Book Recommendations

willowhisper · September 2021

What are all you mamas reading?
So far I've read (and thoroughly enjoyed):
Mayo Clinic's guide to a healthy pregnancy
Bringing up Bébé
Expecting Better
Mama Natural week by week guide

Would love recommendations for pregnancy, childbirth, and especially parenting!

aloha_mama · September 2021

I read “Raising Good Humans” by Hunter Clarke-Fields earlier this year. It was pretty good, I use some of the techniques I learned in it daily about how to avoid reactive parenting and be more mindful. “Expecting Better” and “Hunt, Gather, Parent” are on my list of what to read next.

ETA: “Far From the Tree” by Andrew Solomon was amazing. It’s a hefty read but it was so worth it. It’s not really a parenting book with advice and guidance, more of a study on differently abled children and their families trying to navigate life. He studied schizophrenia, dwarfism, deafness, transgender, among others— there was one fascinating chapter on child prodigies. Super interesting and really thoughtfully written and researched.

minnie_yoga_mama · September 2021

I might have already recommended this in another thread but I loved “A Holistic Guide to Pregnancy and Childbirth: Magical Beginnings, Enchanted Lives” by Deepak Chopra. For anyone looking for an Ayurvedic approach to pregnancy, I highly recommend! It’s great for developing a healthy and spiritual daily routine and gives some helpful natural pain relief tips for childbirth as well. I’m considering buying the Mayo Clinic guide next for my list!

loveanddatadriven · September 2021

Cribsheet by Oster is also really good. I really loved Nurture Shock. I appreciated much of the info in The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding although not all of it resonated with me. The Birth Partner was great except H never read it. 🤣 I finally forced him to read dog-eared selections. He expresses his commitment in different ways than reading books, I guess. Expecting 411, Baby 411, and Toddler 411 books are all clutch.

I’m currently reading Dear Girls by Ali Wong, which is a very sweet and funny set of letters Ali wrote to her little girls. I also recommend Ali Wong’s Netflix standup specials if you can handle sexual crass.

For anyone worried about dog-baby relationships, I really liked Please Don’t Bite the Baby (And Please Don’t Chase the Dog).

Blondesweety444 · September 2021

I read Bringing up Bebé while DS5 was in the NICU and enjoyed it. It helped take my mind off things when there wasn’t much I could do (I couldn’t hold him for the first week). It was entertaining and had some helpful nuggets that I tried to incorporate in my parenting style.

For non pregnancy books:
I’ve been reading through the Bridgerton series. They are so good, but also quite racey (no surprise if you’ve seen the Netflix series).

Ivorytower2 · September 2021

Belly Laughs by Jenny McCarthy is a pretty funny, easy pregnancy read. The most important book I ever read as a new parent was “happiest baby on the block” by Harvey Karp. That book saved my life as a first time mom and I’ve used it ever since!

zamoraspin · September 2021

I’m reading “When You’re Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads” for dietary recommendations (eat more, and then eat more than that apparently). If anyone has any other multiples books they recommend, lmk.

I read Expecting Better when I was pregnant with DS2 and thought it was good. I think I also skimmed the classic “What to Expect”.

Anyone have any good for fun reads? I long ago was a voracious reader but practicing law seemed to kill my pleasure reading. Now that I’m not working I need to get back to reading but seem to only get into fairly light stuff.

hoosiermamajayden · September 2021

@zamoraspin2 just finished that one! Now reading The Holistic Guide to Twin Pregnancy. It feels like twin books are pretty limited in general, and then lots are more anecdotal stories (which are cool but one book for one person’s experience feels like a lot) than anything.

On the diet thing— The Brewer Diet is something I’ve been looking at as well. Similar idea as the Twins, Triplets, Quads book and lots of research behind it, but pushed more on the idea of minimizing processed/convenience foods and added sugar. The checklist of protein, carbs, fats, and extra calories seems pretty similar; just more specific.

doxiemoxie212 · September 2021

I think reading some sleep related books can be good. I really love Natalie Willis, Baby Sleep Trainer - her politics are dope, and her methods are effective, kind and best of all: really good for mom's mental health. Some others people like are Sleepwise, etc, but I don't think they help you get a sense of how you as a mom can have a predictable, stable day-to-day which was my main anxiety point with DD3. Once I found Natalie and got DD3 on an actual predictable by-the-clock nap schedule *my* functioning increased dramatically, which allowed me to be a better mom.

This is a ways down the line, but I actually really enjoyed Oh Crap as a parenting book. It's about potty training, but there's also a philosophy in there that's really helpful to keep in mind in terms of what we think babies/toddlers are capable of and what we prioritize in their lives. Her tone upset some people, but I love people who just get straight to the point so it was my jam. (It also worked super well for DD3; she potty trained in like 2 days at 22mo, and it was a really fun weekend.)

