Stay at Home Moms

What were your marriage requirements?

I could not think of a better way to word this. When it came to the type of man you choose to marry? What were your must haves? What were your deal breakers?
Mom to Emma 9/4/06 and Jackson 11/24/08 M/C Dec 11 and M/C twins feb 2012. BFP Thanksgiving! EDD Aug 4, 2013 M/C at 5 weeks.

Re: What were your marriage requirements?

  • Requirements were a job/good work ethic, be a mature adult and childless.  Smart and a love of travel.  Deal breakers -debt, child like behavior, workaholic or any very time consuming hobby that they were obsessed with.
    TTC since September '08 After 2 m/c - lap for stage 3-4 endo Oct '09 Bravelle w/Ovidrel trigger - iui on 11/07 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I started dating the boy who would eventually become my DH when I was 14 (one day from 15) and he was 16 (three weeks from 17).  So, at that point, marriage was the farthest thing from my mind.  We stayed together through college at UVA, and

    SAHM to Eli, born 11.26.11
  • I never had a list of requirements, but in retrospect I suppose the most important thing was mutual respect. I also wanted a man who worked hard for whatever he wanted in life. And who worked hard for me. And I wanted a man who respected women. And a man
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  • That I was in love with him, and I knew he loved me.  That's it.
  • I started dating DH the fall of my freshman year of college, so I wasn't dating as a 20something, working, college grad. 

    What I "required" was: an intelligent, motivated, realistic, funny, christian, kind, respectful, family-oriented, trave

    E 09.08, V 08.11, J 04.11
  • Well, I don't know that I sat down and made a list, but comparing DH, who is pretty much exactly what I want for a H, with the other schmucks I dated:

    Must haves: supportive, funny, appropriately behaved in social and one-on-one settings, takes r

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  • He had to be a Christian and hard worker. He had to be mature. There were a lot of obnoxious "drive through the drive through backwards" kind of guys my sister dated. I was not going to marry one of those. He had to be respectful to me and other women

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  • Must haves were someone big on family and wanted kids, respectful, dependable, ethical and who treats me as a 100% equal partner.

    Less important, but still important, was being reasonably ambitious, someone who takes care of their things, and ca

    Owen (March 2007), Caleb (July 2009), Eliza (July 2011) and August (September 2013)

  • Someone who doesn't need a mother.

    Someone who is much of a sarcastic *** as me.

    Done done.
  • Wants kids, cares about health/fitness, and the sex had to be good.

    Deal breakers would be someone who didn't want kids, abusive...aside from that I don't really know.

    I always thought I'd never marry anyone who didn't love to read as much

    Larry photo: Larry Sneaky touches gifLarrysneakytouch.gif 
    DS born 3.12 
    DD born 7.14
  • This question is so fitting for today LOL

    I have a revision to mine:

    *Once, just once, side w/ me instead of MIL, I AM YOUR WIFE ; )


    Our miracle IVF baby - D 6/09 & J - Surprise! born 9/10!!!
  • Requirements - Kind, passionate/driven, succesful (I don't mean this in terms of making $, I mean this in terms of an ability to succeed and be happy with whatever his passion is, you know?), loves to travel, accepting, thinks I am the bees knees even

    Henry 4.23.2007 Elliot 3.30.2012


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  • I wanted somebody I was attracted* to and would make a good father. Somebody I could have fun with and depend on. Oh and couldn't be a Republican or an Auburn fan.

    ***The type of man I am attracted eyes, dark hair, loves sports {footbal

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    There is another kid, she's 10... 
  • I didn't ever pursue marriage. I always envisioned life single. I was terrible at dating. Only after I'd been with DH did I realize I wanted to marry him.

    Still, when it came to dating I had zero tolerance for disres

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  • DH and I started dating when I was 17 and he was 18. Within that first year two horrible and traumatic events happened to me. He stood by me throughout it all and was so strong for me to lean on and supportive. I knew then that he would never leave me and


  • I had very high standards because I wasn't going to just settle. I wanted to choose wisely. Good work ethic/job, same religion as me, would be supportive of me quitting my very good paying job to become a sahm once we had children, respectful towar

  • Someone who was driven and had a career and an education.

    Someone who could make me laugh.

    Someone who could provide a life of security.

    Someone who respected me. 

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  • I wanted someone motivated, who respects me and who loves children. The only true deal breakers were a bad temper and lack of patience...I fully admit that I'm a handful, so those things wouldn't have worked.
    "And though she be but little, she is fierce."
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  • Things that attracted to me to my SO:

    Good with kids.  Happy with his job situation.  Good family. Attractive.

    I was married before and those were the things my ex-H was not. 

  • DH and I met when we were in our early 30's, so I had lots of time and bad dates  to figure out what I wanted and what I didn't want.  I knew that to be in a successful long term relationship/marriage, I had to be with someone with a sense of

  • I never had a 'list'. In fact, I had a terrible 3 yr long relationship with a bipolar guy who repeatedly stole money from me, had no car, couldn't keep a job, and had a terrible relationship with his family. When I finally ditched him I was VERY single fo
    G: 5/8/11
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    having a baby on Christmas!

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  • image amy052006:

    Since its UO opinion day...

    I don't get writing off a guy with a child, provided he is being a good, responsi

  • Must haves: Intelligent, funny, easy to talk to. Similar political and religious beliefs. Similar views on money. Similar views on future family. Steady employment history. I preferred someone who didn't already have kids but that wasn't a automatic de


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  • image seans_grl:
    image amy052006:<
    TTC since September '08 After 2 m/c - lap for stage 3-4 endo Oct '09 Bravelle w/Ovidrel trigger - iui on 11/07 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • image amy052006:

    Since its UO opinion day...

    I don't get writing off a guy with a child, provided he is being a good, responsi

    Ms. A  - 2007, Mr. C - 2009
  • ta78ta78
    250 Answers 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 25 Love Its

    I don't know if I ever had a list. I wanted someone who was kind and funny, good looking, close w his family and got along w mine, and laid back/easy going. Also someone who was supportive, liked my friends, and had ambition.

    I was in a terrible

    Quinton  06.25.10
    Wren  01.13.11

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  • Intelligent, kind, respectful, hard working, good sense of humor, wanted children, non-smoker.
    Ms. A  - 2007, Mr. C - 2009
  • I don't think I had a set list of requirements in mind. I met DH in middle school and we were high school sweethearts so it's not really something I was consciously thinking about.

    That said, I certainly wouldn't have stuck wi

    PCOS Dx 12.08 / BFP! 4.22.10 DS1 born 1.4.11 DS2 born 6.19.13
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  • I would say my top factors were:

    Motivated in a career path. We were still in college when we decided to get married, but he was completing a degree in engineering so I knew he cared about his future career.

    Sense of humor. I can't stand pe

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  • I expected a good relationship with mutual respect and loyalty...similar interests and goals for the future. Deal breakers would have been any serious vices like smoking or substance abuse... someone who was violent or seemed like a frequent liar.

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