Naming after family members

knottie799bbc3a6019971e · April 2022

In my family we are all named after family members, my first and middle are after my moms sister and dads sister; one brother is named after two of my uncles, and one brother is named after two of my grandfathers.

I would like to choose a first name and use a middle name that has meaning to us - but I’m having a hard time choosing without making others feel bad.

for example our boys name is Linden Robert (Robert is my husband’s fathers name) - and I’m worried my own dad would be offended… I actually know he would be he’s very, like that lol.

whereas the girls name I like is Maple Jean (Jean is my mothers middle name) and I’m worried my MIL would be offended…

what would you do? Would you do two middle names? Or would you just drop any family members names and use all original?

motherofahobbit · April 2022

I personally try to keep names original so family members feelings aren't hurt.

meggyme · April 2022

Call me superstitious, but I have a thing against naming kids in honor of living relatives. I guess there’s less drama that way.

paytonpedro · April 2022

I think you should just pick the names you like regardless of how anyone else feels about it. They’ll get over it.

Fwiw, my grandma, mother, sister and I have the same middle name. I’m having a little girl and it ends there. She isn’t getting the family middle name. And I’m not sure I care because she’s my daughter. I figure, they already got a chance to name babies and it’s my turn now so I’m going to pick what I like and not feel pressured into anything.

mb0112 · April 2022

I would have the same worries you did. I didn't use family names but agree using living family members is especially tricky. You could always plan to honor the other side "next time" but who knows if you have another child and same gender. I personally would feel really bad if I honored an in-law over my own parent.

krysnicole1022 · April 2022

I would never name after a living relative. I don't even like naming after someone. My son's middle name is technically my husband's grandfather's name (he died 35 years ago) but that was pure coincidence that we liked it. His family thought it was sweet and we just didn't tell them it was for the sweetness... (My husband is a born and bred Bears fan).

hazelmaus · April 2022

We have carried on the tradition of the middle name being from family members. Some of them are still alive. We found names we coincidentally had in both families and happened to really like (My grandpa's second name was my husband grandpa's first, my great-grandma's first name -who I was very close with-is also my MILs first). That being said if the name doesn't flow with our chosen first name we won't force it and may break tradition altogethe for our third now. It's a sweet gesture but moreso fun to tell your children about who those people were and to carry on some identity. Don't feel like you owe anyone-even your dad!

heather_tipps · April 2022

You could try combining names, if they are short enough. My mother’s middle name is Ann, and my MIL’s first name is Jane; so we have tossed around the idea of putting them together as a middle name for a girl, with our own twist: Annjanelle.

petuniapea · April 2022

I am choosing not to name my baby after any family members. I don’t want anyone to be offended, and I know there are other people in my family who would likely appreciate naming their kids after the same relatives. For example, my grandfather died last year and his birthday is right before our baby is due. His name would fit perfectly with the name we picked for our son, but I have cousins who would more likely appreciate being able to use his name when the time comes.

I’m also just not a huge fan of any names in my family 🤷‍♀️

turtletaylor0522 · April 2022

I would go with whatever name you feel most connected to…… But if you know it would REALLY hurt someone to the point of causing family problems, avoid it.

We are naming my son after both of my grandfathers, my dad’s stepfather (the only grandfather I’ve known on that side) and my mom’s dad. We figure we can use some names from my husband’s side of the family if we have another kid. My family is much bigger, much closer, and we have a long standing family-name tradition that his family doesn’t have.

abmiller19 · May 2022

I have had my names picked out even before we started trying. My girl name is my Grandmother’s middle name. It has been that for 15 years and she passed 3 years ago.
Amelia
My girl middle name has changed. It was Gene originally after my ex husband’s mom but we are divorced. Now it is Louise; which is both my husband’s Great grandma’s name and my own great grandmother’s middle name.
So girl is Amelia Louise
Boy names we have kind of went around with it was originally Craig Wyatt. So he would have the same initials as my husband. Craig is my dad’s name who passed away. Wyatt has no connection. We would have also called him Wyatt. My family hated that idea but oh well.
But that has since changed to Benjamin Craig. Benjamin being my husband’s grandfather’s name who he is really close with.
My philosophy is that it’s my child and you can’t make everyone happy. People’s feelings may get hurt but it’s not a personal thing at all. The child can only have so many names; it’s not like you can make everyone happy.

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