiful Snowflake girl arrived on July 22, 2014!
My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake