NBR: If you need a laugh...

847Christine · January 2009

DH sent me this. It's supposedly from the "Missed Connections" section on Craigslist. I am literally LOL uncontrollably.

Best of Craigslist: To the woman that crapped in my car

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.

I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.

At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don?t feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said ?First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me? was meant to be funny, not offensive.

I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle?s lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don?t think anyone wins 100% of the time. That?s why they call it ?gambling?. I?m the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better?like when you?re not sitting on a heated leather seat?

What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.

I await your call,
Tad

P.S. - If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early?Touch??