KC, my issue when people say staying home is harder I wonder why they don't go back to work. NOTE: I understand that daycare may be too expensive for them to work or other special circumstances.
Generally I don't get why people get into a pissing match about how hard their life is when they made the choice to stay home. If it was so hard to stay home I'd be back at work. I'm home because I know it would be much harder to work.
It's tough to be a parent. Fact! For me, and I think much of the world, it's harder to go to work 9 hours a day, come home at 6 o'clock which is notoriously a bad time of day for small kids, try to feed them, bath them, get quality time in, put them to bed, clean up and get packed up after they go to bed, all while getting yourself to sleep at a reasonable hour.
That schedule doesn't appeal to me. I did it for a very short period of time before I said forget this and decided to stay home again.
That's not saying staying home isn't hard. Doesn't mean there aren't days I vent here about how tough things are. Doesn't mean I'm not throwing my kid at my husband as soon as he walks in the door some days. Like I said, being a parent is hard. I just rather not deal w the extra stress if working.
its harder but more enjoyable.
i think marriage is hard work...do you suppose I should get divorced since I don't think it's easy?
KC, my issue when people say staying home is harder I wonder why they don't go back to work. NOTE: I understand that daycare may be too expensive for them to work or other special circumstances.
I don't see how this is really a valid unit of measure. Do you make every choice you do in life because it's the path of least resistance? I'm not saying one is harder than the other, but to say that people SAH simply because it's easier otherwise they would be working doesn't really make sense. People do plenty of things that are "harder" because they believe it's the best thing for them to do. Exercise comes to mind. Why don't I go straight to fat? It's easier. I probably shouldn't complain about eating right or exercising because if I really thought it was harder than not doing it I would just be fat and happy. See?
And yeah, I completely stand by the theory that all things being equal, someone working 9-5 plus a commute (like a normal working mom without the chef and hosuekeeper) is most likely rolling her eyes, hard, at the SAHM with the typical situation saying how much more difficult her lyfe is.
Maybe I have too many friends doing the high powered career thing -- that shiit just is not story time and crock pot meals. Even without the cleaning.
lol, please inform me what the typical situation is.
I know people will get all "staying home is the hardest job in the world" but whatever. For me it was no contest.
I left a difficult, stressful job with travel responsibilities for a part time one in a more family friendly environment. I have two and half days a week to do the SAHM thing. We doing outings, and I knock out some errands which helps make our weekends less stressful.
The days I work, my mom watches our kids at our house. It does not get less stressful than that.
All of that being said, I never signed up to be June Cleaver. I wasn't promising DH a spotless home and gourmet meals. So I never really felt that pressure.
Overall, our quality of life has improved, and that was what i was looking for.
Also, I remember your post on WM about moving closer to your DH's job. Something has got to give -- you guys are running yourselves ragged!
This is me exactly, except I work from home so my kids go to a preschool about 10 minutes away 2 days and then my mom watches them for a half day on Fridays. Everything about staying home is easier for me. Yes, there are challenges that I didn't deal with before, but compared to working, travelling and juggling two demanding careers, it is a dream.
If my marriage was harder work than being single, I would be single.
My relationship with my husband is a million times easier than my other relationships, hence one of the reason I married him and not the other tools I dated.
Yeah, maybe it's different for me but I think my life would be monumentally easier if I were living in my parents basement with no kids and no dh. I could come and go as I please, sleep as late as I want,etc. my relationship with my dh may be easier than if I married the wrong person, but it doesn't make marriage an easy thing to do. It's work to stay happily married throughout the course of ones lifetime because life is difficult and people change with time.
saying something is hard doesn't mean you don't love and appreciate it any less. I also wouldn't trade this opportunity for anything regardless of the fact I don't find it to be an easy lifestyle. I thought being pregnant was pretty hard but that doesn't mean I didn't feel grateful for the opportunity. Most things that are satisfying in life are challenging.
And yeah, I completely stand by the theory that all things being equal, someone working 9-5 plus a commute (like a normal working mom without the chef and hosuekeeper) is most likely rolling her eyes, hard, at the SAHM with the typical situation saying how much more difficult her lyfe is.
