I’m realizing that I’m in a really good place in my pregnancy where my energy has returned and I’m still relatively slim and mobile. What are tasks I should do now in preparation for the baby that might be more difficult to do later as I get bigger?
I know there is still time to decide, but I'm having a really difficult time trying to decide if I would like an elective c-section or another vaginal birth.
With my daughter, I had a fourth degree tear. The birth itself wasn't bad (quick, no epi and I did fine and know I could do it again), but recovery was bad, and it took at least a year to r fully heal.
Most doctors have recommended me to have a c-section, but several midwives have said thats silly, and I would be fine having another vaginal birth. There is a slight increase of tearing again, but not drastically. The problem is, if I have another 4dt, recovery is more tough the 2nd time around and I would have a higher chance of fecal incontinence, possibly forever.
Jump to c-section- still an awful recovery. If I have a successful vaginal delivery, the recovery would be easy. I'm also straight up terrified of major surgery! Like I legit feel like the worst possible outcome would happen to me. I know woman have c-sections everyday and they are super super common these days, I'm just scared.
Does anyone have a similar story or any words of wisdom for me?
@ttc3y any major changes in baby's room. Painting, putting the crib together, maybe towards the end of this tri, some frozen meal prep. That's all I can think of!
@nwshay I never tore as bad as that but I tore what felt pretty bad and I did have stitches the first time. With all my others I tore but it wasn't as bad. I didn't even have stitches the last two times and the pain afterwards was minimal in comparison with that first from number 2 and on. Your midwives probably have a good point. My sister on the other hand tore horribly with her 2nd and elected to have a c section with this 3rd because of it. Shes in her 40s and was pretty messed up from the 2nd birth however. I think if you don't have permanent damage, you have a really good chance of delivering vaginally without the same thing happening. I don't know what I would do in your shoes but I hope you settle on something that brings you peace.
@nwshay I’ve had one vaginal (with a small tear) and one emergency c-section now, and I’d honestly say that c-section seemed to heal a lot easier for me. Granted I have a scar, but overall, it took way less time to heal up and to safely return to sexual activity as well. I’m kind of feeling like I might opt for another c-section, but not totally sure yet. Keep me posted on what you decide to do!
@cpk3535 thank you for letting me know! That's good information to have! I know they happen all the time and are probably really safe, I'm just a worst case scenario kind of person 😬
@nwshay Yeah, honestly, after having a vaginal birth the first time, I kind of felt like I cheated with the ease of the c-section by comparison, lol 😂 I didn’t have to push, I only had to tend to myself in a different way from the first birth. The first birth with all of the pushing i felt like I’d run a marathon!!
My toddler is getting her second year molars in all the way now and she’s using been heavily nursing on me still as her binky. It’s getting so uncomfortable, but I want to help her out so I’m heavily moisturizing my nipples daily with shea butter and olive oil and just trying to muscle through. I feel like she’s close to stopping completely, and I’m pretty convinced I’m not producing any great amounts of milk aside from colostrum at this point. This is tough, because I don’t want to start her on a real binky at this age, so I’m just trying to make it through! Her older sister weaned and still occasionally sucks her finger as a relaxation technique. Any suggestions from returning mamas??
Another random- I had to take my daughters to the park the other night, and the one we ended up at was apparently crawling with mosquitoes who bit the crap out of my legs through my cheap maternity leggings. Should I contact my doc and ask if there’s any testing or anything I should do just to be safe? I got bitten about 6 times- I have delicious blood apparently, lol
@cpk3535 as far as mosquito bites go, it’s going to depend on where you are and what mosquito-born viruses are common in your area, if any. Zika is the biggest risk for pregnant people, but it’s very uncommon in most of the US. The other sort of common US virus is West Nile, which while not good for anyone is not known to affect the baby (unless of course you develop encephalitis and then it’s the medical care you need to stay alive that can cause harm). There’s also not really a treatment once you have them and testing generally isn’t considered worth it if you don’t have symptoms because risk is so low.
If you’re outside the US, there are other illnesses to be concerned about, but it’s very regional and I’m less familiar.
That said, there’s no harm in checking in with your doctor’s call line, since they’ll know what’s a specific concern in your area.
seeds_of_joy
member
Re: Weekly Randoms August 22
With my daughter, I had a fourth degree tear. The birth itself wasn't bad (quick, no epi and I did fine and know I could do it again), but recovery was bad, and it took at least a year to r fully heal.
Most doctors have recommended me to have a c-section, but several midwives have said thats silly, and I would be fine having another vaginal birth. There is a slight increase of tearing again, but not drastically. The problem is, if I have another 4dt, recovery is more tough the 2nd time around and I would have a higher chance of fecal incontinence, possibly forever.
Jump to c-section- still an awful recovery. If I have a successful vaginal delivery, the recovery would be easy. I'm also straight up terrified of major surgery! Like I legit feel like the worst possible outcome would happen to me. I know woman have c-sections everyday and they are super super common these days, I'm just scared.
Does anyone have a similar story or any words of wisdom for me?
That said, there’s no harm in checking in with your doctor’s call line, since they’ll know what’s a specific concern in your area.