~~~ttcal newbie check-in (tuesday, april 22)~~~

meladoriestar

Welcome to TTC After Loss. I'm so sorry for your loss but am happy you have found us. ((hugs)) This board is full of brilliant and kind women who have experienced the hardship of losing that which is most precious, and I hope you find great comfort and support here in your journey!

For those of you so new that you don't know the routine, this is a check-in for newer members of the TTCAL Board. Please feel free to use this space to ask those "newbie" questions that feel intimidating to ask on the main board and I will try my best to get you an answer.

**Please don't feel that you have to provide individual feedback to all of the posters ahead of you. Many do and it's great, but it's most definitely not required to be a part of this check-in. I'd just hate to think people might feel intimidated and not post because of this. All posts and responses are welcomed!

Please take the time to read the TTCAL blog to answer any questions you may have regarding our board etiquette, TTC, miscarriage & loss, and much more: https://ttcalblog.wordpress.com/ If you are a check-in regular and get a BFP, please PM me so that I can add it to the weekly check-in with a warning for other members.

Finally, if you haven't done so, please post your introduction on the main board including your story.

Weekly Update:  How are you doing?  Post an update including any news, thoughts, or questions - let me know how things are going for you! If you don’t see your name, it’s only because you didn’t check in last week.

loveinkw13: Did you end up getting another BBT? I see you haven’t been temping this cycle.

VesperLynch: How are you feeling? Hope you got rid of that infection!

AggieBeth06: How was the massage? When is your appointment with the high-risk OB?

MoreThanSparrows08: ((hugs)) I’m sorry about CD1. How are you doing?

longcat07: How are you doing? Have you had a chance to get outside and do some gardening? Did you decide about finding a new doctor?

qanda2013: How are you doing this week? Are you feeling less emotional?

aubrygarfield: How’s temping going?

km380: Has this week been any easier than last week? How are you doing?

LauraO11: I saw your post about your bleeding. Did you get a call into your OB? How is the bleeding?

jcar2: Have you had your betas done this week yet? Where are they at?

polevaultRN: Did you ever get a positive OPK?

tfno2: Have you had any more bleeding? How has your week back at work been?

meredithcarole: How have things been since your upsetting day last week? How’s your cramping?

chicagojackie: Did AF ever show?

buttercup509: Has your schedule gotten less crazy yet?

akleng: Good luck with your appointment! Let us know how it goes.

kj808: How is everything going? Are you feeling less upset about AF having come?

MelissaL121: Has AF come yet? Have you started temping?

yellowcat10: How did the testing yesterday go?

Question of the Week: What band or musician can you really listen to – who makes you stop what you’re doing just to enjoy the music?

polevaultRN

Hi @meladoriestar! Thanks for the check-in. How are you this week?

I finally got a +OPK. I tested Friday at 1:00pm and it looked about as dark as the control line, but I tested again at 8:00pm and it was definitely positive! The next day at 1:00pm, I got a negative. I haven't tested since then, but should I keep testing? I dunno if I for sure ovulated since I don't temp, but I had a lot of EWCM on Friday, too. So we HIO ED from Thursday-Sunday! I'm planning to test on May 1 which would be 12 DPO or May 4 (15 DPO). We'll see

QOTW: I love country music. My favorites right now are Blake Shelton and Luke Bryan!

ETA: words

MoreThanSparrows08

@meladoriestar‌ thanks for the check in! How are you doing?

Im feeling ok. I knew AF was coming, so it wasn't a big surprise. Just morr of an annoyance...

Right at this moment, I am irrationally upsrt with DH. I had planned on going running tomorrow morning with a friend - she's been asking me to go with her and she's planning on running a 5k soon snd wanted some extra motivation, and I haven't exercised in more than 3 weeks - and he waits until 10:30 tonight to tell me (more like remind me) he's leaving early for his men's Bible study group (it used to be on Thursday's but it recently got moved to Tuesday's and it didnt even cross my mind as I was making my own plans) I can't decide if I'm more upset at myself for not remembering or at DH for not saying something sooner.

