TTCAL w/o 5.23

abjm0325 · May 2022

**This is a general trigger warning that CP, miscarriage / spontaneous abortion, selective abortion due to medical complications, and/or stillbirth may be mentioned.**

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.

Status:

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well?

Any testing coming up/any recent results?

Questions?

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you?

mambo5-2 · May 2022

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. A lot of losses, 5 or 6. Big loss twins 14 weeks in 2013

Status: BCP for IVF

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well? I'm more than half way through the BCP.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? Nothing

Questions? Nope

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you? I am so not a jewelry person, I do have a set of Emeralds that I love because I am a may baby.

annanbby · May 2022

@mambo5-2 yay for being half way through the BCP!

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. MMC April 2019, infant loss of my daughter at 4 months old in June 2021 due to heart and respiratory issues.

Status: TWW

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well? I'm not doing awesome this cycle, it was a rough weekend (see my chart rant in TWW Monday).

TW pregnancy:

Continuing with my struggles with my sister's announcement (this is her second child): It's so wild to me how carefree she is able to do be about pregnancy. They announced on social media at 9 weeks and have already started buying baby stuff. It's crazy how loss changes you, I could never announce so early or be so ready to baby shop.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? Nope.

Questions? Nope.

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you? My mother-in-law bought me this really sweet bracelet for Mother's Day this year that has a little pearl-like gem in it and a tiny butterfly charm. Butterflies are what our family uses to remember my daughter. I love it so much.

mambo5-2 · May 2022

@annanbby
We use butterflies a lot too. A pink one and a Blue One for my nuggets.

acleverusername · May 2022

@mambo5-2 half way done with BCP! That’s so awesome!

@annanbby that is so sweet about the whole family’s use of butterflies to remember your daughter. Also WTF your sister. I stated looking at stuff with this last pregnancy, but I couldn’t bring myself to hit “buy.” And now that’s probably going to get worse.

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. CP Sep 2021; MMC May 2022

Status: super benched, recovering from D&C

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well? Uh…I am grateful that I finally had the D&C. But I’m struggling with not being able to plan the next steps. Back in December, I had a solid plans: take 3 months off; mock cycle in March; transfer in April/May. Now I’m staring into a huge void. And I don't know how long that void is going to last. In any case, I've parked any decision making re: next steps until we get the genetic results back.

D&C recovery is otherwise going well, although I've been posting questions on r/Miscarriage and apparently it will get worse before it gets better so I'm buckling in for the ride.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? Just waiting for the genetic results for POC; should take about a week from tomorrow.

Questions? Not really.

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you? My late mother-in-law's wedding set. I never got to meet her as she passed a few years before I met MH. FIL offered the set when H told him he was going to propose, but H declined for whatever reason. I went and asked for it afterwards and FIL was so emotional in giving it to me (since I don't actually have an engagement ring; just a wedding ring).

I also just got myself a beautiful charm to remember my now 2 losses. It's a heart made of black shell with thorny twines running through it. Kind of symbolizes how my heart's is broken/protected.

mambo5-2 · May 2022

@acleverusername I hope your recovery goes well. I feel like my emotional recover from my D&C was worse than the physical recovery.

anniemarie887 · May 2022

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. well hello, now that i'm out of purgatory. CP in Sept 2021, MMC/D&C in Jan 2022, and then who knows was weird mess/D&C May 2022

Status: benched

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well? they are going, at this point happy to be moving in the right direction after the D&C last Monday. happy to be done bleeding and hopefully on the mend.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? waiting on chromosomal analysis from D&C, last time it took two weeks. then f/u w/my OB 5/31.

Questions? natm

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you? i have a small diamond necklace i have basically not taken off since our first married christmas.

@mambo5-2 my mom is also a may baby! she actually wanted an emerald engagement ring over a diamond!
@annanby big hug lady, and that was very thoughtful of your MIL
@acleverusername i hope the recovery stays easy for you, feel free to bounce any questions you might have off of me considering i've now had two of them. ugh. also that's great your genetics moves that fast!

wunderkai · May 2022

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc.
Had my first pregnancy and then MMC in Jan with a D&C.

Status: currently trying again, but this past month was a BFN.

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well? Just overall anxiety after the MMC and the fear of the unknown. I'm glad we are trying again though.

Any testing coming up/any recent results?

Questions?

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you? My mom passed away very suddenly in June of 2016 when I was 23. I have a necklace with her fingerprint on it and it means the absolute world to me. I feel like a part of her is always with me when I wear it.

bearmomma1 · May 2022

@mambo5-2 so close to being done! You should make a paper tear chain that you can help count down the days. Lol
@annanbby Pregnancy announcements are so rough, especially when they’re from someone we’re close to. We too use butterflies as our symbol for our son. A monarch flew through the hospital garden when our family got to meet our son and say goodbye at the same time.

@acleverusername I hope your recovery goes smoothly and that you can get back to creating a plan. A new plan is helpful in healing from a loss.

@anniemarie887 I’m so glad you’re out of purgatory and can start moving forward!
@wunderkai I love that necklace of your moms thumbprint. What a special reminder of her.

