Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
elksamm
member
Re: Weekly Check-In 10/11
How far along are you//EDD: 24+2// Jan 29th // STM
Size of the baby: pomegranate
Upcoming appointments: 24 week with NP tomorrow - actually have a few questions: I've heard more about a standard of baby aspirin during pregnancy and want to see what if it's something I should add. Also, sleep has been a bit more challenging, but I sleep well when I'm mostly (as much as I can) be on my stomach, and want to make sure that's ok.
How are you feeling?: I'm over pregnancy and ready for this baby. I'm fairly lucky i know when it comes to pregnancy but the past 24+ weeks have felt long and need the next 16 to go faster. Hopefully with the holidays coming up they will.
Rants/Raves: you might have inferred it from above, but I've lost all patience. Everyone and everything is annoying me. Just the smallest things that don't matter. it's like i woke up on the wrong side of the bed for the past 5 days.
Questions: n/a
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to? Had amazing tickets to an NFL game from MH's work one time, we were 3 rows up on the 50 and i swear i could touch the players they were so close. It was incredible.
How far along are you//EDD: 27+5/January 5
Size of the baby: lettuce
Upcoming appointments: ultrasound on Thursday
How are you feeling?: Uncomfortable laying down because the baby moves like a mad woman. I also am getting a stretching-type of pain in my side if I try to walk with any sort of efficiency/speed. That's pretty usual for me during later pregnancy.
Rants/Raves: We had a pretty good weekend. The boys did well at swim lessons, and we took them to a local amusement park that does special Halloween stuff during October. We stayed out pretty late, but the kids were well-behaved and had a great time. It's so much fun to see them have fun. The amusement park is really geared to smaller kids, which is awesome for them, but kinda meh for adults, haha. They had a live show that was pretty low-rent but whatever, it's not Disneyland, and the kids freaking LOVED it. Looking forward to going back again before Halloween.
It's also my little guy's 3rd birthday this week, so I have a ton of stuff to do to get ready for it. We aren't really doing anything big, just a party with immediate family, but I still want to make it special, so I bought a ton of Halloween decorations to put up here for a fun surprise when he wakes up on his birthday on Wednesday, and then more decorations for my parents' house for the actual "party". Plus baking cupcakes and figuring out food.
Questions: nope
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to? I'll describe a concert and a sporting event. The best concert was Smashing Pumpkins at the Fillmore in SF in 2007. They have been my favorite band since like 1995, but I had never gotten a chance to see them play, and 2007 was the first time seeing them. I took my brother, who also was a big fan, and they played for like 3 hours or something crazy. The Fillmore is a pretty small venue, relatively speaking, so that was nice, and everyone was singing along to every song. I cried. I'm ridiculous I know, but it was a big deal - Smashing Pumpkins probably helped shift my life trajectory more than any other factor growing up.
Sporting event was seeing the Kings win the Stanley Cup in 2012. Their whole playoff run was magical, and we decided to drive down to LA to see them win. Again, I cried. I have been a Kings fan since the end of the lockout in 2005 (I think) and I had seen some REALLY bad seasons come and go. Anyway, saw them win, then got back in the car and drove 6 hours in the middle of the night to come back home because we had to work the next day. Exhausting, but so worth it.
How far along are you//EDD: 26w2d/January 15
Size of the baby: A bunch of kale/acorn squash
Upcoming appointments: 3-hr glucose tomorrow (wah!) and 28-wk OB appointment on 10/28.
How are you feeling?: Large and it's getting harder to move around. Even walking I need to catch my breath, and the leg cramps are real. Sleeping is...interesting. Also, I get very weird tenderness/pain in my bellybutton sometimes, even though it isn't fully popped out.
Rants/Raves: Work is annoying. Sometimes I think labor is preferable to some of the BS I deal with...Raves, DH put the crib together this weekend and the bassinet arrived! The stroller and carseat are on order. It's insane how fast things are moving.
Questions: STM+s, is it normal to feel deep kicks in the recesses of your vagina and rectum? Sometimes it leaves me breathless.
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to? Backstreet Boys in the summer of 2018! Or Lady GaGa at Citi Field in 2017.
How far along are you//EDD: 25w/Jan 24
Size of the baby: cauliflower
Upcoming appointments: in 3 weeks I have my OB appointment and GD test
How are you feeling?: feeling pretty good compared to the previous months. I have more energy and have been able to focus more at work. Sleep is pretty good but I wake up several times a night to switch sides with mild leg cramps. My chest is getting more squished between my stomach and my boobs and sneezing is not fun. I also feel like I am peeing SO frequently.
Rants/Raves: work has been challenging this past quarter due to feeling like crap and lack of leadership but there have been some changes at work that have made it so much better and I’m enjoying it again.
Questions: is anyone dressing up for Halloween? If so, what’s your costume?
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to? Best sporting event would have to be the first game back in the Super Dome after hurricane Katrina for Monday Night Football. Best concert was either John Buttler Trio at the Ryman in Nashville, my seat was about 10 feet away from John Buttler and seeing him play the guitar was really cool or seeing the Chainsmokers a week after listening to their latest album non stop on a trip with H before we were married. It wasn’t the most amazing musical performance but just so much fun and such a happy memory.
