June 2022 Moms

If you have a partner, did they go to your first ultrasound?

I have an appointment booked for a 9-week ultrasound (dating). It will be my first one, as where I’m from earlier ones are only offered if you’re high risk. I’m 26, healthy, and have no red flags otherwise. 

It’s not that I don’t want my husband to come, or that I don’t feel comfortable having him there, or anything like that. I just don’t feel like this early on when there’s so many maybes, and the baby is still so small, that it’s worth it. He feels the same way but will definitely come to the second one I’ll be getting around 20 weeks. 

I know this is all fine and it’s our choice, but I’m just curious as to whether or not it’s common for people to bring their partner to one so early on (because when I booked my appointment they asked if I’d be bringing a partner), and if so, what is/was your reasoning?  

It’s our first baby so I’m just looking to learn a little bit from the community in case there’s something I’m missing or may regret down the line sort of thing! Thanks!

Re: If you have a partner, did they go to your first ultrasound?

  • I got a 6 week ultrasound and my husband was there! I wanted him for the support in case the tech couldn't find the baby / a heartbeat / told me something was wrong. He also wanted to be there to see our baby's heartbeat for the first time 💖 I feel like it was a special experience and I got to share it with him, it made both of us feel like he's more involved.
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  • I had my 9 week ultrasound on the 29th and we decided it was okay if he missed this one. I figured if he was going to miss work or have us get a sitter for our youngest it should be for the “fun” one at 20 weeks. Since at that point it looks more like an actual baby. My doctors office said they don’t listen to the heartbeat till later on so we didn’t get to hear it only see it only see it on the screen.

     For our first baby we were 19. So it’s been awhile, but I’m pretty sure he went to the first ultrasound. 
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  • My husband wasn’t there for the initial one to see the sac but he came to my last one to hear the heartbeat and be there for support. I wanted him there to experience hearing the heartbeat with me for the first time or for support in the event something was wrong. 
    ***History & TW in Spoiler***

    ***bfp & child warning***
    TTC - since 2014
    7 rounds of Clomid - BFN
    IUI #1 - October 2015 - BFN
    IUI #2 - November 2015 - BFN
    IUI #3 - December 2015 - BFN
    IVF #1 - March 2016
    Retrieval #1 - April 2016
    FET #1 - May 2016 - BFP!!! DS - Born January 2017
    Trying for baby #2...
    FET #2 - January 2018 - BFN  
    No more embryos left; switched to a new RE
    IVF/Retrieval #2 - January 2019
    IVF/Retrieval #3 - March 2019
    FET #3 - April 2019 - BFP!!! - DD: Born December 2019
    Trying for baby #3...
    FET #4 - October 2021 - BFP!!! - Due June 2022


  • okay so this is going to probably be an unpopular opinion but I didn’t want my partner there because in case there was something wrong I did not want to have to comfort someone else. I wanted to be able to process it first and then share any bad news after I had time to react. Of course support is great but I would rather have that from someone who I don’t have to support. 
  • My husband came for the first two (IVF pregnancy so we had early ones) but he is not coming to my 9 week tomorrow 
  • With our first my husband was there and was really excited to be there.  This time however, it was early in the afternoon and he was at work unfortunately.  But he really wanted to go.
  • My clinic doesn't allow anyone to go into the room, but I would have liked to have my husband in there.
  • I definitely want my husband there. Especially since our with our last pregnancy, it wasn’t good news at the first ultrasound. Right now I’m still unsure if they will allow visitors with me for the appt. I’m set to have my first ultrasound at 8 weeks next Thursday. I’ll be calling tomorrow to check as well as Tuesday/Wednesday next week
  • I had my first ultrasound yesterday and it’s my first pregnancy.  I had my boyfriend with me.  We thankfully got good news and it was wonderful to experience that together and to see the heartbeat. But the main reason I wanted him there was to make sure I asked all my questions and so I could have a second set of ears on the answers. It was really helpful!
  • Yes! I couldn’t have imagined my husband not being there. We had our first US at 8+1 and it was so sweet seeing him tear up. He plans on coming to every appointment with me, but he is self-employed so he has that flexibility. 
  • For my OB, the first appointment at 9 weeks is also the time when she takes family medical history for anything that could impact either the baby’s development or the pregnancy. He knows what’s happened in his family and his answers to the questions are as important as mine. So yes, we go together for the first appointment even though I don’t have red flags either. 
  • I want my partner with me in all of them. I don't have family or friends here, so he is my only person. 
  • This is my first pregnancy. I want my husband there for emotional support but also so he is involved and knows what’s going on. I think it will get real for him once he sees the ultrasound. It’s really important for me that he knows what’s going on with me and the baby and understands the process and journey we are embarking by on. I don’t expect him to go to all the appointments but I think this first one is critical. 
  • @fluteling

    My husband was adopted and has no clue about his medical history haha. We also don’t get doctors to do them where I’m from. Your doctor has to refer you to the radiology place where a sonographer performs them separately and sends the summary to your doctor so I already have done all the family history questions and what not. It’s literally just the imaging for dating. Haha. 
  • For my first I was high risk and had a ton of ultrasounds so my mom came to a few and my husband came for a few but mostly they were so frequent I went to most alone. 

    For my second I think my mom came to one and my hubby came to one but I went to the other couple on my own. 

    This time I had an early one I went to by myself because my mom was watching the kids and hubs was on a business trip. But he’ll be at my next one. I dint know what else he’ll make it to. I don’t mind either way. It’s the third one and I get pictures to show him haha. 

    I’m glad so many husband last have been able to make them so far for you all! 
  • Called today and due to Covid, I have to go alone. They recommended FaceTime but to me, that’s not the same as being there in person. More nervous about going alone now that I don’t have a choice. I doubt it’ll change but will call and check again next week before the appt. 
  • @yooleeah oh no! I’m sorry! I’d gladly switch you countries if I could (Unless you’re from the USA lol. Jk. ……Kind of.) Jokes aside, that really sucks!! You mentioned wanting him there so I’m really sorry and I hope the rules change!! That’s nuts you can’t have your husband in for an ultrasound. Yikes. COVID must be bad where you are. Stay healthy!! :(

  • @tmarie0805 things were closed, then opened again and now things are closed/limited again. Just sucks overall. He thought he couldn’t go either way and when I reminded him, he said he had work either way. He’ll be available for FaceTime at least. With all these hormones, I’m just more emotional. Like others have said, some days are worse than others with being so emotional. 

    Thank you for the kind words. And yes, I would swap you if you ever want to live in the US, I’m down 
  • I went in to confirm pregnancy (I've had 5 false positives before,  crazy I know!) So I went in just to check but expected bad news. Low and behold the ultrasound showed I was 6 weeks along! Wish he had been with me cos I was overjoyed to see a lil bean on the monitor. Def want him with me at the next one. 
  • My husband has always come to the early ones with my pregnancies simply for support incase I receive bad news. However, I don't see anything wrong with yours not joining if you are both on the same page!
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