So my husband and I were fortunate enough to get pregnant on our first try with our son who will be 2 in Oct. we have been trying for 2-3 months now for number 2 with no success. We definitely thought we would’ve been pregnant by now with number 2. It’s been getting harder and more frustrating the number of people that ask us when/if we’ll be having another one. Now I wish we had started trying sooner, as we didn’t expect this due to our experience with number one. I just needed a place to put my thoughts down. Appreciate any advice/kind words/etc
@kjdean88 as someone who has been trying for over a year (and I have not been on this board as long as others who have been trying for longer), I don't have much advice. However, I encourage you to read up on how this board works and introduce yourself so that you have the chance to get to know some of the wonderful women here.
ETA @fantasyflyte's description of how this board works is spot on.
Hi @kjdean88. Board culture around here is a bit different than elsewhere on the internet. We all stick by a number of rules (start by reading up on them here). Amongst other things, we do not do one-off posts like yours. If you decide to stick around, go say hi in the Newbies thread here.
Oh, and because I can't help myself, some of us on this board have been trying for a very long time to get pregnant (I, for example, have been trying since mid-2018, with no kids to show for it). If you wanna talk about frustration, please be attentive to the fact that others around here may well have experienced not only the sadness of having all your friends and family ask why you're still childless (no child#1 here!), but also growing hopelessness and resignation as people eventually stop asking, and your friends' children get older and folks you know have second or even third children in the same span of time that you've been trying for #1. What I'm saying is, 2-3 months is basically the blink of an eye. Honestly, I am baffled as to why your friends/family would have any opinion at all as to why you're not KU after 2-3 months. As your doctor or the internet will tell you, perfectly healthy and fertile couples under the age of 35 often take up to a year to get pregnant. Patience.
History
I am doing this on my own. Left ovary and fallopian tube removed due to cyst/necrosis just after birth. Right ovary and tube still purport to function.
Began TTC in Aug '18 @ age 35
5 or 6 (or 7?!) cycles using frozen donor sperm, ICI. All BFN
Mar-Jun '19 IUIs, all BFN
Began process of referral for RE in spring of '19, blood tests confirm low AMH (.54) but all else is good.
May '19 HSG shows open tube, but ultrasound suggests fibroids
MRI in June '19 confirms two large fibroids, one growing through wall of uterus
In June '19 I move from California to Oregon, disrupting my insurance, referrals, etc. 5 months spent piecing it all back together.
Nov. '19 attempted myomectomy (vaginal approach) failed. 2nd surgery using laparoscopic method in Jan '20 is successful.
April '20 --> June '20, natural IUIs, all BFN.
July? saline ultrasound and bubble test demonstrate open tube
July '20 clomid cycle cancelled for thin lining
Aug-Oct, 3 femara cycles, all BFN
RE referral. While waiting to set up an appointment Nov-Jan,I continue with natural cycles and ICI, using a known donor, BFN...
Jan '21 more bloodwork, AMH is worse (.30), FSH high albeit not catastrophic at 13.2. hysteroscopy all good. "looks cozy!" says the RE.
Feb '21, injectables (menopur, novarel), iui, BFN (doc said the frozen donor sperm sample had the "best numbers she'd ever seen!")
Mar '21, injectables, iui cancelled due to lack of follicles, converted to at home-insem. BFN
May '21, first IVF round cancelled due to cyst.