How far along are you//EDD: 28w2d (1/1)
Size of the baby: eggplant/coconut
Upcoming appointments: 3hr glucose Wed 😥 and 30w appointment on 10/25
How are you feeling?: Good! Lots of baby movement. Not many negative symptoms other than peeing a lot and occasionally getting a sore spot around my belly button.
Rants/Raves: Rant- I failed the 1hr glucose and have to do the 3hr on Wed. I hate blood draws (and finger pricks are even worse), so the thought of having it done 4 times is anxiety inducing for me.
Rave- I used my glucose appointment as an excuse to take the afternoon off ☺️ also since I have a student teacher I don't have to leave as detailed sub plans as usual. Also I got a project that I've had on my nursery to-do done last night: crib rail cover and skirt. After almost 7 years away from a sewing machine, I still remember how to use it!
Questions: is anyone else still completely undecided on a name?
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to?
Maybe not the best, but the most memorable is when me, and a group of 5 friends (including DH) piled into 1 car at 10pm for a very impromptu trip to the Bears vs Seahawks game in Chicago. We scalped tickets on the way there and stopped at a casino too. Didn't sleep at all. Also didn't realize that liquor stores in IL don't open until like 11am or something like that so we basically tailgated sober. Oh and it was FREEZING out. We were back home after less than 24hrs of being gone. Not the best game by any stretch of the imagination, but one we'll remember forever!
Baby Girl Due: 1-1-22
@elksamm no costume for me, but I did buy a maternity shirt that says "Winnie, I smell a child" 😆 I also bought candy...for the trick-or-treaters, of course!
@magalina_h I feel like we decided on a name really early. It just kind of fit. Now the hard part has been keeping it a secret. We don't want to tell anyone until the baby is here. Also, I love your sewing project! I can't wait to break out my sewing machine to make some stuff for baby. You've inspired me 😊
@blackhottamales I feel you about waking up on the wrong side of the bed constantly. I'm so annoyed with everyone. I recently snapped at my Dad for making a stupid joke. 😩 (worst part, I only feel a little bit bad about it).
How far along are you//EDD: 25w5d // Jan 20
Size of the baby: cauliflower
Upcoming appointments: end of the month. GD test.
How are you feeling?: still feel like a fire breathing dragon due to crazy intense heartburn. Plus the ever so fun constipation. My feet have been swelling too. I think that was brought on mostly by excessive walking when we moved.
Rants/Raves: I'm so moody. Every little comment irritates me. I don't like being this way but I can't stop! Rave - we finally moved!!!! I'm so excited to start setting things up for this baby.
Questions: can we talk about how to deal with hemorrhoids? Help!
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to?
Ugh, too many to choose from. One of the first things that pops into my mind is watching Michael Jordan play on the Wizards at the very very end of his career. He may have been old and strapping giant ice packs to his knees on the sidelines but he was still incredible to see live. And speaking of almost end of career moments, I also got to see Phil Collins on his "Not Dead Yet" tour. He sat for the whole concert and his son played the drums, but it was still amazing!
How far along are you//EDD: 24Weeks 6Days 1/26/22
Size of the baby: Cantaloupe
Upcoming appointments: This Friday with MFM @ 8:45AM Growth Scan and @ 10:45AM with regular OB
How are you feeling?: Have horrible heartburn every morning until I eat lunch. I tried eating just a bagel still had heartburn. I tried eating nothing still had heartburn. After I eat lunch it goes away. I am also tossing and turning all night. I get pain in my back or my belly if I'm on one side for too long. Other than those two issues I'm feeling pretty good.
Rants/Raves: Rants: I went to see my Kidney Dr. Friday and everything went great but to be on the safe side he wants my blood pressure checked once per week and urine/blood once per month until I deliver. On top of that I got to MFM and my regular OB. I have so many appointments I'm losing my mind.
Raves: On the plus side my blood pressure has been great 110/70 last Friday and all my blood work and urine has been coming back good as well.
Questions: NATM
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to? Can't think of one that was the best but Live 8 in Philly was fun not so much the concert, but the walking around and food afterwards was.
How far along are you//EDD: 25+2
Size of the baby: cauliflower?
Upcoming appointments: OB next week
How are you feeling?: large. Overall ok. Braxton hicks are a bitch, and so is heartburn. I now just take 2 Tums at bedtime so I'm not woken up with heartburn.
Rants/Raves: since starting to solely work from home, I've been trying to find some activity one evening per week to go to. I live in a small town, where there isn't much/anything to choose from, and I'm getting annoyed.
I carved out some time over the long weekend to sew some grow-with-me pants for my son, and will be making a few things for the baby soon. It's nice to have some sort of outlet.
Questions: nope
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to? Not much of a concert person, and I haven't attended a tonne of sporting events. I couldn't even throw out a contender here.
How far along are you//EDD: 27+2, Due Jan 9th
Size of the baby: bunch of bananas
Upcoming appointments: Echo and Cardiologist this Friday; growth ultrasound, glucose tolerance test, and TDaP booster next week
How are you feeling?: Okay, my SI dysfunction is doing better with an SI belt, but dealing with more back pain
Rants/Raves: people treating me like I'm some sort of invalid because I'm pregnant.
Questions: none
GTKY: what’s the best concert/sporting event you've ever been to? I have more memories of the road trips with friends to get to concerts than the concerts themselves
Baby Girl Due: 1-1-22