February 2023 Moms

Large Age Gap

Saw this on another board 

I thought this would be a good place for those of us who are going to be navigating a large age gap between siblings can share our thoughts/feelings/experiences. 

Age of other child(ren):

What are you looking forward to with the age gap?:

Anything else you want to add:

Me- 25,DH-28

Anniversary

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


Re: Large Age Gap

  • St0v3sSt0v3s member
    Age of other child(ren): 6yo will be 7 a few days after due date 

    What are you looking forward to with the age gap?: He kinda already independent so I don’t have to worry about taking care of two toddlers together. Since they will never be in the same school together they will have their own orbits (friends, sports, interests)

    Anything else you want to add: but I’m also worried about them having a relationship. They will never been in the same school together 

    Me- 25,DH-28

    Anniversary

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers


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  • @runningyogimama we might tell them in a few weeks
  • Age of other child(ren): My DD will be 7 when baby is born

    What are you looking forward to with the age gap?: DD is so amazing with smaller children. She has a 1.5 year old cousin and is so patient with her when they play together. I look forward to DD having a little playmate. 

    Anything else you want to add: We probably won’t tell her for as long as we can due to our history of pregnancy loss until we are more confident and comfortable sharing the news. She’s lost a grandparent last September and a dog in February, both unexpectedly. I’d want to minimize any risk of more heartache in case things go sideways. 
  • nwshaynwshay member
    Age of other child(ren): my daughter is 5, will be almost 6 when baby is born

    What are you looking forward to with the age gap?: I'm looking forward to her understanding more about being gentle, and being able to help out a little. I was really hoping for a close age gap, but I think this will have more pros than cons. 

    Anything else you want to add: I just can't wait to tell her. She has been asking for a sibling every day for like 2 years, which has been so heartbreaking. 
  • I have an 18 year old, a 3 and a 2 year old. All boys. New baby also a boy.
  • 23 years when baby is born…still in complete shock.
  • @Paturkey My kids are so close in ages to yours!

    Age of other child(ren): 8.5 & 6 when baby is born.

    What are you looking forward to with the age gap?: Having two extra sets of hands to help!! I vividly remember potty training my DD while on maternity leave with DS and having to pop him off the boob and set him down to run her to the bathroom. Nightmare. I am trying to work with them now on things they are close to being self sufficient with so they can do them by themselves when baby comes if I am unable to help (making their lunches, bathtime, etc.)

    Anything else you want to add: DD & DS are best friends. Literally inseparable. Sleep together, play amazingly together, same friend group. I have some guilt of bringing in a new babe. I don't want the baby to feel left out when it's older and the older two are so close. I also have guilt of bringing in a new babe while my older two are so content with each other. I guess that's all normal and that feeling will go away when the baby gets here. 
  • Hi there. My daughter is 11yrs old, I'm 35 and 8 weeks pregnant.

    Looking forward to having my daughter's help. Hoping the age gaps is not too bad where they don't have a connection.
  • @seeds_of_joy our kids are similar ages! 
    I have a bigger gap between #2 and 3 (just under 3.5 years) because we were still living with my mom and both in school with no income. 😂 otherwise my kids are all 22-24 months apart.

    Age of other child(ren): 11,9,5,3,1 (will be 11,9,6,4,2 in Feb)

    What are you looking forward to with the age gap?:
    My girls (the older two) are so so excited. They knew about my ectopic pregnancy last fall and are very excited for us to have another baby even if it means a 4th little brother. They will be helpful. I have to be conscious about not burdening them with the care of their little siblings though.  

    I am worried about if they will be close. If this works out, this baby will be in Kindergarten when my oldest two are in 12th and 10th grade. They’ll probably move out while he/she is still in elementary school. I hope they will still have a strong bond. Hoping the bunch of other kids in there will help bridge the gap. 

    Anything else you want to add:
    DD1 6.2011 
    DD2 4.2013 - vbac
    DS1 9.2016 - vbac, team green
    Baby #4 due 9.2018
  • Oh and in terms of telling the kids. I didn’t tell the girls 9 and 11 but they (through an innocent mistake) discovered the pee stick pics on my phone so they knew very early on. 🤦🏻‍♀️ They also discovered the actual pee sticks when looking for my make up (that I never wear and hence hid the pee sticks with) last fall when I had a loss. I guess I stink at keeping the secret. We told the boys (5,3,1 who doesn’t understand) at 8 weeks after a good follow up ultrasound. I don’t mind them randomly telling some people. I think I feel a some pressure to talk openly about my 2 losses because I have had so much success with making babies overall. I don’t mind shedding some light on the subject. I have been very open about my most recent ectopic and I think I would do the same this time. The other reason for me not to share is that I don’t want people to feel like I’ve been pregnant forever come Feb… but let’s be real. This is my 8th pregnancy in 11 years. I have been pregnant forever! 😂
    DD1 6.2011 
    DD2 4.2013 - vbac
    DS1 9.2016 - vbac, team green
    Baby #4 due 9.2018
  • Age of other child(ren): (when baby is born) 21, 20, 18, 12

    What are you looking forward to with the age gap?: I guess that I can ask them to babysit sometimes. I'm not sure any of them are going to be impressed TBH

    Anything else you want to add: I thought I was FINALLY going to be able to start doing some things for myself and have a little freedom and then BAM, 2 lines. 
  • 15 and 10. 
    No clue.
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