Maternity Leave Discussion

itsme215 · January 2022

I hope this is okay for a stand-alone thread. If it’s not, let me know and I’ll take it to the questions thread! No hard feelings

For those that are working, what is your maternity leave policy? and how big is your company? How much time will you be taking? Paid? Unpaid? Will you work right up until you go into labor or take off a bit beforehand? Anything else you plan to do to prep your team for your absence?

Feel free to include policies from previous companies too if you’d like. I think it will be interesting to compare amongst the group!

and_peggy · January 2022

No maternity leave here. I have 4 tiny terrors that won’t allow it. It’s the worst policy 😆

itsme215 · January 2022

@and_peggy lol, perfect answer

itsme215 · January 2022

My company is tiny. There are 3 of us, soon to be 4. We have no policy. I told one of my partners today (the one who is the owner or the company), and he’s thrilled and was also like “okay sooooo guess you’ll be coming up with your own maternity leave policy then?” So, here we are.

maggiemadeit · January 2022

With #1, I was a grad student with absolutely zero agency, I got 8 weeks, even after a c-section, but I was paid my measly stipend during leave, so basically enough to buy ramen. They changed the policy to 16 weeks the following semester, I was pissed.

With #2, I had 12 weeks, but only the first 6 were paid, and I had enough vacation time to get paid for an additional 2 weeks. When I returned from leave my amazing boss at the time paid me a bonus in the exact amount of income I lost during leave. She rocks and I still miss her.

With this baby, I am self-employed working freelance, so I can finally decide how much leave I think is right for my family, but I won't be paid, so it comes down to what we can afford (still TBD).

With both #1 and #2 my husband had more paid leave than I did. Even though he did not have to grow a human, or feed them around the clock, or recover from a 4th degree tear or major surgery. Not complaining, family leave is amazing for any parent regardless of gender, he just happened to have much more supportive workplaces than I did when it came to parental leave.

I wish all families had the time they needed, without having to worry about losing jobs or income, or the long-term potential effects on career progression. I have A LOT of feelings on this topic, especially as it relates to being a woman in STEM, but I think this little novel is probably enough for tonight

itsme215 · January 2022

@maggiemadeit thanks for sharing, the novel is very helpful and I totally agree with your last paragraph!! I work in a heavily male-dominated industry and have worked really hard to get where I am so while I know my partners (both dudes with kids) will be super supportive, I can’t help but think about whether it will affect how the other teams we work closely with view me as compared to all the men. I told the boss today that I don’t see anything changing with my career goals long term and he assured me that I’ve definitely earned my job security for as long as I want it so I’m glad I don’t have to be concerned about that.

buffythevampireslayer · January 2022

I will have 12 weeks of paid leave, which has changed a lot since my first, who I had to take short term disability for and then any amount I wanted to get paid after that came from PTO. I feel very lucky but also everyone should get this regardless of where you work. I know I’ll be having a c section so I’ll need the time. I’m not sure what my husband will be doing yet, but probably not taking as much time off as he did with our first.

betsummerswilliams · January 2022

I’m on disability and unable to work. My state requires paid leave, even for fathers, so I’m thrilled about that! Also very frustrated because he hasn’t read his handbook yet to learn what they cover, or spoken to HR to feel it out before he tells his boss. He’s worried because we’re in an at-will employer state, but they just gave him a huge raise, it’s a great employer and he’s been there three years.

Reading your posts about fearing the work discussion helps me with understanding his fear and is helping me to access some empathy. Very grateful for this group!!!

geshem · January 2022

@and_peggy love it. I was a SAHM with #2 until I started teaching shortly before he turned 2.

For my first when I was in grad school I took the semester off, and accepted that I wouldn't get my stipend and we'd manage with DH's grad stipend. But then they said, because it was a particular fellowship, we have this money we've awarded to you, and if we don't give it to you it will stay in the account and the people who give it to us will say clearly you need less next year, so can we pay you anyway? I was like, that's weird but thank you very much I will gratefully accept!