I think the typical books about pregnancy are kind of irrelevant unless you literally never took a basic sex ed class and don't understand how pregnancy works. A lot of the things they say aren't even necessarily evidence based?

If you're trying to have an unmedicated birth I think Ina May's Guide to Childbirth is pretty good. I skipped the birth stories because they're way too woowoo for me, but the second half about actual tips is pretty helpful and an interesting way of thinking about things.

SmashJam · September 2021

@doxiemoxie212 I read "Spiritual Midwifery" by her and its ALL woowoo birth stories. I read it basically out of fascination over the idea of her life-traveling from the west coast to TN by caravan, settling in a commune, and how all that played out amongst all the births was pretty interesting.

doxiemoxie212 · September 2021

@SmashJam I think I could get into it if it had more of a story, but this was just a collection of random birth stories and a lot of like.......... I don't know, almost like labor pain is orgasm type language lol

bluecampanula · September 2021

haha yes! I think Ina May’s Guide guide to childbirth is super helpful. Also super hippy and I just started rereading it again and had forgotten how much of a prude it makes me feel lol. And I don’t think hospital births are scary and terrible, but reading this first really did help me feel prepared and encouraged, no labor classes needed.

I developed a hatred towards sleep books with my first after one book/“expert” declared if I couldn’t get him to nap for more than 20 minutes at a time he would grow up to be a delinquent. Because that’s exactly what an overwhelmed and sleep deprived parent needs to hear.

ETA I have picked up some good things from the sleep books I’ve read, but no one amazing recommendation yet. And I just like to caution FTM that take strongly worded things like that with a grain of salt. 8 years in and that stubborn sleeper is a very sweet and responsible kid, not a shoplifter.

kiwi2628 · September 2021

I wasn't a book person for labor/birth stuff or even a lot of raising kids stuff, but I did love Precious Little Sleep- its very much about making sure babies have age appropriate wake windows to promote good sleep, but it also isn't like an above PP mentioned, like she is very science based and is like 'your 4 month old is only taking 20 minute crap naps? Yea...thats standard 4 month fare. This is how to navigate it'. Also Oh Crap, Potty Training.

zamoraspin · September 2021

@bluecampanula Oh no, that’s very unfortunate. It’s not unusual for babies to take short naps at certain stages. I remember being so frustrated by 20 minute naps until DS2 started to take fewer naps and his naps lengthened.

I very heartily second @kiwi2628’s recommendation of Precious Little Sleep. The book has a lot of trouble shooting and once you’ve read it if you do FB you can join the Precious Little Sleep FB group which the author participates in. Really helpful.

I also read Happiest Baby on the Block and thought it was just ok. The PLS book has a lot of the same soothing strategies but it’s not just that. I took the Taking Cara Babies newborn course and it was helpful somewhat but I still think PLS gets you there more comprehensively and for less $. (Plus I’ve since learned I’m not super keen to support Cara financially).

doxiemoxie212 · September 2021

@zamoraspin2 yeah I won't support Taking Cara Babies. Racism is not my jam.

aloha_mama · September 2021

I’m a little woo-woo, DH calls me “crunchy granola” 😂 so I love Ina May (I met her granddaughter once in a totally random place and fangirled a little). We used the Bradley Method with my first and I found it super helpful. We weren’t able to take any labor classes (nor did we really want to), but going through the book gave us a lot of techniques we ended up actually using to make sure L&D was as calm and peaceful as we could make it. And I think it helped DH a lot because the Bradley Method gives your partner a lot of options to contribute in a situation where it’s easy to feel helpless. We used “Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way” by Susan McCutcheon.

For sleep, I usually recommend my patients to read “Safe Infant Sleep” by James J. McKenna. It corrects a lot of Western bias against cosleeping and cobedding by explaining the philosophy behind it and how to do it safely and responsibly. It also explains the scientific benefits behind it, which I really appreciate. Definitely not for everyone but if that’s something you’re interested in (it’s especially beneficial to breastfeeding dyads) this is a good one to check out.

hoosiermamajayden · September 2021

Just want to chime in that I love Ina May’s books and James McKenna’s sleep research! Haven’t read his book though— I’ll have to pick that one up.

Ina May can come off as a little woo woo but it was super helpful to me and I appreciated the sharp contrast between her outlook and our modern version of “traditional childbirth.”

shlecks · September 2021

@doxiemoxie212 yyyeaahhhh the orgasm thing wasn’t for me either.

FishyMom · October 2021

Y’all are all so good, reading about motherhood and pregnancy! Here I am reading true crime books.

I have read a few books on toddler sleep, DD2 is a terrible sleeper, but she’s starting to get better. Become your child’s sleep coach by Dr. Lynelle Schneeberg.

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