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May 2025 Babies
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Mental Health Check

tonyaxxotonyaxxo member
in May 2025 Babies
Hi Everyone! I’m new here and a first time mom. Wondering how people are doing mentally? I feel as though everything I see online/when I speak to people is all happiness and excitement. However I feel very scared and overwhelmed and overthink a lot. Any one else feel like this? Anyone have resources/articles/suggestions on mental health support during pregnancy? 
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Re: Mental Health Check

  • gravcassgravcass member
    I think there is such a myth that perpetuates around pregnancy and happiness and I think a lot of people portray an outside appearance because that's what's expected. 
    Our bodies are going through HUGE hormonal changes and an average woman takes two years to get back to pre-pregnancy hormone levels after giving birth. Common feelings (even before birth) are;
    Sadness, stress, uncaused anger (sometimes towards our partner), worry. Our brain literally looses Grey matter while pregnant and is rewiring itself in order to be ready to care for this infant we are growing. Some mood shifts are bound to happen. 
    What you are feeling is not uncommon and I belive is just an unspoken shadow part of pregnancy no one acknowledges. If things get to much, never feel you have to push through. Talk to your doctor. I wish I had talked to mine my first post partum experience. I had post partum anxiety so bad, but never acknowledged it. 
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  • tonyaxxotonyaxxo member
    thank you for your kind words. Society/social media sometimes makes it feel like any emotion other than being so overjoyed is wrong. It’s reassuring to know these feelings can be normal
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  • rlindqui16rlindqui16 member
    You can call your insurance company and see if they include mental health therapy in your coverage. I found out mine does this time around, and I am planning to wait to reach out until the new year (when deductibles reset, as we know we are hitting our deductible next year with baby’s birth). But having that kind of connection both before baby is born and after will hopefully be an extra line of support for me. You can pick how often you would want to meet and many do it virtually at this point so if you need to do a session while your newborn sleeps on you at home, it’s totally possible!

    Another thing I have found to be very helpful is our local early childhood education system (typically put on by your public school district). Mine offered free classes and playtimes for you to show up to with you little one and be able to make connections with local moms that have babies your child’s age.

    It truly does take a village to raise a kid, find out what that looks like for you (ie close family/friends, or getting connected to local groups/church). Having a baby and becoming a mom is a massive change, physically and mentally. Genuine connections with others who can help and will watch out for you will be the biggest lifesaver when dealing with all the emotions of pregnancy and postpartum.
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  • knottie1e59232890a7925fknottie1e59232890a7925f member
    I feel the same way. Like I’m so excited and I love my baby, but I’m just nervous scared and depressed. I think the fact that I’m over 13 weeks and just still so sick and tired doesn’t help. It feels like this is never going to end. I’m never going to feel better and then I’m going to have a baby who depends on me 24/7. Everyone keeps saying it will get better second trimester, I’m just waiting for that “better feeling”. I go to work and then come home and sleep. I don’t even have the energy to get excited about a nursery or registry!!! And I feel guilty that I’m hating being pregnant. 
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  • nibsnlintnibsnlint member
    When I was pregnant with my 3rd, depression started for me. My pregnancy was planned and very much wanted and there I was feeling hopeless and pointless. I told my OB at the very next appointment and she got me on Zoloft and I started talking to a counselor. This is wayyyy more normal than most folks realize. For sure talk to your OB. Your treatment plan may look totally different than mine, and that’s totally ok. Take care of you, friend. 
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  • cuveema12-23cuveema12-23 member
    I tried for over a year to get pregnant with my first and was so grateful but then I started to feel really bad. I got sciatica, carpal tunnel, exhaustion, migraines, etc constantly. I finally realized that I hate being pregnant. This time around I’ve been more prepared. Went to therapy and basically realized I can be excited for my baby and love my baby but not enjoy the process of pregnancy.

    i also think it really preps you for being a mom. The long nights, sore nipples, post birth healing didn’t seem so awful after being so miserable while pregnant because all those other symptoms went away.  Honestly try to give yourself some grace and find people in your life that you can be honest with and vent to. So many people go through this and you are not alone! 
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  • mcmanda4321mcmanda4321 member
    Hormones have a lot to do with it too! During my first pregnancy I was on cloud 9. I had zero anxiety (when I typically have a generalized anxiety disorder), and I was happy all the time. This time around my anxiety is heightened compare dto my baseline. It's crazy how different I feel from that pregnancy to this one, and I definitely think it's just how my hormones are making me react this time around. Either way, it's definitely normal to not feel so happy all the time in pregnancy!
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  • readsalott1013readsalott1013 member
    edited November 2024
    I hate being pregnant. This is my third pregnancy and still hate it, lol. But I love the outcome. That said: there was a lot of anxiety around having a daughter for my first (my mother and I have a strained relationship and I allowed that fear to cloud my joy). With the second daughter I was concerned about giving my first a sister (also have mixed relationships with my sisters) to the point it left me awake at night and anxious. Now I’m about to have my first boy and have extreme levels of disappointment as I SO wanted a third girl to round out my trio. Basically, for me, pregnancy never got better. I struggled physically with all of them, emotionally was a wreck, and never could “settle” enough to feel connected to my babies prior to their births. 

    I hope you don’t struggle like me but I definitely feel the myth of “happy motherhood” and pregnancy permeates society and families. I am the only of my sisters and mother who struggled so much and no one can understand how I felt then or now. So I keep a lot to myself. If you can find someone to confide in, to vent to, to talk to, that is invaluable. As someone who doesn’t really have that it would likely help as I know I would love to just be able to express myself freely. 
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  • eve-asaeve-asa member
    I would stay off social media as much as possible. It will make you feel worse. Posts are planned and organized snapshots like any advertisement even if it’s not from an influencer. Limit your scrolling time. If that doesn’t help, talking to a therapist is always great. They will probably tell you the same thing I just said so this one is free :). Pregnancy isn’t fun for many, even the people posting online. Hope this helps with the journey!
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