QOTW: Love country music, but lately I've been listening to Imagine Dragons, Bastille, and Avicci (among others) I have a very eclectic taste in music and I tend to go back and forth between genres as the music changes.

Buttercup509

Thanks for the check in @meladoriestar! How are you?

Things have finally calmed down around here. Our appointment with the genetic counselor is Wednesday afternoon, and I'm a little nervous about it. I'm really hoping for good news, but I'm trying to prepare for the worst. I'm looking forward to this weekend though! I'm getting a massage Friday night, having lunch and pedicures with a good friend on Saturday, and out with H on Sunday.

QOTW: This is probably weird, but oh well. I haven't been avoiding music lately, but I haven't really paid much attention to it either. Music can be very emotional for me, and I guess I haven't wanted any extra emotions. I will always pay attention to Chopin. I'm a sucker for classical music, even though I think it's incredibly emotional. I don't think that made much sense, but there it is!

@polevaultRN FX for you this cycle!

@MoreThanSparrows08 (((hugs)))

nola219

This week has been emotionally and hormonally hard. Passed tissue from m/c and started AF today. A bittersweet reminder about the loss of my 1st pregnancy.

I am also dealing with a bad case of Strep Throat and have been extra miserable over the last few days.

My SIL drama continues as well as my detest for her and all the immature life choices she makes. She continues to neglect her children to support her H who is a meth head and convicted meth dealer and cooker! She wastes her money on him and trying to keep him out of jail, meanwhile her kids are wearing shoes that don't fit. She has no income yet has money to pay a lawyer for her H. He's Guilty! The cops found him in your garage cooking meth red handed!! I need to start a blog on the stupid shit my SIL says and does. Maybe this should go on the TP board

meredithcarole

Good morning @meladoriestar‌! Hope all is well with you. My week has been pretty good. It is certainly better than the rough patch last week. My cramps/pains went away when AF did (last Friday) but then I got some random cramps tonight suddenly with a little spotting? It may be related to having intercourse last night. I certainly hope I am not going to actually bleed again (I am kind of over that for the moment). QOTW: I listen to all kinds of rock. I can always listen to the Beatles, Eric Clapton, The Stones, Foo Fighters, Radiohead, Muse among others; but I love putting on the jazz standards when I cook (Sinatra, Steve Tyrell, Diana Krall, Ella Fitzgerald, etc).

BackstreetPixie

Hello all I am back! I was in Las Vegas last week with hubby's family. It was my first time there. It was interesting and I had fun. I gained weight though... I am up 7 pounds. If you have not seen my post or other check ins, My TTA time has been extended... At least 5 more weeks may e longer. My UC medication is not working. They are putting me back on steroids for a month. They are doing blood work, a chest ex ray and some kind of urine test to see if I am able to take the next tier up of medication. I see the GI doc again in 5 weeks. Also in other news I have been officially diagnosed with PCOS as well.

Question of the Week: Backstreet Boys... I love them... Also love Bruno Mars. basically any pretty boys who sing well... Lol I love boy bands... Boyz II Men, Four Tops, Even some one direction... Lol

kmcorter

Hi @Meladoriestar! I am brand new and was wondering if I could join your check-in.

 

I guess my news for this week would be that I am attempting to track my BBT and chart my temps for the first time.  I'm struggling a bit because I am unable to take my temp at the same time each day and I'm a little worried that it will affect the temps but I figure I'll get a month under my belt and just see if I can see a shift.  I'm also using OPK's to help clarify.

@nola219 I'm so sorry you've had a hard week.  I deal with people like your SIL, unfortunately, all the time with my job and it is so frustrating.  I can only imagine what it is like for you on a personal level. I hope things get a little easier as the week goes on!

QOTW: Alison Krause, hands down.  I like all kinds of music but she is prob my favorite.

nola219

@kmcorter welcome and thank you for your kind words. 

I missed the QOTW: I love most all music, (no boy bands, sorry megan). My go to's this week, Queen, FUN., Radiohead and Jeff Buckley. Poetic lyrics sung by strong male voices.  

