de-influencing baby gear

virginiaham · September 3

Just for fun, (FTMs weigh in too!) — what’s one thing you would de-influence from the baby gear lists out there and why? Do you have a favorite alternative or just skip altogether?

FTMs anything in particular are you curious about??

Not posting for debate as two people may have perfectly valid reasons/situations that lead them to opposite choices, but I know it was so helpful for me to hear personal perspectives/situations/priorities esp when I was a FTM sorting through the lists of “must-haves”!

thatbaintforbetty · September 3

Oooh travel systems as an absolute necessity.

I actually sold them for a while and they can be very very useful. But I didn’t have one for either of my girls. We had an infant carrier car seat and then bought a lightweight stroller at about 6 months to a year? And I had no complaints. I also think baby wearing is great and loved my sling and wrap. It’s super dependent on your situation. My kids were tiny and lasted in the infant car seat (without being super ridiculous to lug around) till a year easily. Thats not everyone’s reality though. I might get one this go around, mostly because I have a car seat I want/love and buying the system turns out to be the same price as what I did before. 🤷‍♀️ (the car seat is like a hundred bucks more expensive then it used to be😱)

I think I said this in the question thread, but bottle warmers. We never warmed a bottle (I might have raised breast milk to closer to room temp under warm running water once or twice but never had enough to freeze and barely even had any to put in the fridge for later). So that might be more a breastfed thing. For formula? Nope. Also wipes warmer, not needed. You will be on the go and without access at some point anyways.

I bought a “changing table” for the oldest but almost never used it, didn’t bother with the second kiddo. So many things I know of worked for other people that I never had/did/needed. Modulate according to your needs.

virginiaham · September 3

@thatbaintforbetty totally, my BFF taught me just to hold the wipes in my hands for a few seconds to take the chill out of them and we never did more than that.

Mine is the dedicated bedside bassinets/moses baskets, maybe not marketed as an absolute necessity but it’s funny how you start to feel like you need things when you see them over and over (just me?? 😆)…

Some of them are so pretty but babies outgrow them so quickly (and a Moses basket I bought for my son ended up molding in storage after all of 8 weeks of use we got out of it so we couldn’t even resell it). A travel pack n play with the infant insert worked great for the months we had our first and then our second in our room, and then after they moved to their cribs it just converted to a containment zone for my showers. It’s stored perfectly in their closet so it’ll be ready for this baby. Obv for co-sleeping disregard!

Side note a Slumberpod is a clutch add-on for traveling or needing to separate a sleeping space when space/options are limited.

Confession I am kiiinda contradicting myself and getting the bassinet to go on our stroller frame for this go around, since we pretty much have all of the other gear already 😝

On a serious note, I’d also add de-influencing any of the car-seat add-ons made by other companies that invariably pop up (piddle pads that go under baby, the cute car seat strap covers, infant inserts not by the manufacturer, etc.)—due to safety. Car Seats for the Littles has a good article on non-approved products for car seats with easy alternatives.

thatbaintforbetty · September 4

@virginiaham absolutely yes to the car seat add-ons! If it didn’t come with the seat..DO NOT ADD IT. It voids the warranty on the car seat, and you absolutely do not want that to happen. This applies to seat mats as well I believe. Same as with your car, if you add aftermarket parts you void the warranty.

Crazy take…I never really used a crib. We had one for DD1 and she probably only used it a handful of times. Didn’t bother with DD2. We currently do not have room for one and will have a bassinet type thing, haven’t decided exactly what yet. I’m hoping that when we move in March we will have a room for him or one for DD2 and him to share.

I did buy a snugglenest, it’s a portable baby sleep thing, kinda like a basket but it folds small and is great for travel. I definitely anticipate my parents watching him or us traveling, so the prime day sale price was worth it.

nopegoat · September 20

@virginiaham we totally have a Moses basket. Its a pure aesthetics thing. I think we actually used it maybe a handful of times with 2 kids. Totally have it out again for this baby. 🤣 it definitely makes for some cute pics but definitely not a necessity at all.

I also despise double strollers. I feel like any place I would truly need one, are also the most inconvenient to use. Dr offices, crowded amusement parks and museums. They are just so bulky and awkward to have to move around seats, tables, and loads of people. I use a baby carrier for the littlest, an umbrella stroller for thr next littlest, and then everyone else holds hands or holds onto the stroller. Backpack for our stuff. So much easier.

