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Help! I was unaware I was pregnant

knottie8d722e1183ecc35eknottie8d722e1183ecc35e member
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months
Hi bump community, I'm looking for some reassurance or advice from a mom that has given birth after either finding out she was pregnant later than the first missed period, or someone who did things that you aren't supposed to do when pregnant and how you overcame the guilt of those decisions.

Background - I had a 'normal' for me period a few months ago, had to change tampons etc. nothing out of the ordinary my flow is not usually extremely heavy but it came right on time when I expected it to so I had no reason to second guess that it was something else.

Fast forward to the next month where I did not have a period and took a test to get the positive sign!

When attending my first ultrasound I had expected to be right around 8 weeks but ended up finding out that we were measuring at 15 weeks. I know that the dating can be off but I do know that I was pregnant for at least 6-9 weeks before I took a test. During that time it feels like I did a lot of dumb things that pregnant people are not advised to do. I'm just looking for someone who maybe had a similar experience and how you are doing now that your baby has been born and what words of support you have knowing what you know now.

In my gut I feel like the baby is fine and I will follow up with a specialist to do extra testing but everything on the internet is so daunting I'm just looking for real people who have had some sort of similar surprise or even know of someone who was unaware and made choices they wouldn't have made otherwise.

Also I should note I am not an addict and as soon as I had the positive test I got my vitamins and discontinued all activities that are advised against in pregnancy.
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Re: Help! I was unaware I was pregnant

  • knottie389e47421d593fdbknottie389e47421d593fdb member
    I raised similar concerns with my midwife, as I was working as a bartender pre-pregnancy and I was drinking alcohol and smoking occasional cigarettes until the day I missed my period and got a positive pregnancy test. I was assured that baby doesn't actually share your bloodstream until around 8 weeks, like nature's way of giving us that buffer period, and all indicators were looking good and normal so I had no reason for concern. 

    As long as you stopped these activities as soon as you knew, you likely also have nothing that worry about, but it's definitely worth discussing with your OB or other medical provider, at least for reassurance!

    One last point that really helped to ease my anxiety over this issue, I was told "remember, your body takes care of the baby before it takes care of you. Even drug addicts manage to have healthy babies because of this. If you're doing the right things now, and all tests look normal, your baby is probably totally fine"
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  • knottie8d722e1183ecc35eknottie8d722e1183ecc35e member
    Thank you! That last point really gives me peace of mind and I am talking to my doc today so will get some more reassurance from them. Thanks for the response. I had no issues quitting everything once I knew but anytime you look on google it makes you worry!
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  • SaphireSweetie88SaphireSweetie88 member
    knottie8d722e1183ecc35e said:
    Hi bump community, I'm looking for some reassurance or advice from a mom that has given birth after either finding out she was pregnant later than the first missed period, or someone who did things that you aren't supposed to do when pregnant and how you overcame the guilt of those decisions.

    Background - I had a 'normal' for me period a few months ago, had to change tampons etc. nothing out of the ordinary my flow is not usually extremely heavy but it came right on time when I expected it to so I had no reason to second guess that it was something else.

    Fast forward to the next month where I did not have a period and took a test to get the positive sign!

    When attending my first ultrasound I had expected to be right around 8 weeks but ended up finding out that we were measuring at 15 weeks. I know that the dating can be off but I do know that I was pregnant for at least 6-9 weeks before I took a test. During that time it feels like I did a lot of dumb things that pregnant people are not advised to do. I'm just looking for someone who maybe had a similar experience and how you are doing now that your baby has been born and what words of support you have knowing what you know now.

    In my gut I feel like the baby is fine and I will follow up with a specialist to do extra testing but everything on the internet is so daunting I'm just looking for real people who have had some sort of similar surprise or even know of someone who was unaware and made choices they wouldn't have made otherwise.

    Also I should note I am not an addict and as soon as I had the positive test I got my vitamins and discontinued all activities that are advised against in pregnancy.
    Aww hugs mama! I agree with everything was mentioned in the prevous response. I think you and your baby will be totally okay!! Our bodies are miraculous and can do a lot so I wouldn't worry - especially if you mentioned the things you were doing to your doctor just so they are aware of it. 

    Also, if it helps, my bio mom was a MAJOR alcoholic and probably drugs as well. She missed a lot of appointments and I doubt she took any prenatal vitamins or anything since she continued her activities while pregnant and I turned out perfectly fine. I don't recommend following her path haha but hopefully that can give you some relief as well. Feel free to message me if you have any questions about it!
    Me:35 | DH: 32
    Married: 06-2024
    TTC #1: Since November 2015
    Restarted TTC "count" Oct. 2016
         due to previous issues.
    ***TW***
    BFP: 11/4/2016 
    BFP: 07/17/2024
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