AggieBeth06

@polevaultrn - congrats on the +OPK. FX!

@morethansparrows08 - I'm sorry about the mix up.

@buttercup509 - gl at the genetics appt! This weekend sounds like a fabulous time!

@nola219 - hope you feel better soon & TP to your SIL. She sounds like a real gem.

@meredithcarole - sorry to hear about the cramps and spotting (((hugs)))

@meganwelch - huge big fluffy squeezey hugs!!!!!!! I'm so sorry to hear about your diagnoses and hope that you receive a treatment plan that works for you quickly. Also the weight you gained could just be primarily water

@kmcorter - welcome and gl with the temping!

_______________

The appointment went well. In case you want to look it up, it is called ATMAT which stands for Arvigo Technique of Mayan Abdominal Massage. Apparently it is used in Belize a lot (where Dr. Arvigo lives).

The practitioner believes she can help me. Some of the things she is suggesting - like using a special salve - I am holding off on to see how things go as we progress. I don't want to be taken for a ride if it's not something that actually helps.

The massage is all external. Whew.

She was able to feel my uterus and noted that in addition to being retroflexed, it is tipped slightly to the right. I think some of that has to do with my body's poor alignment (which I'm working on).

The technique starts with strokes from the middle and sides of the edge of your ribcage towards the belly button. Then up and down from your sternum to belly button. Then in a spiral pattern around the belly button out to the edges of your tummy. Then from the pubic and hip joint to a point midway between your pubic bone and navel. The hand positions change depending on the direction.

I'm going back today and again next Tuesday. The treatment plan is to come every week this cycle (which is a pain in the rear because it's in Houston). We will eventually move to twice a cycle, once a cycle and then once every few months. The progression depends on how my body responds (and if it does). I am to do the massage myself at home daily to keep things moving and aligned.

The massage is very similar to visceral manipulations, which is a "major medical" physical therapy technique. It is designed to remove adhesions in the gut (spots where organs fuse together - like naturally occurring scar tissue). She felt like I had a fair amount of adhesions.

In the least, the massage feels good and I see some short term value in meditating and focusing on myself. I still accept that it may be a bunch of hooey... But after the appointment and the research I have done, I think it is at least partially based in truth.

Some of the other things we discussed seemed a little quacky (like you're at your most assertive when your uterus is in the correct postion and more anecdotes like this).

We'll see!

I thought I was scheduled for May 1 with the new OBGYN but I got texts and emails saying it is scheduled for Wednesday. I'm freaking out a little because I'm not feeling prepared. I've got to hound my current OB office for my records again. I'll call the new office later today to see when the appointment actually is.

QOTW: I love music! I enjoy Journey and Elton John, but what gets me every time is when I hear Cross Canadian Ragweed. They were a "red dirt" country band when I was in college. They were big in Texas and Oklahoma, but have broken up in recent years. The songs have powerful lyrics and it harkens back to the free feeling I had in college. Like a blast from the past!

LilNugget19

Hi @Meladoriestar, thanks for doing the check-in.  I'm new here so this is my first check-in.  How are things with you?

I'm 20 days past my D&C and have finally stopped spotting, which is great because it was getting annoying because it wouldn't happen for a few days and then just start again and I wasn't prepared sometimes when it decided to come back.  Now I'm waiting for my first AF, which I know can take awhile but I'm worried it's going to catch me off guard in white shorts or something. I'm not used to having no clue when it's coming.  I'm also very nervous about how I will handle it emotionally, I think it will be a true punch in the gut that it's truly over.

QOTW: I love Blue October his voice makes my heart skip a beat and I'm currently loving Of Monsters and Men.

Lesliem0901

Happy Tuesday, ladies.

I am still anxiously waiting to pass tissue since 4/14. My levels dropped from 667 to 365 yesterday. FX it will happen soon.

I booked a trip to Florida since I will be taking May off from actively TTC. I can't wait!!  Now I have something to look forward to and distract me from my loss.

The Beatles are my go-to band; I get lost in their music in a good way.