Now I'm a high school teacher, and I hoped this baby might coincide with the beginning of summer but it happens when it happens and it will be practically the beginning of the school year. It will be only my second year teaching there (or at all) so I'm a little worried about telling them. Any teachers here have advice of when to tell? ASAP so they have time to find a sub? After they've committed to hiring me back in next year? They are also considering adding a new elective in my specialty next year and I really don't want to lose the opportunity to develop and teach the class.

ashamarie2 · January 2022

I will have 12 weeks paid leave, but not at my full wage, I think at like 60%. I do not plan on going back to work until after I graduate nursing school, and I will be taking leave about 6 weeks before my due date. I am truly counting down the days until I can quit my h3ll h0l3 of a job. There’s no way I could mentally make it up until the due date!

I don’t believe my partner will be taking paternity leave, he works from home and doesn’t want to take the pay cut (understandably since he will be covering all the expenses).

knottiedc79e391e52f85c0 · January 2022

I have one year paid leave, and my work will top me up for 5 months which is really nice!

geshem · January 2022

One year!? I'm guessing you must not live in the US. Your work sounds very nice. Enjoy your leave!

leahrnmom · January 2022

I will have 6 weeks of short term disability paid at 60%. Then my work started offed 2 weeks paid at our full amount. I will take 12 weeks and the rest will be PTO time. I bought pto this year to have enough.

sarahdaley11 · January 2022

The hospital I work at actually has a great maternity leave policy because it’s the Federal government. We get 12 weeks paid that can start before birth if we opt and we also have the option of taking some and trickling the rest back in. So if I wanted to come back to work 2 days a week I could use one maternity day to supplement and be part time for a while.

wisewitch222 · January 2022

I'm part time, so no paid leave here. But I do have a guarantee that my job will still be waiting for me in January and I'll be able to stay connected during leave if I want to (I'll still be on the email list but won't be obligated to go to any meetings), and that's about the best I can ask for as a part-timer. I mentioned yesterday in "Told" that I talked to my boss yesterday and that conversation went really well and I'll be looking forward to going back next January.

laddy12 · January 2022

For my first, I had to use 2 weeks of sick time then got 4 weeks of 60% pay from STD then used the almost 5 weeks of vacation I had saved up before going unpaid for another 1-2 weeks. So when I got back to work, I had pretty much no PTO remaining. It was just great (not).

For this one, I should be able to get 2 weeks of paid time from my company and then 80% pay for 12 weeks from STD but I’m not positive it is going to work out because our company was just acquired and I’m not sure how all the benefits are going work when we switch to the new parent company policies in July. I need to get it all squared away with HR when I’m ready to share the news. I also plan on only going back 4 days/week (32 hours) for several months after I go back to work.

My husband has 3 weeks of paid parental leave then will take at least 1-2 more weeks of PTO.

mdfarmchick · January 2022

I’m with @and_peggy… I have three terrorists so there’s no time off for me. But MH gets 7 weeks of paid time off right now and it may be 12 by this summer. Depends on when the policy goes into effect and if they backdate it like they did last time. I’m hoping for the 12 week policy that can be spread out actually. But either way, I know we are very fortunate for him to have that time and it is so needed. I’m also waiting on whether we will be moving this summer or not… because that changes what we do as far as when he takes his paternity leave.

arimelo · January 2022

@geshem I’m also a teacher and my due date is early August, so I totally hear your concerns. Telling them as soon as you feel comfortable is a good idea. Nowadays schools are losing so many teachers, that I think you won’t have a problem coming back in the fall/winter.
with my 1st I only had 3 months of unpaid leave and it was rough going back. Now I’m thinking of taking a 6 month personal leave bc I’ll have my hands full with a newborn and toddler. But it’ll be challenging financially. Good luck to all!

