Hey all, while I'm working on mentally and physically preparing for the pain of contractions, I find myself (as an FTM) really freaking out about tearing. I'm not sure why this scares me more than anything else, but it does. As such, I'd like to hear from STMs: did you tear? How bad? Was it a big deal to you or did you not really care? Did you find that any of the recommended techniques (perineal massage, compresses, certain positions, etc.) for avoiding a tear worked for you or not? Did you get an epi to avoid a worse tear? How painful was it and did it affect sex later? Any insight is helpful.
Thanks in advance and sorry if I'm being a wuss!