July '21 IVF: standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 7; 6 days of stims. 8 eggs retrieved, 7 mature, 5 fertilize, 4 made it to blast. 3 are 4AB, 1 is 4BB. PGT-A results all abnormal. Oct '21 somewhat improved AMH (.51) and significantly improved FSH (8.9). Maybe it's all the pills I swallow. Dec -21, standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 5; 11 days of stims. retrieval yields 5, 4M, 2 reach day-6 blast (4AB & 4BB). 1 low-level mosaic (chr. 3 deletion), 1 complex abnormal. Feb '22 FET (low-level mosaic): CP. May '22 egg retrieval, lupron flare protocol. HGH priming for 1 month before stims; md lupron 20/20u daily; menopur 225, follistim 225, 10k trigger after 8 days of stims; AFC 10; 13 retrieved; 10 mature; 8 fertilized. All frozen at 2PN for later thaw, grow, and biopsy. July '22 egg retrieval same protocol: 9 days of stims; AFC 8; 10 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 fertilized and frozen. Sept '22 ER same protocol: AFC 10; 12 retrieved, 11 mature, 11 fertilized. From the 3 retrievals, 7 survived to day 5-6 blastocyst, from which I have 2 normal embryos! Jan 20, Fully medicated FET, baby aspirin, dexamethasone, acupuncture, and as much woo as I can stand (which isn't very much). BFN. July 23, Natural FET + baby aspirin. BFN.
Word of advice.... Don't randomly complain to internet strangers that you're not pregnant after 2-3 months. Would you like to switch places with me throwing thousands of dollars down the drain, failed attempts at IUI and embryo transfers, suffer a miscarriage, and take over 4 years with zero babies to show for it?
I have no sympathy for people in your situation. Sorry not sorry 🤷♀️
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
I'm debating having a hysterectomy after my 5 MCs and no living kids. My mom legit told me the other day that I should "Just keep trying with a *different* mindset, realizing that I'll probably have many more MCs, but that one may work out and I should just keep having PGs/MCs until I get a living child." Basically, she told me I should be more *positive* while having MC after MC. As though I didn't hope my previous 5 babies would have lived. Like it's easy to just keep losing babies and I don't feel like a depressed shell from that. But hey, now that I know YOU've been struggling for 2-3 months with having your SECOND child and upset that people are asking you about it... I realize that my struggles are NOTHING compared to yours.
*TW All the Loss* #BitterHagPartyOf1
October 2015 - 1st MC. 7-8 weeks along. Suspected molar PG, but luckily just a MMC.
June 2016 - 2nd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
September 2016 - 3rd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
RE 1: ALL the testing - 'unexplained' "Yinz can do IVF or try on your own"
Feb 2017 - 4th MC: 6 weeks
RE 2: More tests. Still 'unexplained.' Called fat for an entire hour-long appointment, cried a lot
I hear you, @stormageddon-darklordofall. Thanks for speaking. This is a hell of a road, and I'm so sorry for all of your losses. And I'm sorry your mom can't figure out how to be more sensitive, sheesh.
History
I am doing this on my own. Left ovary and fallopian tube removed due to cyst/necrosis just after birth. Right ovary and tube still purport to function.
Began TTC in Aug '18 @ age 35
5 or 6 (or 7?!) cycles using frozen donor sperm, ICI. All BFN
Mar-Jun '19 IUIs, all BFN
Began process of referral for RE in spring of '19, blood tests confirm low AMH (.54) but all else is good.
May '19 HSG shows open tube, but ultrasound suggests fibroids
MRI in June '19 confirms two large fibroids, one growing through wall of uterus
In June '19 I move from California to Oregon, disrupting my insurance, referrals, etc. 5 months spent piecing it all back together.
Nov. '19 attempted myomectomy (vaginal approach) failed. 2nd surgery using laparoscopic method in Jan '20 is successful.
April '20 --> June '20, natural IUIs, all BFN.
July? saline ultrasound and bubble test demonstrate open tube
July '20 clomid cycle cancelled for thin lining
Aug-Oct, 3 femara cycles, all BFN
RE referral. While waiting to set up an appointment Nov-Jan,I continue with natural cycles and ICI, using a known donor, BFN...
Jan '21 more bloodwork, AMH is worse (.30), FSH high albeit not catastrophic at 13.2. hysteroscopy all good. "looks cozy!" says the RE.
Feb '21, injectables (menopur, novarel), iui, BFN (doc said the frozen donor sperm sample had the "best numbers she'd ever seen!")
