Tell it to me straight (RE Appt mentioned)

Serendipitie · January 2009

Background: 35, TTC for only 10 cycles. Current insurance covers IF testing but no treatment, H's insurance doesn't even cover that, and I am looking for a new job that may or may not have as good of coverage.

Went to RE consult. Basically, he doesn't feel we need to do any diagnostic testing yet, wants us to TTC for 2-3 more cycles (to make it a year of trying), but then wants to go straight into injectibles after the tests in 2-3 months. This is pretty overwhelming considering I didn't even want to do Clomid. He talked about Clomid, but then said he didn't even bother with it because he was all about getting his patients KU ASAP and he felt it was a waste of time.

I am shocked. I thought we could get the diagnostics done now while I still had the insurance, and then have some time to consider the possibility of drugs, IF procedures, etc. but he made me feel like I obviously didn't want a baby bad enough if I wasn't willing to jump on the drug bandwagon. The drugs are NOT covered by insurance.

I do have some more options, like getting an appointment with a different RE or going to my OB to see if they would be willing to do any testing without being a drug pusher....

I need to hear it straight. Am I stupid for not wanting to be on drugs yet? Am I being too demanding for wanting the testing now before I find a new job? Am I totally not worthy of a baby if I'm not ready to shoot myself full of fert meds after 12 cycles?

kimarino13 · January 2009

I am totally the wrong person to ask because we went straight to IVF without trying any other treatment options at all. But, that aside, it seems like you aren't comfortable with going right into injectibles and that is OK! You need to find an RE that you are on the same page with. I am sure that RE is out there.

lovejonesy77 · January 2009

kimarino13:
I am totally the wrong person to ask because we went straight to IVF without trying any other treatment options at all. But, that aside, it seems like you aren't comfortable with going right into injectibles and that is OK! You need to find an RE that you are on the same page with. I am sure that RE is out there.

ditto what Kimarino said. Maybe you should go check out Dr. Hatch after all. This guy might not be the right RE for you! Good luck girl!

totalpanic · January 2009

Serendipitie:
Am I stupid for not wanting to be on drugs yet?

absolutely not

Serendipitie:
Am I being too demanding for wanting the testing now before I find a new job?

absolutely not

Serendipitie:
Am I totally not worthy of a baby if I'm not ready to shoot myself full of fert meds after 12 cycles?

he's an ass for even putting that thought in your head

at 35, you have a little time but not a lot but you need to be comfortable too

a year ago my husband and i were in a similar situation (from my bfp story):

"We had absolutely no intentions of rushing into drugs, procedures etc. We started testing just in case something was wrong; we could fix it without wasting precious more time at our age. We were in denial until about 12 hours before trigger and 36 before IUI (technically, I still am).

At our appointment at the end of February 2008, the doctor told us that at my age *IF* everything else was good, we had a 7% chance of conceiving on our own. Then he started going down the list of all the things that were wrong, bringing our percentage even lower and that he was very surprised we ever got pregnant on our own. We left in shock and denial. We went home to let all the numbers sink in. Then, realizing that I had just finished the clomid challenge, it would be a waste (of three follies) to wait until June (our original plan) and we called for more information. We triggered the next morning and had our IUI on March 1."

gl

pmarie33 · January 2009

My RE is a drug pusher too and I want nothing of it. Except the Met, I need that. I really like her though. She knows I want to take my time, so she's just going to check my prog levels until further notice.

murphyec · January 2009

Ditto kim. You need a Dr you are comfortable with, not someone who is going to push you into a method of treatment you don;t want.

Danse · January 2009

Honestly, if ins. is an issue, I would request the diagnostics now. IMO it's sill to wait.

FWIW, I went to the RE after about 8 months (since I wasn't getting AF, ovulating and DH had a bad SA) and I'm 26. He started diagnostics immediately (which was good, because he discovered a tubal issue). IMO there's no need to wait and I would push him if I were in your shoes - if nothing else but to have it covered by ins.

Good luck!

Nikki1007 · January 2009

You may need to look for another RE. One that is on the same page as you are. There is no reason to wait 2-3 more cycles for testing. Also if you are not comfortable with injectibles then you should have other options.

QCinOct · January 2009

ditto what everyone else said. i would insist on getting some diagnostic testing done- you're past the 6 mo mark and that will allow you to feel comfortable with proceeding drug or drug-free

easjer05 · January 2009

We haven't reached the point of testing and procedures yet, but I can tell you what I would tell you if I took out IF testing and put in another issue.

You should be comfortable with your doctor and your treatment plan. You should be free to request diagnostic testing and have it done if it's reasonable or get a good, reasoned response to why the doc feels it's unnecessary (which I don't see here). Yes, getting knocked up asap is a good goal, especially if you are dealing with AMA. But . . . why jump to that if you have an issue that could be treated more easily and with less invasiveness.

It seems to me that testing is a good idea to make sure there isn't an underlying cause that needs to be dealt with. And again, you should never be forced into a treatment path. His goal may be knock you up asap - but injectibles are big leap, imo.

In my mind, I am sort of equating it to seeing a specialist because you are overweight. It could be possible that you have a thyroid issue or are borderline diabetic (which may not be the cause of your issues with weight but needs to be treated). You expect to be tested for these things and instead you are told to eat healthy and work out for 3 months and if the weight isn't gone, he'll schedule you for gastric bypass.

In other words, the option is a viable one that might work, but seems rather an extreme step, especially without having had any diagnostic testing to rule out a problem or ensure that there isn't something that would interfere with the treatment course he is suggesting.

calhoun05 · January 2009

I will echo others' sentiment - it is vital that you feel comfortable with and confident in your doctor for a process like infertility. The process is too stressful as is to add insecurity about your care to your worries. I would call another RE. If you can't get an appointment right away, it might be worth telling them you're looking for a second opinion - it might get you in more quickly.

Serendipitie · January 2009

Thanks everyone - I responded last night, but I guessthe stupid nest ate my post? I just didn't want to be one of those pushy GP'ers that make their doctor do testing wayyyy too soon

smilelari · January 2009

If you are losing insurance that covers diagnostics push for the diagnostics now. Wait until you get through those diagnostics and know what you are dealing with before talking about treatment. And if you aren't comfortable with injectibles, don't do it. Do what you are comfortable. That may change with time

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