lillim821 · January 2022

I work at a fairly large company. Up until a few years ago, you had to use disability for maternity leave. But thankfully, they changed that policy and now we get 16 weeks paid leave. The nice thing is you can tack on vacation/PTO at the end of the 16 weeks which I definitely think I'll do. That way, I can extend my leave until the end of the year and join back on the team in 2023. Feels cleaner than coming back right before the holidays when everyone normally takes off anyways.
I haven't told my team yet, mostly because I'm holding out for the results of a promotion. But I do plan to tell them pretty early on in 2nd trimester so they can plan who will cover for me/if they need to bring anyone new into the team. I've been training one of the junior engineers on my team, so I'm hoping by the time August comes around he'll be in a good spot to fill in for me while I'm out.

bridgiebee82 · January 2022

I'm trying to figure out when to tell my principal I won't be returning for next school year. I already know that one baby is overwhelming. With twins, we won't be able to afford childcare. It'll just be better if I stay home full time. I hate to disappoint my colleagues and I love my school. I just know that being a SAHM is what I need to do. It's the "when do I tell my boss I'm not coming back" part. She already knows I'm pregnant and is overjoyed for me.

wine_mama_03 · January 2022

I always enjoy reading these, especially for the different fields of work. I'm in research and we just recently (thankfully just in time) got with the times and increased ours from 6-8 weeks of fully paid short term disability to that plus 6 week parental leave for bonding that can be used within the first year (although it has to be used all together). I had just looked up other companies in our same industry on Glassdoor last summer and they all had at least 12 weeks, while we only had 6, so I'm glad we've caught up with everyone else.

darkrose88 · January 2022

With DS I got 6 weeks of STD @ 100%, and then was able to take 4 weeks of PTO off, for a total of 10 weeks fully paid leave. It was a pretty great, except I had DS in January so had no PTO the rest of the year and was pretty miserable having no time off at all. Sadly, that company was sold, and as I'm the sole income provider for my family, I made the decision to leave as I was worried about layoffs.

My current place offers STD @ 80% for 6 weeks, 2 weeks of 100% pay for maternity leave, and then any other time I'd need to use PTO. I am fully remote, so I'm leaning on only taking the 8 paid weeks, and then going back to work. I'm saving up for the time I'm at 80% and also for additional weeks if I decide I need extra time with baby as we get closer.

hws80622 · January 2022

I think I might have it pretty lucky…we get 20 weeks paid maternity and 5 weeks additional unpaid as optional.

My husband works for a diff company but he gets 20 weeks paternity

We both work in design/tech

bridgiebee82 · January 2022

Well, I didn't check my school mailbox on Friday before leaving. Apparently our letters of intent to return are in there and due back by January 31. I guess I have to talk to my principal before then. I'm really frustrated because I wasn't anticipating getting this letter until April. I know it's hard to find teachers right now, but I'm at a whole new level of anxious. We have a fantastic faculty. I love where I work. It's the first school I've ever felt home. But I know I don't make enough money there for childcare, and my principal has a tendency to flip her switch if you do something she doesn't like. These aren't contracts, but now I worry that she will be treating me differently. That's a long time to go through that, and I even left a school midyear because the principal was harassing me.

ETA: I guess this could have gone in the venting thread instead.

wisewitch222 · January 2022

@bridgiebee82 that is really strange. My spouse teaches at a Catholic high school and they have contract signing day in June - that’s it. If you don’t intend to come back, you can tell the principal that on contract signing day and they still have the whole summer to hire your replacement (which is a breeze compared to teachers giving two weeks notice mid-year). It seems strange that they would ask you that this year of all years when teachers are constantly quitting and there are more vacancies in higher paying public schools that they would ask you this now. What do they expect to do with the extra four months? It makes no sense, and if I were you and worried about treatment, I would say I did intend to return after 12 weeks maternity leave, and then at contract time just say I changed my mind. You *could* still be considering that option.