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. Preterm labor/infant loss Sept/Nov 2020, MC Jan 2022.

Status: WTO

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well? CD 1 again. Even with 1 follicle I for sure thought with our timing we nailed it last cycle. But alas, here we are. Bummed and cramping at the same time.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? Nope

Questions? Natm.

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you? After our son passed away, a friend group of mine got me a gold necklace with a “C” charm on it. I haven’t taken it off since. My H also got me a butterfly bracelet my first Mother’s Day after he passed that I’ll wear on special occasions when I want him there with me.

abjm0325 · May 2022

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis/conditions surrounding loss, etc. MC @ 8 weeks in Aug. 2021, CP in Dec. 2021

Status: TWW

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with and/or what is going well? I’m hopeful this cycle, which I kind of hate. I much prefer the cycles where I am feeling indifferent or pessimistic. Can’t get hurt if you don’t think it will actually happen, right?? Totally healthy of me, I know.

Any testing coming up/any recent results? If this cycle is unsuccessful, I head to the RE next cycle for an HSG.

Questions? Anything I need to do to prep for the HSG if needed? I should know if that’s the route we’re going by the beginning of next week.

GTKY: What is a piece of jewelry that you own (besides a wedding ring) that has special meaning for you? I have opal earrings that my father gave to my mother early in their relationship. They’re still alive and together, but she doesn’t have pierced ears any more and gifted them to me because opal is my birthstone. They always make me think of my parents and smile.

abjm0325 · May 2022

@mambo5-2 I love emeralds! I’m a sucker for birthstones in general for some reason.

@annanbby I’m so sorry about your sister’s announcement. It really is a totally different world on the other side of a loss. I hope you can give yourself some space or whatever you need while you process everything.

@acleverusername I am so glad you had the D&C and are recovering, but I can only imagine how unmoored you feel after being used to such long-term planning. Hopefully your RE will be ready to jump back into planning mode with you once you get the genetic results back. Also, I love your charm design.

@anniemarie887 So glad you are moving into the next phase of your recovery! I love that you always wear the necklace from your DH.

@wunderkai The necklace of your mom’s fingerprint sounds so special! I love that.

@bearmomma1 Ah, sorry for the BFN. I hate the letdown after feeling hopeful. So sweet of your friends and DH to think of special ways to memorialize your son.

maggiemadeit · May 2022

Instead of checking in this week, I am unfortunately checking out. After our 2 losses in the last 10 months my husband has decided that he no longer feels the same way, and he doesn’t want to try again. I am devastated, gutted, heartbroken. I guess I don’t go here anymore.

I just wanted to say thank you. You all have been a wonderful source of support at a really hard time. I’ve loved reading all your posts and comments, and commiserating about how shitty pregnancy loss is. I don’t think I would have started therapy without you all sharing your positive experiences. Thank you.

I hope that every one of you is able to have what your heart desires. I will be quietly rooting for you all from afar ❤️

acleverusername · May 2022

@maggiemadeit I am so sorry hun. I hope you can find peace with YH's point of view. And if that ever changes, we're here for you. Sending you hugs.

mambo5-2 · May 2022

@maggiemadeit
Hugs my friend. We are here if anything changes.

bbrahmbhatt · May 2022

@maggiemadeit sending you hugs. We're always here.

bearmomma1 · May 2022

@maggiemadeit I'm so sorry. lots of hugs coming your way.

abjm0325 · May 2022

@maggiemadeit We will miss you around here. Sending your lots of hugs and hoping you and your H can keep having talks until you both are on the same page moving forward.

anniemarie887 · May 2022

@wunderkai i love that necklace, i'm sorry for the reasoning that you have it
@bearmomma1 hugs, cd1 sucks
@abjm0325 all the fingers and toes crossed for you!
@maggiemadeit just sending you the biggest hug, i'm so sorry, no words can fix those feelings and you deserve to have all them

acleverusername · May 2022

Okay… I kinda effed up. H and I had drunken sex this past week. Like 5 days after the D&C. So erm… any advice? Emphasis on the fact that we were both drunk (which has been happening a lot more frequently these days and I’m not apologizing) so we didn’t exactly have control over our faculties.

abjm0325 · May 2022

@acleverusername Sorry if this answer is obvious, but what exactly are you concerned about? I'd be surprised if you were ovulating that soon after the D&C, but I suppose anything is possible.

acleverusername · May 2022

@abjm0325 mostly infection. Or the likelihood of it.

anniemarie887 · May 2022

@acleverusername honestly no idea, I assume like I’m pp the concern would be infection. Did you call TEW? Also, I was given doxy preop, then to take that night and the next day.

abjm0325 · May 2022

@acleverusername Ah, that makes sense. Hope you can get through to your doc soon to see if a preemptive antibiotic would be a good idea. Otherwise I guess just keep an eye on any possibly problematic symptoms you notice.

acleverusername · May 2022

Phew, apparently "sex is safe"! Wooo!

TTCAL w/o 5.23

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