never mind, i gave in :(

yankee42 · January 2009

he fell asleep for a minute, and when he woke up, he screamed bloody murder, and was crying in little gasps, like he couldn't breathe..ugh..

i picked him up and rocked him for 2 minutes, and he was out..?

i know it does nothing if you don't follow it through..and i will..i guess, im just afraid im not cut out for sleep training..i want whats best for all of us of course..but why does it have to mean my child is in agony?

oh well.. i think i need to start this on a night when my husband is home..so a sunday, because that is the only night hes home ?

skoorbnibor · January 2009

I couldn't do it Nora. Luckily, I didn't have to, I read the secrets of the baby whisperer and used the pick up put down method. First night ihad to pick him up more than 40 times. Each night it got better and now I put him in his bed awake

Ethan cried so hard he threw up and burst a blood vessel in his eye. Scared the sh!t out me, and I said I am not letting him cry again. I know it works. but it is just not right for me.

yankee42 · January 2009

thanks skoorb...i kinda needed that.. i know it works, but these guys cry until they throw up and stuff...ugh..i guess i will reread that section in the baby whisperer, and give it a whirl

?

tina623 · January 2009

I am proud of you for trying

I couldn't do the full ferber method, either. Here's what I did.

I laid the girls in bed, with the lights low. I read a short story while they laid there. I turned on their mobiles, told them I loved them and said goodnight. I closed the door. I quickly found out that Katie doesn't like the dark so I have a night light there (that helped). They screamed and screamed. I got upset and brought them back in the living room with me. This went on for several days. Then I got a little tougher. I did the same routine but I went in after 5 minutes, 10 minutes then 15. If they were really upset ( and you know when your baby is too upset) I'd pick them up and walk around the dark room with her for a minute, then lay her back down. Sometimes it helped, sometimes it didn't. It took weeks. Lots of screaming and me sitting outside the door cringing and crying with their screaming but all I could think about was my friends daughter (7) and son (4) who don't sleep throught the night. They don't get a good night's sleep and their behavior suffers because of it. Anyway after a few weeks, it calmed down and they'd cry for 2 or 3 minutes then go to sleep.

Now, we read a book while they lay in the crib, I kiss my finger, touch it to their forehead and say good night I love you and shut the door. Sometimes I hear them talking but then they are out.

It takes time but once you decide it's time, go ahead and try it. They are used to you picking them up and rocking them and letting them sleep else where so you are going to have to break that habit as well.

(hugs)

jodynjames2005 · January 2009

I did my own brand of Ferber for bedtime. I would go in every 2-3 mins and do whatever it took to calm them down, even if that meant picking them up, rocking them, whatever. This way they never got too upset, and honestly it was rare that I had to rock or hold them. Most of the time, a butt patt worked fine. I started it pretty early on, about 3 mo old or so, so we had a pretty good bedtime routine by about 4 mo old. I didn't do intervals because I wasn't comfortable letting them cry for that long. It's just not right for me.

That said, I am not comfortable with any form of CIO at night and never have done anything. My kids STTN at all different ages (12 weeks, 12 weeks, 6 mo, 10 mo, 10 mo), so I think they just do it when they are ready. I got up with them and fed them until they were done eating at night. And they all stopped eventually

Charlotte will sometimes fall almost asleep as I am feeding her and for some reason that freaks her out and she cries when I put her in bed (they never cry usually at bedtime or naptime). Like, a really upset cry. So I still rock her on those occasions. She probably would fall asleep on her own eventually, but why put her and me through it?! I love those quiet moments spent rocking a sleeping baby. Oh, lord how I love them. They are so few and far between these days.

Don't do anything that YOU don't feel comfortable doing. There is no one right answer, only the one that works for you.

12106mrsmun · January 2009

jodynjames2005:

but why put her and me through it?! I love those quiet moments spent rocking a sleeping baby. Oh, lord how I love them. They are so few and far between these days.

Don't do anything that YOU don't feel comfortable doing. There is no one right answer, only the one that works for you.

I whole-heartedly agree with Jody!! And I have to add, don't let anyone make you feel guilty for how you get those boys to sleep, Nora.

LucyPevensie · January 2009

I also agree wholeheartedly. We won't do CIO either - but might do a version of what Jody described she did, but that's as far as I can see myself going. And to me, that fact that you rocked him for 2 minutes and then he's out like a light - great! I don't see anything wrong with that. And it is nice to rock a baby.

ABC-123 · January 2009

Thanks for all of your experiences. Ty has a lot of problems sleeping and we need to do something, but I am not sure I will be able to let him CIO either ...

Mr.&MrsS · January 2009

We would go in every 5 or so minutes (sometimes a little longer after the first time) and calm him down to non crying. Sometimes that did mean picking him up.The first day took hours, and we did eventually give up. But, he got it pretty quick...I would say in about 3 days he was going 11-12 hours at night and we can put him down awake. (Only at bed time though, we still have to rock him to sleep for naps). You need to do what works best for you, if you dont want to let them CIO then you can certainly find another way to make it work. Good luck to you!! It is very hard on both you and them, I hope you find a solution that works for you and your boys!!

Want a personalized experience?

never mind, i gave in :(

Re: never mind, i gave in :(

Choose Another Board

Search Boards