How do you deal?

mjester1 · March 2013

How do you deal with people asking how your baby is? The baby that's now gone. Sometimes I don't know how to respond. Next time ill know better than to tell before 13 weeks.

dragonfly711 · March 2013

Most people I told that I had a miscarriage. So everyone has been very supportive. Who ever we told I told right away So they don't ask.

mjester1 · March 2013

hlmlvt:
Most people I told that I had a miscarriage. So everyone has been very supportive. Who ever we told I told right away So they don't ask.[/quote

I told a coworker and then it spread like wild fire so now everyone including customers ask me about it constantly.

mjester1 · March 2013

RN536:
hlmlvt:
Most people I told that I had a miscarriage. So everyone has been very supportive. Who ever we told I told right away So they don't ask.

Same here. We only told close family and then told them about the miscarriage so no one asks. So sorry for your loss

So sorry for both of you ladies

dragonfly711 · March 2013

mjester1:
hlmlvt:
Most people I told that I had a miscarriage. So everyone has been very supportive. Who ever we told I told right away So they don't ask.[/quote

I told a coworker and then it spread like wild fire so now everyone including customers ask me about it constantly.

I work at a private school everyone has been so supportive. The teacher I work w only told the parents if they asked. We did not tell my students.
I called my teacher and had her tell everyone at work. I did not want to get there tommorow and have all kinds of questions. But I have had emails texts all thinking about me and telling me to take whatever time I needed a few even shared their stories of having miscarriages. Will be easier going back to work.

Avion22 · March 2013

Everyone I worked with knew I was pregnant (due to a hazardous job I had to move to different duties during pregnancy, so it was obvious). I think most people realized something was wrong when I didn't come in for a week. Also, some friends at work tried to spread the word so nobody would say anything awkward. It really helped.

Otherwise, there were a few people who didn't know about the m/c and asked about the baby....we responded with, "Unfortunately the baby's heart stopped beating, and I miscarried." It was really hard, but you have to say it....once it's over though, I think it's not too bad.

The hardest for me was when people asked, "How are you feeling?" and I didn't know if they were asking about the pregnancy (and didn't know about the m/c), or if they were asking about the m/c. That's the one downfall with having other people spread the word....you don't entirely know who knows and who doesn't.

jhs121 · March 2013

My hubby and I had the same idea. We figured it's difficult for us to say it. It's probably awkward for them when they ask excitedly and then realize there's no more baby. So we chose to tell everyone right away, especially since we had just told all the family the good news. We told them by face, phone, text or email. My thoughts were I'd hate for someone to ask me a month from now and then have to tell them actually we lost him a month ago. They feel dumb but there's no way they would know. Best just to get it out there right away. We are looking forward to the next step of this baby making journey! God has a plan and we know it's better than ours. Hope you have comfort soon. Praying for you.

How do you deal?

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