Km380

Hi @meladoriestar‌ thanks for the check in! This week has been better, AF left so over the weekend H and I spent some non baby time together(if there's an abbreviation for that let me know I'm still learning!) I got +OPK this morning so tonight is back to ttc. I'm a little nervous though, after the last bfn H and I decided I'm not going to tell him when I O bc he is getting stressed and feeling pressure. (Which the rational part of me gets but the emotional part of me wants to scream really you feel pressure!?) So I'm a little nervous tonight he won't be in the mood. And then what? And tomorrow I have a work dinner so tonight is pretty much it. Hoping that Saturday and Sunday could help though?

@polevaultRN‌ fx for you!
@Lesliem0901‌ good for you getting a vacation booked!
@nola219‌ your sil sounds like the worst and I hate that you have to deal with her on top of everything else. TP
@Buttercup509‌ gl with your appt!

QOTW - I'm all over the place with music but right now it's OAR, bare naked ladies, dmb - music that is somehow associated with summer for me

meredithcarole

@kmcorter‌ welcome and sorry for your loss @AggieBeth06‌ glad you had a good appt and you're right, even if it doesn't work at least your are spending some time doing something for you @LilNugget19‌ AF totally caught me off guard, luckily I was wearing black pants. @jcar2‌ fx for zero today! @Lesliem0901‌ yay! another Beatles fan

Lizzyrella

Hi everyone, I am a newbie here and just posted my intro yesterday. To make a long story short, we have been trying to conceive #2 since October 2011 (took a couple months off in 2012 because DH was laid off). We have gone through three rounds of Clomid and an HSG and finally got pregnant following the HSG, only to miscarry April 11 at about 5 weeks. If you are interested in reading my whole story, here is the link. 

Right now, I am doing pretty well. It is getting easier, but I still have my moments. Just had my blood drawn this morning, hoping HCG is at zero. We are waiting for AF, not sure when she will show but I stopped bleeding from MC last Thursday or so. We have a consult on April 29 to talk about a procedure to reopen my right tube, which was blocked at our last HSG.

QOTW: I love lots of music, but really enjoy belting out to REO Speedwagon, Journey or Adele. I also like some Christian music, especially Jesus Culture and Tobymac.

longcat07

thanks for the check-in, @meladoriestar!  how are you this week?  is work less busy?

no gardening yet, but i've got everything staked out.  i'm just wondering if i should go to work digging up the sod with a spade, or if i should rent a rototiller and then rake out the grass.  i think i've decided to at least try out the other medical group that's closer by.  i'll keep my GP in the first group because she's wonderful, and probably everything else, but i'll probably only switch back to the first OB if this second group is really terrible.  honestly, i'm pretty easy to please, so it takes a lot to make me not want to go back to a place (especially if i've never actually been there in the first place).  right now i have a head cold and i still struggle with being bitter about other pregnancies around me, but each day is a little progress and i've mostly made peace with my situation and stopped fighting it.

QOTW: oh man, there's so much music that stops me in my tracks.  music and nature are the two things in my life that really speak to my soul (at the risk of sounding corny).  one band without fail is the smashing pumpkins (new and old).  total fangirl here.  there are a whole bunch of others who will force me to pause and absorb the sounds at least some of the time though, mostly stuff from the 90s (i think it's the nostalgia factor there) but there's a fair amount of newer and older stuff as well.  edit to elaborate: mostly alternative rock or rock-related, but some industrial too.

now, off to read what everyone else is up to this week.. 

Km380

@qanda2013‌ I can't decide if that acronym is hilarious or disturbing. But I did see it somewhere and now that post makes sense.... There much be a better way lol

longcat07

@polevaultRN - yay for the +OPK and ewcf!

@MoreThanSparrows08 - i do stuff like that all the time, and then i'll get mad at my partner and be all snippy and short with him for hours.  then i'll feel like an ass and apologize, but make sure to point out that he could have been better about reminding of things when there's a change in the usual routine.  (((hugs)))  i hope you can get your run in at some point.

@Buttercup509 - good luck at your appointment with the genetic counselor.  i hope you get good news.  sounds like you have a good weekend planned...either celebratory or a nice distraction.

