Poll: Who knows?

yogisunam · January 2009

With Lari getting outed today, I am curious who knows what with regards to your TTC story.

yogisunam · January 2009

Me:

When I got pg I told my sister, a friend, and my yoga teacher training group. When I m/c'd I untold everyone, plus the people in my office at work. My parents and IL's no nothing.

Since, I have a couple friends who know that we are still trying and are beginning the process of IF testing. I only talk to people who ask. But my sister never asks, and pretty much shys away from the whole conversation.

I'm considering telling my aunt, who is childless (lesbian) and more likeminded about such things. My mom had 5 kids and is extremely religious so I feel like she won't provide the support I am looking for.

t.bird · January 2009

nobody knows the trouble i've seen

nobody knows my sorrow

i kid- my 2 bff's know (but they don't get it- they just refer to me as "Monica" on Friends) and this older woman at work- but she doesn't understnd it either. ha.

easjer05 · January 2009

Mom knows just about everything.

Sister knows about this current 'pregnancy' because we discussed ectopics (she had one and lost a tube).

All the remaining family and most friends know about the m/c and assume we are trying again, but I've kept this 'pregnancy' pretty quiet because of the uncertainty. Though given that one of my cousins found me on FB, the whole fam might know soon. I'm hoping he'll just be oblivious.

My immediate coworkers probably know the most because of the time I've had to take has interfered with meetings and I've been fairly distracted lately. It's oversharing time for us, which I'm sure they enjoy immensely.

smilelari · January 2009

A couple of friends

My parents and sister were totally in the know for the first cycle but I've been trying to keep this cycle under wraps.

All the girls on this board and T-TTC

And now I guess all the girls on the CO board

MrsO1111 · January 2009

No one knew anything the whole first year except a few of my closest girlfriends and my mom and uncle (like a dad to me) and maybe 1-2 of my mom's friends. Everyone on that list lives out of state.

Then we got KU. There was drama surrounding early bloodwork that involved several trips 100 miles away, so DH and I told his parents about TTC for so long b/c we had to explain why he kept missing work. Then DH told everyone under the sun we were KU when I was like 5 1/2 weeks. Then we found out about blighted ovum and had D&C at 10+ weeks.

That means that now the ENTIRE COMMUNITY knows we're trying, and about 25% of them know we've been trying "a while." Oh, and most everyone at work knows I've had to see a specialist b/c I missed a lot of work even before getting KU.

It's annoying, but oh well. It's freeing in a way that so many people know. I'm just tired of hearing "it'll happen when it's supposed to," and "it's all in God's plan" from mere acquaintances (or anyone for that matter).

Vent over.

Nikki1007 · January 2009

Everyone know because DH has a big mouth, ask me if I am happy about that.

tivogirl · January 2009

Mom, Aunt, Sister and 2 bff's. I asked my family not to ask me about it and I would just give them updates if I had any news. My two best friends both had babies in the past year and they don't bring it up unless I do.

I talk more openly about it with my Aunt who has dealt with infertility and was never able to get pregnant.

pmarie33 · January 2009

My boss knows we are trying. That's all he knows.

totalpanic · January 2009

no one knew we were even trying at first except for someone very close who (accidentally) told my mother who HAD to tell my father

they kept our secret

about 2 months after a m/c we told parents and siblings about the m/c

after that they only knew about the trying not the trouble

Dr.Loretta · January 2009

My side of the family, my friends, one couple DH and I both know. No co-workers, no one on DH's side.

HazelEyes730 · January 2009

We didn't tell anyone at first. Then I got sick of being asked when and told just about everyone we are close to. I actually like it. I have a lot of great support and a couple of my friends are also struggling with IF and they are open to me about it because I was open to them.

I don't want anyone to know exactly when we are going to do the IVF cycle except our parents. That may have to change to include our good friends we are going on vacation with right after but I'm still unsure if we will go or not.

staycee · January 2009

pretty much most people I know, know everything. except for the random CWs that I don't talk to.

mb~zf · January 2009

My supervisor knows we're having trouble. She dealt with secondary if and lost 3 pregnancies so she gets it.

Most of our friends know we're trying because almost every single one in a group of 12 is pregnant or just had a baby in the last year. Several of them have gone through IUI and IVF and get it too.

My sister and his mom know too. I'm really close to his mom and had to ask her to tell my FIL to lay off the baby comments because they were starting to bother me.

allinduetime · January 2009

almost all of our friends know that we've had some trouble TTC. a few close friends, my boss, and my parents and sister know that we're doing IUI's and meds.

my way to deal with the stress from it is to talk about it, and i don't mind that people know.

MarcyIam · January 2009

My mom 2 friends and 1 co-worker. One of the friends is also a co-worker who sits next to me so is nice to let someone know who gets why I'm always coming in late, etc... And the other "regular" co-worker went through it as well, so was nice to talk to her about it.

Oh - and DH's sister b/c she works in an OBGYN office that does some fertility treatments so we checked with her a couple times on meds (which, as expected, resulted in nothing since I wasn't a patient - but worth a try!).

MarcyIam · January 2009

Oh - and DH has let it slip to a couple of friends when he was drunk. Oops! One gets it since they also had IF, but the others don't really get it. Especially one who's baby is due in a few weeks - doesn't get it at ALL and sometimes says things that are so inappropriate. But, w/e - we deal.

AussieAbbie · January 2009

I have a really good friend/neighbor that I confide EVERYTHING in -so she knows, one co-worker I told last week and two nesties that I've hooked up with here locally (do they count?!!)

Oh, and my Dad's partner (my Dad passed away 4yrs ago and I had his partner walk me down the aisle), he knows too, but lives down under... far far from Nashville!!

I don't want the world knowing that we are failing at this, its bad enough that we are let alone everyone else knowing! Crying