I'm nearly 19 weeks pregnant with my first child, and have decided (after much research and consideration) to attempt an at-home water birth. I quickly realized that sharing this idea with anyone is a bad idea, and so I only volunteer this information now when EXPRESSLY asked what my plans are for my delivery.
That being said, I have never in my life been subjected to so many gruesome birth stories as I have been in the past few months.
"My second daughter broke my hip on the way out."
"My baby would've died if I hadn't been in the hospital."
Firefighter/Paramedic Friend: "I ran a call on a stillbirth caused by an at-home water birth. It was the midwife's fault. You can't trust those people."
"You know you can bleed to death in under five minutes. There will be no saving you if you hemorrhage at home."
The list goes on and on, and I have no idea how to politely tell people to stop telling me these stories. I have no doubt that what I am doing is safe as long as my pregnancy remains low-risk, but I honest to God can't help letting these thoughts into my head and I'm afraid they'll have a negative effect on my birthing process. (Adrenaline and fear are no good when trying to dilate, so I hear).
Have any of you experienced these types of horror stories? How did you get people to stop?
Re: Horror Stories
Also, keep in mind that a lot of those "horror stories" are women working through their own stressful birth experiences. After I had my son, I had to keep reminding myself to not tell pregnant friends about my own birth "horror story." And as someone who wanted an intervention-free birth, I of all people should have known better!
Finally, during my pregnancy with my daughter, I had a birth horror story playing in my head the entire 9 months - my own experience delivering my son! I too worried about whether this would affect my daughter's birth, but there's no getting away from it when it's your own experience, YKWIM? Turned out I had a quick, un-medicated, very positive birth with my daughter. Even though I was thinking about that bad experience, even during labor, it didn't affect her birth.
BFP#2: EDD 2/11/14, MMC confirmed 7/15/13 (growth stopped at 6 weeks), D&C @ 12 weeks 7/25/13
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
Judith Rooks's initial report to the Oregon legislature showed a total mortality rate for planned OOH births at 4.5 per 1000. For planned OOH births with direct-entry midwives, the mortality rate was 4.8 per 1000. Deaths due to congenital abnormalities are excluded from the data. The total term intrapartum plus neonatal death rate for planned hospital births was 0.6 per 1000. I have read other data from the report that indicates a high percentage of the babies who died in planned OOH births should have been risked out due to presentation or maternal health according to ACOG guidelines. I live in Oregon and have followed the homebirth/OOH birth issues for a few years. I considered at one time giving birth in an accredited birth center - changed my mind and would have been risked out anyway. I changed my mind after hearing a horror story on the news and reading about it in the newspaper.
You have an absolute right to make whatever decision you wish regarding the birth of your child and that is a decision that should remain between you, your husband, and your healthcare provider. You don't need to share it with anyone. But it should be an informed decision, and I think there is a sufficient and growing body of evidence that calls into question the safety of OOH births relative to hospital births. The overall risks are still very low, for sure. Only you can decide what to do with that information.
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B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
You're absolutely right that what complicates the picture is that some midwives/birth attendants will not strictly follow the guidelines for homebirth. Part of the reason for that is that homebirth and those midwives are not well integrated into the health care system. Unfortunately, what I have seen of the homebirth community is that these identified risk factors are believed to not be issues at all. One of the homebirth deaths in my community involved a midwife who agreed to deliver a breech baby. In a state like Oregon, you can have midwives with ZERO medical training or knowledge, and a mere high school diploma, having to evaluate these conditions and risks, and doing so in a culture that denies that these conditions are risks at all. But the homebirth/natural birth community tends to oppose strict licensing and insurance requirements that might actually protect women.
Unfortunately, I think that even in countries with an integrated health care system, strict educational and licensing requirements, and stringent risk management, home birth still has poorer outcomes than hospital birth. Yes, even in The Netherlands.
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