Mar '21, injectables, iui cancelled due to lack of follicles, converted to at home-insem. BFN
May '21, first IVF round cancelled due to cyst.
July '21 IVF: standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 7; 6 days of stims. 8 eggs retrieved, 7 mature, 5 fertilize, 4 made it to blast. 3 are 4AB, 1 is 4BB. PGT-A results all abnormal. Oct '21 somewhat improved AMH (.51) and significantly improved FSH (8.9). Maybe it's all the pills I swallow. Dec -21, standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 5; 11 days of stims. retrieval yields 5, 4M, 2 reach day-6 blast (4AB & 4BB). 1 low-level mosaic (chr. 3 deletion), 1 complex abnormal. Feb '22 FET (low-level mosaic): CP. May '22 egg retrieval, lupron flare protocol. HGH priming for 1 month before stims; md lupron 20/20u daily; menopur 225, follistim 225, 10k trigger after 8 days of stims; AFC 10; 13 retrieved; 10 mature; 8 fertilized. All frozen at 2PN for later thaw, grow, and biopsy. July '22 egg retrieval same protocol: 9 days of stims; AFC 8; 10 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 fertilized and frozen. Sept '22 ER same protocol: AFC 10; 12 retrieved, 11 mature, 11 fertilized. From the 3 retrievals, 7 survived to day 5-6 blastocyst, from which I have 2 normal embryos! Jan 20, Fully medicated FET, baby aspirin, dexamethasone, acupuncture, and as much woo as I can stand (which isn't very much). BFN. July 23, Natural FET + baby aspirin. BFN.
@optimistgardener I'm always here to provide an unhealthy dose of pessimistic reality! And yeah, my mom's version of *support* throughout this whole process has been pretty shytty and not really *supportive* in any way that I need. She cares, but has like no basis in reality for what she should say (I know, I know... despite me advocating for people talking out about PG and baby loss, and posting TONS of stuff on my social media accounts about HOW to support people going through this and what to/NOT to say.... she is still VERY *obtuse* about her *helping*)
*TW All the Loss* #BitterHagPartyOf1
October 2015 - 1st MC. 7-8 weeks along. Suspected molar PG, but luckily just a MMC.
June 2016 - 2nd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
September 2016 - 3rd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
RE 1: ALL the testing - 'unexplained' "Yinz can do IVF or try on your own"
Feb 2017 - 4th MC: 6 weeks
RE 2: More tests. Still 'unexplained.' Called fat for an entire hour-long appointment, cried a lot
btw your gif game is A+ (i speak as a woman with no gif game whatsoever).
History
I am doing this on my own. Left ovary and fallopian tube removed due to cyst/necrosis just after birth. Right ovary and tube still purport to function.
Began TTC in Aug '18 @ age 35
5 or 6 (or 7?!) cycles using frozen donor sperm, ICI. All BFN
Mar-Jun '19 IUIs, all BFN
Began process of referral for RE in spring of '19, blood tests confirm low AMH (.54) but all else is good.
May '19 HSG shows open tube, but ultrasound suggests fibroids
MRI in June '19 confirms two large fibroids, one growing through wall of uterus
In June '19 I move from California to Oregon, disrupting my insurance, referrals, etc. 5 months spent piecing it all back together.
Nov. '19 attempted myomectomy (vaginal approach) failed. 2nd surgery using laparoscopic method in Jan '20 is successful.
April '20 --> June '20, natural IUIs, all BFN.
July? saline ultrasound and bubble test demonstrate open tube
July '20 clomid cycle cancelled for thin lining
Aug-Oct, 3 femara cycles, all BFN
RE referral. While waiting to set up an appointment Nov-Jan,I continue with natural cycles and ICI, using a known donor, BFN...
Jan '21 more bloodwork, AMH is worse (.30), FSH high albeit not catastrophic at 13.2. hysteroscopy all good. "looks cozy!" says the RE.