mdfarmchick · January 2022

@bridgiebee82, I agree with @wisewitch222… you can “consider” that option until it’s time to actually sign the contracts. I even know people who changed their minds about going back on week 10 of their 12 weeks of time home with baby.

darkrose88 · January 2022

@bridgiebee82 I don't gave experience in the education field. But like @mdfarmchick mentioned earlier, I 100% know ladies who waited until week 10 of maternity leave to turn in their 2 week notice. Actually one of my really close friends did this. She had plans to return, including childcare lined up, and then towards the end of her leave decided that wasn't the life she wanted. It is not an uncommon practice in the industries I've worked in. 🤷‍♀️

michelle081822 · January 2022

I am planning on taking 15 weeks! My company is pretty dead at the end of the year, so coming back fresh Jan 1 is perfect. It will be a mix of fully paid, then partial. Knowing that in advance, we have saved plenty to cover the difference.

My husband will then take a few weeks in the new year + our in-laws help to delay day care start to February when baby is 6 mo. That is my dream!

FYI I have heard payouts can be very delayed if you have to file for short term disability through work (at least we do in NJ). Hope that's helpful for someone out there!

bridgiebee82 · January 2022

@michelle081822 I live in NJ but I work in Philly at a Catholic school. I've been trying to find the maternity leave guidelines for the Archdiocese to no avail. MH's job has a lot of overtime coming up and he has seniority so we are hoping to save up a bunch too.

coco2787 · January 2022

Just bumping this 👊🏻

bridgiebee82 · January 2022

I get 12 weeks of unpaid maternity leave, and have to use up my sick days first. LOL MH gets 6 weeks paid paternity leave. I just can't.

darkrose88 · January 2022

@bridgiebee82 ugh, I'm so sorry. I'm also surprised you don't have any kind of short term disability plan. I thought most companies offered that.

brittanynmorris · January 2022

I've avoided this thread like the plauge. I know the US is terrible in general for maternity leaves. I'm having a hard time with mine, especially since I teach and it'll be at the beginning of the school year. Technically, we are a "generous" district that allows 2 weeks over the mandated 6, for a total of 40 days potentially paid. I'm thankful for that, but it's because I've had to come to work sick (pre-COVID) to save up enough days for maternity leave, since I only get an allotted amount each year. So, my "sick" bank will be used for reproducing and potenitally adding more students to the public school system and not used when I'm actually sick. I know I'm not in this alone and PLENTY of educators and others have similar situations but it just really rubs me the wrong way. It is also another way the gender gap makes a presence by male teachers not having to save their sick bank to have children. And it's not a big deal if they have to quarantine, when any day that I have saved is precious and already planned to be used in a different way (already having to save for baby #2). Don't get me started on COVID affecting my sick bank as well...

Anyway, I could just talk in circles about this forever, I will be taking my entire 40 days paid and most likely 4 additional weeks unpaid (if the all male school board approves that *insert eyeroll here*). That would get me to the end of November, with about three weeks back teaching before winter break. Then, I'll be back full time in January for the rest of the school year.

I know everything will work out and it won't matter when I have my little babe in my hands, but right now it's causing a lot of stress, anxiousness, and bitterness.

wine_mama_03 · January 2022

My husband found out this week that their parental leave is very loosely written and he can have 16 weeks parental leave, which is fantastic, but now I'm jealous because I will only have 12! I realize we are both very lucky in this though, so I can't complain, just jealous that he somehow gets more time than I do!

tmartin014 · February 2022

I know I’m late to the party on this thread, but wanted to chime in! I work in a small office (5 people). I get 6 weeks paid and can take up to an additional 6 weeks unpaid. I took 9 weeks with my first baby and my boss wound up paying the entire 9 weeks- my daughter was in the NICU 6 weeks and my boss really is a great guy. Haven’t really sat down and discussed what we will do this time, but I would be fine with the 9 weeks again. My husband works from home (journalist) with a flexible schedule and an understanding boss so we are definitely luckier than a lot of people.

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