@nola219 - i'm sorry you're having such a rough time right now. i try not to think about others who poorly handle what we want so badly because it doesn't really change anything.  i know that's harder when it's family though.

@meredithcarole - good to hear that you're feeling better!  i hope you don't have any more bleeding.  our bodies and their drama.  lol

@meganwelch - vegas!  sounds like fun!  boo on the 7lb though, and i hate that you're benched longer for your UC.  i only have IBS so while i can relate, it's only a little teeny bit.    i hope your doc can get it under control quickly.  and PCOS on top of all that?  yuck.  (((hugs)))

@kmcorter - good luck charting!  i love it.  it take a bit to get the hang of it but you'll get it.

@AggieBeth06 - glad your massage turned out to be all external, lol.  it sounds like it's based in science, even if some of the peripheral stuff might be a load of crap (what is the salve supposed to do?  lol).  i hope it helps!

@LilNugget19 - glad to hear your spotting finally stopped.  (((hugs)))  uncertainty sucks.

@jcar2 - sorry your betas weren't all the way down.  making me dislike "my" OB even more since he only ran two betas, the second of which was 14, and i guess that was good enough for him even though it wasn't all the way down.  probably because it seemed to be decreasing rapidly.  temps to weird things when your hormones are all out of whack.  mine just finally came down to their normal pre-O range over the weekend.  i had to discard today's temp because of my head cold though...i slept really poorly last night.

@Lesliem0901 - i'm sorry you're still waiting.  FL sounds nice though. 

@Km380 - i don't really get guys with the performance anxiety either, on the emotional level. it's like...this is the ONLY thing you have to do for this, so quit your whining.  lol.  of course i'd never say that.  as for "non-baby time"...i call all of it boinking, or sex, or sometimes a not-so-nice word.  when it's baby-related, it's the same thing, only with the phrase "goal-oriented" tacked on the front.  there's a term that seems to be popular on TTC forums that i absolutely hate because it's got to be the stupidest euphemism for sex ever.  i'm like, can we all grow up now?  lol

@VesperLynch - i'm glad you're having a better week.  i wish i could afford a homeopath, lol.  i hope you get good results.  AW means attention whore, i think, and ETA is edited to add.

@qanda2013 - your posts always crack me up.  "my darling death trap drove her last lap".  lol.  a new-to-you car sounds fun though!  love the hug gif.

@Lizzyrella - *FX* your hcg is down.  i'm sorry you've had so many struggles along the way.  (((hugs)))

MelissaL121

I am temping and have not seen a normal shift. FF took away my crosshairs but I still think that there was a definite temp shift, be if brief, to indicate ovulation. AF is still nowhere in sight. I have a 6 week follow-up apt with the Dr. who did my D&C on Friday.

@AggieBeth06- I'm fascinated by the massage-- sounds cool and definitely worth the try!!

@LilNugget19- I'm post D&C also and I've had the same thoughts. Do I need to take pads and tampons everywhere just incase...so I am prepared? I'm almost 6 weeks out now, so I know it will be here hopefully sooner rather than later, so this has come to mind more often than not.

@longcat07- Just finished filling my new raised bed garden with topsoil. I've got my lettuce planted. Anxious to plant tomatoes once the risk of frost is past. What will you be planting?

longcat07

MelissaL121 said:

@longcat07- Just finished filling my new raised bed garden with topsoil. I've got my lettuce planted. Anxious to plant tomatoes once the risk of frost is past. What will you be planting?

my partner's dad is going to be thinning out his raspberry patch and expressed a desire to give us some of the plants instead of just composting them, so raspberries for sure.  i'd like to do tomatoes and peppers as well, and some herbs.  i'm undecided on the rest of it.  it'll be too late to do lettuce by the time i get it going, since i actually have to dig the beds and stuff yet, but i might be able to get some in in the fall.  i've never grown lettuce so that'll be a new experience.  actually, i haven't done any gardening except for some flower beds since i moved out of my parents' house 10 years ago.  LOL

polevaultRN

@morethansparrows08 I'm sorry about AF and that you couldn't run with your friend this morning

@buttercup509 Good luck at your appt tomorrow! Sounds like you have a wonderful weekend planned!

