I thought about doing this about 20 times in the last 5 weeks but I think it's finally time. I need to step away from this board for a while. At least a week, maybe a few months. I might still be on The Bump, on the IF or TTCAL boards, but I can't be here right now. The number of pregnant women here right now is crazy -- coming here is like walking into an OB's waiting room to chat with all the patients. I wouldn't torture myself like that in real life and it's time to stop doing it online.
I consider it major progress that I am no longer sad all the time, but most of my sadness has been replaced by anger. And since there's really no one responsible for my miscarriage, I'm angry at pregnant women for having what I don't have. I would love to be happy for you all, but I can't be right now. I'm mad every time you post about your pregnancies. I'm mad that it took you all less time than it's taken me, and that most of you haven't gone through a miscarriage to boot. I'm mad every time you hit a milestone I never made it to. This isn't healthy for me and it's not fair to you.
Some of you know how to find me if you want me. I hope to see the rest of you when I'm feeling more like a human being. Good luck to everyone.