Hey all! I introduced myself on the into post but my user name didn’t update, I’m the 35 year old with an almost 10 year old who can smell toothpaste from across the store right now 😂. I had two miscarriages before my son was born. The first was a 7 week loss after seeing the heart beat the week before. The second was a blighted ovum seen somewhere around 8 weeks or so. This was 12 years ago so my memory’s a little sketchy.
Last Friday I had some spotting and cramping and just knew I was miscarrying again. Got in for an ultrasound and my gestation sac measured 5w5d but no yolk sac or fetal pole. My mind went straight to impending miscarriage from a blighted ovum. But the ultrasound tech and the nurse practitioner both made things seem a little more hopefully because it could have just been too early to see anything.
So I’ve made it half way through my two week wait until a follow up ultrasound next Friday. It’s such a weird head space to be in. There’s either a life growing inside of me, or there’s nothing at all. I don’t know whether I should mentally be preparing for another life to enter the world or for another D&C. I have alllllll the symptoms, but that’s not reassuring because I would have all the symptoms with a blighted ovum too.
Anyway. I don’t now if there’s really a purpose to this post. Just getting it out because I can’t really talk about to anyone since no one knows I’m pregnant.
Anyone with a story like mine that resulted in a successful pregnancy, feel free to share 🙂
Re: In limbo
They did an ultrasound but they were only checking to see if the gestational sack was there since it's too early for them to see anything else and they wanted to see if I had a visible SCH. Good news is that the gestational sack was there and that no visible SCH was present.
My cervix is closed which is a good thing (means that I'm not currently miscarriage although I could have before the appointment.) And then they sent me for labs. I go back on Wednesday to get my next set and those will tell us a more complete story about this pregnancy.
Based on the information I have, I know it is not looking good. But a small part of me is still holding out hope, and that’s maybe the hardest part. This would be my second miscarriage, and I’m feeling so many things - sad, angry, frustrated, etc.
All that said, I’m sending you both my best thoughts. It’s nice to know others are maybe going through something similar and understand how it feels.
When I was pregnant with my daughter, I was sick and tired all the time and my boobs hurt like no other. Then suddenly one day I felt better and it scared the crap out of me. This was after we had our first scan, saw the sack and fetal pole. We even got to see her heartbeat. But the doctor wasn’t confident about viability because the heartbeat was low and so was my progesterone.
Deep down I knew something was wrong when my symptoms all but disappeared. I kept telling my husband something wasn’t right. We went to our second scan a couple of weeks later and received the bad news of a MMC.
Now with this new pregnancy, I have no idea if what I am feeling is that same gut feeling that something is wrong, or if my anxiety is reacting to the trauma of my previous loss. It’s scary when you can’t trust what you’re feeling!
The only thing that has helped me is talking to my friends that have gone through PAL. Every one of them have said that each of their pregnancies was different when it came to symptoms. Some even said that they had little to no symptoms at all in the first trimester and still had healthy babies after. So I’m holding onto hope that we see a healthy baby on our scan next week.
I’ll be hoping and praying for y’all too! 💗
I'll let you guys know how that goes.
I am going to log off the boards, as it feels a bit too painful with the added reminder.
Please keep me in your thoughts. I have my first scan on Monday and I’m super nervous.
Unfortunately, I also confirmed that my pregnancy is no longer viable. Hoping you all have happy and uneventful pregnancies. Maybe I will see some of you later. Good luck everyone. I will also be signing off. Bye!