Feb '21, injectables (menopur, novarel), iui, BFN (doc said the frozen donor sperm sample had the "best numbers she'd ever seen!")
Mar '21, injectables, iui cancelled due to lack of follicles, converted to at home-insem. BFN
May '21, first IVF round cancelled due to cyst.
July '21 IVF: standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 7; 6 days of stims. 8 eggs retrieved, 7 mature, 5 fertilize, 4 made it to blast. 3 are 4AB, 1 is 4BB. PGT-A results all abnormal. Oct '21 somewhat improved AMH (.51) and significantly improved FSH (8.9). Maybe it's all the pills I swallow. Dec -21, standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 5; 11 days of stims. retrieval yields 5, 4M, 2 reach day-6 blast (4AB & 4BB). 1 low-level mosaic (chr. 3 deletion), 1 complex abnormal. Feb '22 FET (low-level mosaic): CP. May '22 egg retrieval, lupron flare protocol. HGH priming for 1 month before stims; md lupron 20/20u daily; menopur 225, follistim 225, 10k trigger after 8 days of stims; AFC 10; 13 retrieved; 10 mature; 8 fertilized. All frozen at 2PN for later thaw, grow, and biopsy. July '22 egg retrieval same protocol: 9 days of stims; AFC 8; 10 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 fertilized and frozen. Sept '22 ER same protocol: AFC 10; 12 retrieved, 11 mature, 11 fertilized. From the 3 retrievals, 7 survived to day 5-6 blastocyst, from which I have 2 normal embryos! Jan 20, Fully medicated FET, baby aspirin, dexamethasone, acupuncture, and as much woo as I can stand (which isn't very much). BFN. July 23, Natural FET + baby aspirin. BFN.
Re: TTC Baby #2
ETA @fantasyflyte's description of how this board works is spot on.
https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12761299/health-discussion#latest
Oct '21 somewhat improved AMH (.51) and significantly improved FSH (8.9). Maybe it's all the pills I swallow.
Dec -21, standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 5; 11 days of stims. retrieval yields 5, 4M, 2 reach day-6 blast (4AB & 4BB). 1 low-level mosaic (chr. 3 deletion), 1 complex abnormal.
Feb '22 FET (low-level mosaic): CP.
May '22 egg retrieval, lupron flare protocol. HGH priming for 1 month before stims; md lupron 20/20u daily; menopur 225, follistim 225, 10k trigger after 8 days of stims; AFC 10; 13 retrieved; 10 mature; 8 fertilized. All frozen at 2PN for later thaw, grow, and biopsy.
July '22 egg retrieval same protocol: 9 days of stims; AFC 8; 10 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 fertilized and frozen.
Sept '22 ER same protocol: AFC 10; 12 retrieved, 11 mature, 11 fertilized.
From the 3 retrievals, 7 survived to day 5-6 blastocyst, from which I have 2 normal embryos!
Jan 20, Fully medicated FET, baby aspirin, dexamethasone, acupuncture, and as much woo as I can stand (which isn't very much). BFN.
July 23, Natural FET + baby aspirin. BFN.
I have no sympathy for people in your situation. Sorry not sorry 🤷♀️
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
For what it’s worth, getting pregnant on your first try is not the norm - and not getting pregnant within the first 2-3 months is much more the norm.
October 2015 - 1st MC. 7-8 weeks along. Suspected molar PG, but luckily just a MMC.
June 2016 - 2nd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
September 2016 - 3rd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
RE 1: ALL the testing - 'unexplained' "Yinz can do IVF or try on your own"
Feb 2017 - 4th MC: 6 weeks
RE 2: More tests. Still 'unexplained.' Called fat for an entire hour-long appointment, cried a lot
Feb 2019 - 5th MC: 6-7 weeks
IUD - March 2019-March 2023
RE 3: Repeat all the tests. Hoping to try IVF.
Oct '21 somewhat improved AMH (.51) and significantly improved FSH (8.9). Maybe it's all the pills I swallow.
