1st Trimester

Leave me alone

Hey so This is my first pregnancy, I’m 31 years old.. 8 weeks.. I was wondering does anyone else feel grossed out by their spouse/partner?! I sometimes feel like I don’t even want to be in the relationship anymore, as if I’m no longer attracted to my person..😩

Re: Leave me alone

  • Hey so This is my first pregnancy, I’m 31 years old.. 8 weeks.. I was wondering does anyone else feel grossed out by their spouse/partner?! I sometimes feel like I don’t even want to be in the relationship anymore, as if I’m no longer attracted to my person..😩
    There are deeper issues than being 8 weeks pregnant.  Please seek couples counseling,  counseling for you, or if you feel completely unattached maybe best to be open about your feelings and move on from there with your S/O.
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  • bunnieceebunniecee member
    edited April 2022
    The sudden change in hormones can definitely affect your feelings towards your partner but I would agree that talking to someone alone (or as a couple of there are things that bother you specifically with your relationship) would help you with processing all these new feelings and gaining some perspective about your situation. Things could be fine in the relationship and you still feel differently about your partner right now. Sometimes just having to explain your thoughts and feelings to someone else can give you some insight into what is the root of the problem. 
  • Talking it out with a professional is a good idea; but in the meantime, think about how often you’re feeling this way, and if there are specific moments when you really feel it, what it is that might be triggering that—is it that you don’t feel good and your partner doesn’t seem to recognize that? Do you feel like your partner isn’t doing enough to support you? 

    You can address the concrete things like “honey, I feel so queasy/tired/bloated I can’t even think about sex right now, and I hate turning you down. Can I just let you know if I’m up for it?” or “I’m just so overwhelmed by ____, I would really love it if you could _____ to save me a little energy.”

    I’ve had to do some of that this week because I’ve been so nauseous and not in the mood, and I’m only 6 weeks. Sometimes asking a little favor (can you get me some water, give me a hug, get the dishes for me tonight) has helped my husband and me to connect on that affectionate level.
  • I am also 8 weeks and often totally turned off by my partner. I feel fat and ugly and well unsexy. But he understands that and loves me anyways. We’re goin thru some serious sh** right now, girl!! I think personally it’s totally okay and understandable to not want to feel intimate or lovey with anyone! We’re in the midst of growing a baby! Plus our hormones are raging. But I agree, if you feel it’s deeper than that, it couldn’t help to seek outside help. Either via therapist or self help books or audios! Right now, I’m just feeling grossed out by everyone, everything and myself and very occasionally obsessed with my partner.
  • I feel like I’m going a little crazy!! Like today I broke down crying!! Of course he was there to comfort me when just last night I told him we needed time apart..😩.. he hasn’t done anything wrong to me.. but his house(which is also where I reside) makes me gag and sick.. it has a smell that I can’t get with.. so I hadn’t been staying there.. I’ve been an hour away at my family’s home.. and I feel as though we’ve been falling apart… but it’s really all my fault and I can’t control my bitchiness
  • Hey I hope you’re considering reaching out to counseling, you can also ask your doctor for recommendations…but most of all I think it’s important to communicate to the ones who love you. It’s going to get harder from here! You may find you need more support rather than less.
  • I feel this way also, but it’s more so because there’s several things I’ve asked him not to do that he just keeps saying he won’t but continue. One being.. smoking cigarettes, having them in my presence and smelling like them. It’s annoying and it makes me extremely nauseous. He keeps saying one thing than doing another. Then another thing is drinking alcohol. Now I don’t mind him having a drink every now n then because I loved me a glass of wine or two as well before being pregnant however I had to be strong enough to make those adjustments to ensure I have a healthy pregnancy. He claims to be so excited about the baby yet he can’t seem to make these sacrifices. I don’t understand it. I sometimes feel like I just need to stay away from him this entire pregnancy to not feel annoyed. 🤦🏾‍♀️
  • You are not the only one, I am 31 years old and 5 weeks pregnant and definitely consider myself happily married but I'm having extreme irritability but really only towards my husband. We've been together 14 years and this is baby number 4 so we know it'll pass but I really can't stand him. Him sleeping, talking, wanting sex doesn't matter I'm just not into it. Stay strong and patient with yourself and with him.
  • I’m having the same issue with the smell of the house (to the point that I think my complaints were driving him crazy!). I finally decided to hire a cleaner which made a big difference. They focused on the walls (for some reason I assumed that’s what was bothering me). They’re coming back for round 2 in a few weeks. I highly recommend it.
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