I've never used a changing table, wipe warmers, pee pee tee pee, diaper genie, or rocking chair/glider.

brookejay06 · September 20

@nopegoat girllll I totally understand how bulky a double stroller can be but I am alwaysssss that girl squeezing it through the doors of the bank or the library lol. Just my opinion and experience- I ADORE my double BOB stroller. I agree that baby wearing is more convenient for the first 9 mo but once they’re a bit bigger I love the ability to strap the kids in, get all the junk off my back and into the stroller, have a place for my water bottle etc.

Agree about the diaper genie. Maybe mine was defective but it never concealed the poop smell so what’s the point?

Agree about changing table. I just get on the floor or couch (with a little waterproof pad underneath for leaks). I don’t want to have to move locations in my house just to change a diaper.

@virginiaham About the car seat add ons - I was thinking about the zipper cover for the infant seat bc it’s gonna be winter and the car is sometimes freezing, and because we go for walks. Is that super dangerous too? I haven’t done the research tbh. But I know baby isn’t supposed to wear a jacket or snowsuit in the car so I thought this was a nice option as it’s freeeeezing here.

Rocking chair/glider- this gets soooooo much use at our house!!! We have both. A rocking chair in our room or baby’s, and a glider in the living room. Someone is almost always rocking baby. And when I’m at someone house that doesn’t have one I’m like…… where do I sit lol. Just my preference.

I would like to de influence the baby TOYS. You know what most babies love? Trash. (Like empty toilet paper rolls) Your other kids toys. A mirror you already have. A plastic water bottle that makes a crunchy sound. The tag on the bottom of a blanket.

Same with bouncers/ play gyms / swings - These CAN be helpful IF your baby likes them. Don’t buy them, borrow them. I had a baby that refused to ever be put down no matter how cool the swing was. I had a baby that just rolled off the floor play mat every time. If you find yourself needing it in the moment (like, gosh I really wish I had a swing right now while I’m cooking dinner, baby would love it) ask to borrow on a local FB group. And then buy it if you want. But those things get used for such a short amount of time and it really depends on baby’s personality.

brookejay06 · September 20

Actually I want to clarify my thoughts on the double stroller (@nopegoat)
I only use it a ton because our town is very walkable and we walk everywhere. We walk to the bank/library etc. I wouldn’t drive to the library then unload my bulky stroller to bring inside. I would use a carrier or umbrella stroller like @nopegoat said! I agree that it’s too bulky for the aisles of a grocery store or even an airport (even though you may do a ton of walking there)

virginiaham · September 20

@brookejay06 oh yeah the shower cap style winter covers for the infant car seats (like JJ Cole or Skip Hop versions) are great! Basically you don’t want anything extra (or bulky) between baby and the car seat, including jackets/winter jumpsuits etc. Those shower cap style covers fit over the outer part of the seat and work great!

Def agree on a double stroller in a walkable area. We lived near downtown in another city when my kids were 3 and infant and we used the double stroller to go everywhere, it was honestly our primary vehicle (also this was during COVID and it was soooo good to get longer times outside of the house). It def doesn’t make sense where we are now when we have to drive everywhere we go so I sold it.

I’m really torn on a rocker for this one; we’ve never had one. Aside from rocking baby I would love to get one that is wide enough for a kid to sit next to me for read alouds, but we have a puppy and I’m terrified of crushing a paw or tail. Maybe I’ll just bring one of our front porch rocking chairs inside to try it out first to see if it’ll turn into a must-have.

nopegoat · September 20

Oh and another one, the big perfect nursery. We did one with our first, half did one with our second, and the rest have basically had a small nook in our room. My babies stay in our room for the first year of their lives, sometimes longer.

I swear the nursery is more for us trying to pass time during pregnancy than actually for the babies more often than not.

nopegoat · September 20

@brookejay06 and @virginiaham we just took a wagon when we were in walkable distance with stuff, but yea definitely if we have to drive not a chance.

bridgiebee82 · September 21

I'm with @nopegoat on the diaper genie and the peepee teepee. I just have a skip hop diaper pail that seals and the smell is *mostly* hidden. No need for specialized bags, a regular kitchen trash bag will do. And that peepee teepee will shoot straight up in the air like a rocket. You're better off taking a cold wipe and rubbing it across baby's belly and waiting a minute undoing the diaper, letting some air in, and quickly closing it back up while baby boy pees, and THEN changing the diaper. I learned this very quickly lol. I don't know if this method holds true for girls. Any insight? Lol

ETA: I do love my changing table as I have a really hard time bending over. I have 5 herniated discs, so it becomes exhausting, especially when baby gets older and it's like wrestling an alligator to change a diaper. The swing worked for like 5 minutes because I have a velcro baby/toddler. And toys--his favorite thing to play with when he was little was a wooden spoon and a plastic Tupperware container. It makes toy rotation a lot easier 😆

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