Dec -21, standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 5; 11 days of stims. retrieval yields 5, 4M, 2 reach day-6 blast (4AB & 4BB). 1 low-level mosaic (chr. 3 deletion), 1 complex abnormal.
Feb '22 FET (low-level mosaic): CP.
May '22 egg retrieval, lupron flare protocol. HGH priming for 1 month before stims; md lupron 20/20u daily; menopur 225, follistim 225, 10k trigger after 8 days of stims; AFC 10; 13 retrieved; 10 mature; 8 fertilized. All frozen at 2PN for later thaw, grow, and biopsy.
July '22 egg retrieval same protocol: 9 days of stims; AFC 8; 10 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 fertilized and frozen.
Sept '22 ER same protocol: AFC 10; 12 retrieved, 11 mature, 11 fertilized.
From the 3 retrievals, 7 survived to day 5-6 blastocyst, from which I have 2 normal embryos!
Jan 20, Fully medicated FET, baby aspirin, dexamethasone, acupuncture, and as much woo as I can stand (which isn't very much). BFN.
July 23, Natural FET + baby aspirin. BFN.
And yeah, my mom's version of *support* throughout this whole process has been pretty shytty and not really *supportive* in any way that I need. She cares, but has like no basis in reality for what she should say (I know, I know... despite me advocating for people talking out about PG and baby loss, and posting TONS of stuff on my social media accounts about HOW to support people going through this and what to/NOT to say.... she is still VERY *obtuse* about her *helping*)
October 2015 - 1st MC. 7-8 weeks along. Suspected molar PG, but luckily just a MMC.
June 2016 - 2nd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
September 2016 - 3rd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
RE 1: ALL the testing - 'unexplained' "Yinz can do IVF or try on your own"
Feb 2017 - 4th MC: 6 weeks
RE 2: More tests. Still 'unexplained.' Called fat for an entire hour-long appointment, cried a lot
Feb 2019 - 5th MC: 6-7 weeks
IUD - March 2019-March 2023
RE 3: Repeat all the tests. Hoping to try IVF.
Oct '21 somewhat improved AMH (.51) and significantly improved FSH (8.9). Maybe it's all the pills I swallow.
Dec -21, standard antagonist. 225menupur/225gonal-f/cetrotide/5000u trigger, AFC 5; 11 days of stims. retrieval yields 5, 4M, 2 reach day-6 blast (4AB & 4BB). 1 low-level mosaic (chr. 3 deletion), 1 complex abnormal.
Feb '22 FET (low-level mosaic): CP.
May '22 egg retrieval, lupron flare protocol. HGH priming for 1 month before stims; md lupron 20/20u daily; menopur 225, follistim 225, 10k trigger after 8 days of stims; AFC 10; 13 retrieved; 10 mature; 8 fertilized. All frozen at 2PN for later thaw, grow, and biopsy.
July '22 egg retrieval same protocol: 9 days of stims; AFC 8; 10 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 fertilized and frozen.
Sept '22 ER same protocol: AFC 10; 12 retrieved, 11 mature, 11 fertilized.
From the 3 retrievals, 7 survived to day 5-6 blastocyst, from which I have 2 normal embryos!
Jan 20, Fully medicated FET, baby aspirin, dexamethasone, acupuncture, and as much woo as I can stand (which isn't very much). BFN.
July 23, Natural FET + baby aspirin. BFN.
October 2015 - 1st MC. 7-8 weeks along. Suspected molar PG, but luckily just a MMC.
June 2016 - 2nd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
September 2016 - 3rd MC: 4-5 weeks CP
RE 1: ALL the testing - 'unexplained' "Yinz can do IVF or try on your own"
Feb 2017 - 4th MC: 6 weeks
RE 2: More tests. Still 'unexplained.' Called fat for an entire hour-long appointment, cried a lot
Feb 2019 - 5th MC: 6-7 weeks
IUD - March 2019-March 2023
RE 3: Repeat all the tests. Hoping to try IVF.