Maybe I have too many friends doing the high powered career thing -- that shiit just is not story time and crock pot meals. Even without the cleaning.
also, I've never met a mom in a high powered career thing that didn't have luxuries that made her life easier than say a sahm who's living on a budget.
i just think its kind of foolish to say this because there's no typical situation. I think my friend with 5 kids all under the age of seven has it tougher than my friend with a good paying gig and a nanny who picks up her house/takes care of her kid while she works and that job allows her lots of leisure travel. There's no typical situation. There's too many factors to say universally one is more difficult than the other.
If my marriage was harder work than being single, I would be single.
My relationship with my husband is a million times easier than my other relationships, hence one of the reason I married him and not the other tools I dated.
Yeah, maybe it's different for me but I think my life would be monumentally easier if I were living in my parents basement with no kids and no dh. I could come and go as I please, sleep as late as I want,etc. my relationship with my dh may be easier than if I married the wrong person, but it doesn't make marriage an easy thing to do. It's work to stay happily married throughout the course of ones lifetime because life is difficult and people change with time.
saying something is hard doesn't mean you don't love and appreciate it any less. I thought being pregnant was pretty hard but that doesn't mean I didn't feel grateful for the opportunity. Most things that are satisfying in life are challenging.
I dont think my life would be easier if i lived in my parents basement. The tine dh and i had before kids was a breeze. i seriously dont remember a hard part about it. Making a healthy relationship takes work but I don't consider it hard. It's just like any other relationship. Are relationships work, yes, but hard, no way. If my friendships were hard I'd drop my friends too. Maybe I do always take the path of least resistances, lol.
You knows what's stressful to me? Dating! That flipping sucked.
I get where you are coming from KC. I do. I just don't think work equals hard.
i don't consider it hard a as a whole (though particular times can be really hard depending on circumstances with either marriage or kids) but I think being married is harder than being single and I think life is harder with kids than it would be without.
Re: If you went from WM to SAHM
its harder but more enjoyable.
i think marriage is hard work...do you suppose I should get divorced since I don't think it's easy?
I don't see how this is really a valid unit of measure. Do you make every choice you do in life because it's the path of least resistance? I'm not saying one is harder than the other, but to say that people SAH simply because it's easier otherwise they would be working doesn't really make sense. People do plenty of things that are "harder" because they believe it's the best thing for them to do. Exercise comes to mind. Why don't I go straight to fat? It's easier. I probably shouldn't complain about eating right or exercising because if I really thought it was harder than not doing it I would just be fat and happy. See?
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lol, please inform me what the typical situation is.
This is me exactly, except I work from home so my kids go to a preschool about 10 minutes away 2 days and then my mom watches them for a half day on Fridays. Everything about staying home is easier for me. Yes, there are challenges that I didn't deal with before, but compared to working, travelling and juggling two demanding careers, it is a dream.
Yeah, maybe it's different for me but I think my life would be monumentally easier if I were living in my parents basement with no kids and no dh. I could come and go as I please, sleep as late as I want,etc. my relationship with my dh may be easier than if I married the wrong person, but it doesn't make marriage an easy thing to do. It's work to stay happily married throughout the course of ones lifetime because life is difficult and people change with time.
saying something is hard doesn't mean you don't love and appreciate it any less. I also wouldn't trade this opportunity for anything regardless of the fact I don't find it to be an easy lifestyle. I thought being pregnant was pretty hard but that doesn't mean I didn't feel grateful for the opportunity. Most things that are satisfying in life are challenging.
also, I've never met a mom in a high powered career thing that didn't have luxuries that made her life easier than say a sahm who's living on a budget.
i just think its kind of foolish to say this because there's no typical situation. I think my friend with 5 kids all under the age of seven has it tougher than my friend with a good paying gig and a nanny who picks up her house/takes care of her kid while she works and that job allows her lots of leisure travel. There's no typical situation. There's too many factors to say universally one is more difficult than the other.
i don't consider it hard a as a whole (though particular times can be really hard depending on circumstances with either marriage or kids) but I think being married is harder than being single and I think life is harder with kids than it would be without.