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September 2022 Moms
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Saving for baby & Creating a will

lucyg00cylucyg00cy member
in September 2022 Moms
Has anyone else been looking into setting up savings for their future little one(s)? What about wills? Has anyone begun to think about who they’d make as legal guardian of their child(children)? 

I have started to think about these things, but I have no idea when to really start or who should be a guardian(s). I have no siblings and while I love my partners family I don’t trust any of his siblings to take care of a child (they are much younger and don’t even fully take care of themselves, let alone pay their own bills). This leaves our parents, but then it’s like which side to we pick? Can we select all of our parents? Will there be drama? We both have wonderful friends who are like family, but is it fair to speak with them about something this significant? 


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Re: Saving for baby & Creating a will

  • trapperkeeper87trapperkeeper87 member
    We met with an estate lawyer and these are all great questions they can help you answer. At the end of the day, it isn't about sparing someone's feelings; it's about having a guardian that you know can 100% love and provide for your child in the way you would want the child cared for should you and your significant other pass away.
    DD 10/2019
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  • babywiikbabywiik member
    Also, if you choose someone, that can take the drama away from grandparents having to choose later. I've though about this same thing. I live on the other side of the world from most of my family. If something were to happen to us, I'd like one of my sisters to raise our kids but if we're living here still, it'll be easier I'd imagine for kids to not have to move half way across the world on top of loosing parents. I suppose kids are resilient and would manage either way. Just hard to know what the best thing for them would be.
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  • lucyg00cylucyg00cy member
    I totally agree with you both- and thank you for replying! it’s an important thing to think about and it’s so tough to know that some might be upset no matter what you decide to do. It’s also just so hard to think through what their life would look like without both of their parents. I feel like I want to cry every time I do think about it. That might be the hormones too 🙈

    I definitely think I want to speak with a professional to set something up, I’ve seen free online will creation sites but that just seems risky considering we’ve never done it before and there’s a lot at stake. 

    On the bright side I’m not due until September so plenty of time to think it all through I guess!
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  • beccaneubeccaneu member
    When we put our estate plan together after the birth of our son, there were so many hurt feelings.  Big family drama and accusations all around.  It was honestly just the worst, but I’m happy with our decisions and glad we didn’t let ourselves be bullied into changing things.  Make sure you are happy with the guardian you choose, and don’t worry about the other stuff.
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