@nola219 I'm sorry you're having a rough week ((hugs)) I hope you start feeling better! And sorry about your SIL drama. That's crazy!

@meredithcarole I'm glad you had a better week than last week. And thanks again to your DH for making our October Angels badge. I love it

@meganwelch I'm sorry that your TTA has been extended ((hugs)) I really hope you get some answers soon.

@kmcorter Welcome! Good luck with temping/charting.

@AggieBeth06 Glad you had a good experience with your massage and I hope you like your new OB!

@LilNugget19 Welcome! Yay for no more spotting and hopefully AF shows up sooner than later!

@jcar2 I really hope your hcg is 0 today! It's so hard waiting! Mine took 3 weeks to get to 3 and then no more testing!

@Lesliem0901 I hope your levels keep dropping like that! Enjoy some relaxation on your trip

@km380 Yay for the +OPK. Just try and seduce him tonight without telling him lol

@VesperLynch I'm glad you had a good week and that you were able to go to the gym. I love when the gym kicks my butt!

@qanda2013 Glad you had a good week. Congrats on DH's new job and your new car and I love that kitten gif. Too stinkin' cute!

@Lizzyrella Welcome and so sorry for your loss. I hope you find great support on this board. Just take it one day at a time. ((Hugs)) FX for negative beta level!

@longcat07 I haven't started gardening this season yet either. DH needs to get on that! I hope your cold goes away soon.

@MelissaL121 I hope AF arrives soon! ((hugs))

squeakyfrog15

Hey ladies! ***BFP and Loss Warning***

Well Saturday I finally got the BFP (very faint) I was expecting all week, and Yesterday I got the cramps and AF I was expecting all weekend. 

Anyway I'm doing okay, I hope you are all having a great week, and ((HUGS)) to those who need it! 

QOTW: I can listen to almost anything Justin Timberlake sings, and Needtobreathe!

AggieBeth06

@longcat07‌ - the salve has essential oils and particularly has castor oil. I don't doubt that naturopathic remedies can work, but $20 for 2 oz is steep so I'm not jumping on that until I find out more about that! I MIGHT be interested if there's a gold flakes in it!

polevaultRN

@squeakyfrog15 I am so sorry to hear that. T&P's for you. ((Hugs))

Lizzyrella

Thanks for the welcome, everyone.

squeakyfrog - I am so sorry!

Newbie question: I thought I had added a signature but it hasn't shown up. How do I add the signature?

stacy4571

I thought I had to but it turns out I was just updating activity (whatever that means). If you go to my bump and update your avatar and sig that should do it. I hope that was helpful and new info. If not then I have no clue what to do. I'm a newbie too.

stacy4571

Oh, it looks like my sig did not update. I guess I know nothing. Sorry.

yellowcat10

Thanks for the check-in @meladoriestar!

Testing went well, everything is well within normal and the RE said “looks really, really good”.  At this point it looks like our issue is some slight motility and morphology problems on my husband’s end.  Nothing too terrible, but enough to cause trouble.

I have another round of tests for my thyroid to do, but it also looks like that issue was triggered by the pregnancy which is a little unsettling and not sure what that means for next time.

yellowcat10

Sorry, the last part didn't make it:

QOTW: I change my music all the time, but the last few weeks it has been the Lumineers, Doom Tree and Mike Doughty. 

stacy4571

Let's see if it worked.

QOTW: right now I am loving Two Door Cinema Club. Love them.

kj808

Hi @meladoriestar and all of you lovely ladies! Hope your week is going well so far.

I'm doing okay. I went to see my RE last week and we have a plan in place so that's nice. This cycle may be a wash after having a SIS done at my appointment, but we're still going to proceed and continue trying anyway. If I don't get pg this cycle, then i'll call my RE office on CD1 and work with them with supplements or whatever non-invasive things they can do at this point to help me along.

QOTW: When I read this question the first person who came to mind was Ne-yo. I'm an R&B girl!