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September 2022 Moms
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PGAL Check-in 3/24

kboydbowmankboydbowman member
in September 2022 Moms
Due Date/Weeks:

Upcoming Appointments:

Doom Thoughts:

Hopeful Thoughts:

Questions/Concerns:

What's Your Self Care Plan for the Week?
Current pregnancy -
First BFP on 1/4/22.  Due date 9/13/22.

Four prior losses, no living children - 1 first trimester miscarriage, 1 blighted ovum, 1 chemical, and one extreme premature live birth daughter who died at 15 days old.


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Re: PGAL Check-in 3/24

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    melyraemelyrae member
    Instead of following the guideline, I just have a thought that might resonate. 

    I want to talk about and celebrate my pregnancy to my colleagues. But I also was SO uncomfortable when coworkers would talk about it when I was going through infertility and loss… And every time I talk about pregnancy or baby I feel bad. I don’t want to make others uncomfortable like I was. But I’m just so excited that it’s FINALLY my turn. 
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    babywiikbabywiik member
    edited March 2022
    TW:
    @melyrae completely understandable! It's not exactly the same situation but I have a friend who had a stillborn baby just a few months before I had my baby. We were both invited to another friends house when my baby was 1.5 months and I wanted to hide DD so I wouldn't cause this friend more pain. I found out later it was the first time she had been in the same room as a baby since her own was born. I was so worried that the other women there would make my daughter be the center of attention and I didn't want to come across as flaunting my baby when this friend didn't have hers. Thankfully everyone understood and I could sit in the background for the most part. In this case, we were aware that it would be a sensitive topic which isn't often the case with someone going through infertility and/or loss.
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    melyraemelyrae member
    @babywiik that’s such a tricky situation but I am glad everyone handled it so well! Im sure that was such a hard moment for your friend but you all made it much easier than it could have been 

    Not everyone at work knew my situation, and there were three women due the same month I would have been. It was really tough to hear people talk about these pregnancies so openly. Even to be asked “so are you next?” … I started avoiding the lunch room and staff socials. I just never ever want to make anyone feel the way that I did. And I know a couple women in my department struggle with fertility so I am very aware of what I say. 

    I also just never want to complain. Tbh I’ve felt like garbage most of this pregnancy but when anyone asks how I’m feeling I say “I’m fine! Grateful for even the crappiest symptoms”. But sometimes I want to complain when I feel like crap. Or celebrate when I don’t. 
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    blanket_girlblanket_girl member
    @melyrae I’m sure that your coworkers who are struggling appreciate your sensitivity. I’m sorry that you had to deal with those situations, though. 

    My cousin (who is one of my best friends) has been TTC for nearly a year, and I feel really guilty that we got pregnant the first month we tried. She always asks me about the pregnancy and about plans for when baby comes, so I try to talk about it as normally as possible, but I also am very conscious that it might hurt her to see my pregnancy progress while she is still waiting :( 
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    melyraemelyrae member
    @blanket_girl I think it’s important that you’re letting her bring it up! That’s sometimes even enough sensitivity that people need. 
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